Speak Out: Awkward Place to Have a Boner
It’s safe to say that all of us have an awkward boner experience to share. It’s probably happened to the best of us, as it’s something that we can’t control. The question is where were you when you had an unwanted erection and what did you do in order to hide it? More importantly, did you succeed in hiding your raging boner or did anybody notice?
There’s so many places where you could get a boner. You could get one in the gym, when you’re exercising and looking at all the bodies around you. You’re probably wearing a pair of sweatpants that make your erection extremely noticeable. Even worse, you could get one while you’re in the shower surrounded by other men, and there’s no hiding there.
Maybe you were out having a good time with your buddies from college and this guy whom you’ve had a long-term crush flirted or talked with you? Or maybe you smell him and then unfortunately, without warning, you popped a boner for everyone else to see.
Perhaps you’re in the changing room in the mall, and you think of all the naughty things you can get up to with the right guy while in that small space. Now you’re stuck there while you wait for your erection to deflate.
What if you’re doing a presentation and your mind wanders to that hot hook-up you had last night, or you catch the eye of your office crush and his body language is quite plainly telling you that he’s down to have sex if you are — maybe even right here in the office. Have you ever popped a boner when you’re the center of this much attention?
Anyway, any awkward boner stories to share, guys? How did you get out of that hard situation? Did you pretend not to notice? Scramble for cover? What? Share with us your boner stories in the comments section below.
I got a raging hard on working with a young cop on a construction road job.
He was a nice guy and handsome as all hell,he kept doing squats like you do when your balls stick to your legs and you want to un stick them, this made me wonder if his were shaved, I wanted to help him out
Officer Mastriani on Live PD is delicious.
Getting with a cop would be so hot….
A lot depends on how big your cock is to begin with. My cock is 7 inches long limp. Hard, it grows a bit in length and definitely in girth, but if I’m commando, I look like I have a hard on all the time. Needless to say I choose underwear and positioning to minimize the look. An actual hard on would be distressing to the locals. LOL
I have had a hard on in church. I’ve had a hard on in front of my doctor.
Why be embarrassed about it. It is a natural thing
I discovered, back in high school, that if I carried my penis straight up, pointing at my navel, then I could hide it behind the zipper/fly without it being too noticeable. It also enabled me to lean against things to pressure it to either feel good or go down. I wish it were like that now. As much as I enjoy seeing other guys’s size and shape, straight up is the most discreet position for us to use.
I had to lol when I read this. In my case around the age of 10 I started having non stop ragging hard ons.
My cock was no bigger then a my index finger at the time, but despite its size it had a min of ours own and was always hard.
By time I turned 12 I had discovered the wonders of masturbation, while I never ejaculated in those early days I sure did enjoy the numerous dry climaxes. I also found that frequently jacking off often seemed to solve my embarrassing public hard ons with great success.
Unless I’ve got a hot date going that day, I Jack off every morning and everynight, it keeps me from embarrassing myself publicly with great regularity.
No place is awkward. Be proud. Show off your boners. I sure do
Where do you live? Lol!
It would always be 10 minutes before the bell in high school, tenth grade seemed to be the worst. I’d sit there worrying about how I’d be getting to the next class. Fortunately this was pre-backpack era and I could carry my books unnaturally low. I never worried about gym showers. I’m sure it was a deeply ingrained self-preservation instinct. A guy would probably got himself beaten to death back then for popping wood. I would take in as much of the scenery as I could though for use later in my bedroom.
I would hate to get a hardon at my doctor’s office, especially if I were getting a physical. Don’t care if it was a Male or female doctor. Just not the place for it.
Since “boners” (omg…I haven’t heard that word for decades) are a natural occurrence, getting one is never awkward. If someone else notices and gets offended, that’s not my problem. Most guys are intrigued by another guy’s “boner.”
oh yea. I was talking to my straight boss ( ? ) always wondered, I did have a hot crush on him and he knew it because of the way I acted towards him. He was wearing a nice tight pair of black dress pants and for some reason I got the biggest erection, I tried to hide it but he knew I was uncomfortable. He saw me squirming and said “don’t worry about it, things happen”
After a while he called me into his office and said, ” if that happens again, don’t walk around the office that way, come in my office until you relax.” I did take him up on the offer a few times but never got the nerve to tell him that I wanted him in the worst and best way. We no longer work together but I think of him often and pop one just thinking about him.
I’m in my late 60’s. There is no awkward place for me to get a boner. I’m always proud when it happens and wherever it happens.
Ever morning for 2 years 8am swimming class, school issued speedo type suit which showed everything. It was a coed class, female instructor. Little Johnny was always stiff. My only regret is that now 50 years later, things don’t work so well.
underneath an apron while u are working and talking to a hot customer LOL
Wrestling in a tournament when I was in HS. I actually blew my load while pinning my opponent. My best friend growing up noticed because a spot was showing through my singlet. He got me to the locker room as quick as he could so others didn’t notice. I did not know he was gay (I am bi) as I showered he joined me. First time I was fucked by a man. Fuck it was hot.
holy cow… that’s an amazing story. Did he fuck you in the gym shower?
Junior College swim class 8 am. Twice a week for 2 years. Speedo type issued swim trunk which showed everything. Coed class, female instructor. I would stand at the pool edge wishing” can we please get in the water.” My only regret is now 50 years later things don’t work so well.
Two places I can think of…at the doctor’s office and in the barracks shower in boot camp. Both have happened.
8 am swim class at junior college. 2 days every week, speedo type briefs, coed, female instructor. A raging stiff one. I would stand in line for roll call thinking can we please get in the water. 50 years later, I wish things still worked as well.
I was 18, and starting a new job and was required to take a physical. It was such short notice that i had trouble getting an appointment.My girlfriend suggests she could get me in with her doctor, a (gynecology) doc. Went in the next day at 8 in the morning. Was instructed to go into room 3 disrobe down to my undies lay on the table someone will be in shortly.. after about ten minutes laying there with time to think and nonchalantly playing with a semi erection, after about ten minutes more a raging hardon sticking out the elastic band in walks the doctor .. I hear her gasp cough a little bit she walks over and nonchalantly grabs my undies pulls them down checks my balls… turn and cough turn and cough lol. Pulls my undies back in place pats the head of my dick,chuckles and says you are healthy lol.. i think she got a bit of pre cum on her finger.. she went out with the paper work i got dressed and tried to hide the hardon while checking out. With a ful room of pregnant women. Oh to be that young and hard again lol
I got on at Subway restaurant one day. And of course, they don’t have table cloths on their tables. A guy walked by & definitely noticed, gave me a wink, & kept on walking. Took on a whole new definition of having a footlong 🙂
I remember a television special in the late 60s, I think with Rowan and Martin as hosts where they were talking about an arsonist on the loose in the neighborhood of the theatre, but, not to worry, Batman was on the case. Adam West in the full Batman regalia came on stage and I swear he had a hardon. I was only about 13, but I knew what a hardon was. I think Rowan and Martin noticed, too, as the jokes were a little off-subject.
Of course, after Batman left they went to the next act and the curtains opened to a burned down set.
Terribly tacky comedy, but great embarrassment to enjoy and ogle.
Hey guys! Well, when I was in 6th grade For some reason I would get boners all the time in the middle of class. At that time I was starting to notice boys and become aroused by them. Anyways the kids used to notice and so my nickname used to be Boner Boy, I was so embarassed but I couldn’t help it. There was a particular time that I couldn’t take it anymore and I began rubbing my dick as subtly as I could until I came. I don’t think anyone noticed though I’m sure if they did they would have said something
I don’t think there is anyplace more awkward to get surprise boner than all of seventh grade.
I was in the Navy at a division inspection. In my dress whites, standing between two hot guys that I work with and a hot division officer looking us over. There was nothing I could do. I just stood there at attention and when the officer passed by, there was no way he could miss my hard-on. Only wishing all 3 of the men (the officer and the 2 co-workers) would take me to some secluded space and we could suck and fuck for some time. Of course, this only made me harder.
I’m still in the Navy and I love seeing fit Sailor’s in their dress whites.
When I was a teenager. Yeh, then.
And since when engaged with a partner.
Most amazing time. YES amazing was a hard on at doctors during physical. Was so embarrassed at first but he was unbelievably HOT. He just smiled said it happens more than one thinks. He just continue with physical till he did an anal exam. I finally was relaxing n my hard on was finally going down and then one n then two fingers when up my ass. He hit all right spots n then next thing I knew I was hard as rock. When I turned around I almost slapped him in the face He then took it in hand and proceeded to suck me off. Took every drop I had in me! Smiled when done n said thanks. Well he called me that weekend n we fucked all weekend! He’s been my partner now for 4 years. But my exams are now in the bedroom!
DAMN.
NOW THAT’S “DOCTOR FEEL GOOD IN THE MORNING”
TRUE STORY: I went to a wake with a guy one time on a date. When we arrive, not only did the guy in the coffin have on the same blazer and pants I was wearing, but he was really cute, well at least for a dead guy. And yes, out of nowhere it happened to me then. I just about died, but (pun intended) we already had a stiff in the coffin as well as the one on me.
Last week… in a boardroom with all of the stockholders/trustees/owners sitting around the table. Prob about 20 ppl. The meeting was going stale and the next presenter had a PowerPoint to show and talk numbers. I was hoping the meeting would end as I had a hookup scheduled immediately following. He sent me two vids (one was him cumming a huge load & the other was him fucking his husband). I was wearing a silver suit, kinda tight in the ass with the jacket on back of the chair across the room. I’m rock solid thinking I’m getting that cock in an hour. She begins he presentation. The lamp in the projector burns out as soon as she turned it on. She fumbles with it and then has the brilliant idea to hold off until the break for her presentation and introduce me for mine didn’t need a projector. My cock was buried under my belt buckle. It would have jumped out if my belt was a notch less. So my boss agreed with her and put a lot of emphasis on my presentation how it better be perfect. I was the reason they were really there. I go to stand up and press it against the table. It wasn’t going down. So I approached the head of the table and tried to “hide” behind one side. The 24yo hottie who was like an assistant to the meeting was fixated on my cock. It only made me more nervous. 5ppl deep on both side sides of the table def knew I was rock hard. They were all looking at one point or another throughout my presentation. I turned my 25 minutes in to 10minutes with questions. My boss was not happy.
On a side note, I got to the hook up after the meeting. We sucked each other off and I fuck him with that rock hard cock. It was awesome!
My awkward time was during my annual physical with a new male dr. He had me bend over for the prostate exam part and I got rock hard. He noticed and told me that happens sometimes. He said it was nice size 8 1/2 inches . He then grab my balls & had me turn my head and cough. He assured mew that it was perfectly normal. I noticed that he kept glancing down at my boner during the rest of the exam.
For me it was in my late 20’s on a public transportation bus. Every morning going to work in the downtown area of my city the bus would travel on a city street till it turned on to the expressway and would increase speed to 55+ MPH. I usually sat at the rear of the bus on one of the sideways facing seats, during this high speed portion of the trip the engine would make the seats vibrate and I would get the most fiercest raging hard on. My suit pants were rather form fitting so there was no hiding it. I would think about how I would get off the bus when it reached my stop without causing a scene. Thankfully I carried a briefcase/portfolio at the time and could hold it in front of my crotch and walk to my workplace with no one the wiser till it went down.
Getting a pat down at airport security. He was a dumpy nothing but there I was, spread eagle, everyone watching, 501’s bursting. I felt like a god. So I gave them something to worship.
As a teen, I pretty much zoned out at church, but then I started having them at church when I was kneeling. Awkward to stand up. Difficult to hide. Didn’t realize till years later that everyone there always sat in the same seats, and right in front of me was a married guy with the nicest ass I’ve ever seen.
Teenager in high school. First ROTC uniform inspection day, so we had to stand, individually, and march to the front of the class and be inspected. It was taking forever (5 columns of 11-15 desks) so I fell asleep. I woke up as my column started getting called to the front. I’m about 6 desks back, and have the worst (best?) case of pig-iron to date, and I’m trying my damndest to get rid of it, bc there’s NO hiding it in uniform. I’m desperately hoping SOMETHING would happen and save me. When we get to the 3rd person in my column, the principle came over the speaker and told all teachers to turn onthe class tv’s bc there’s a national emergency. It was 9/11/2001.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to be insensitive to the tragedy in NYC… it’s just a true story. It was years before I even told anyone, lol.
Getting a boner while naked in the men’s locker room at the gym
No better place for tube steak than on the Tube itself!
No better place for a thick tube steak than on the Tube itself, mate!
All through my Jr High years. In 7th grade, I was sitting in class listening to Mrs. Parker, a teacher I absolutely hated and for no apparent reason, got a raging boner, so Parker decides that I am the guy that needs to stand up and answer the next stupid question. I’m pretty sure everyone in class noticed, not just my raging hard-on, but also my red face. There were other times, as well, but that’s the one that sticks out in my mind. (see what I did there? 😉 )
We had one kid in Jr High that used to advertise his boner. I was sitting next to him in class one day and he whispers to me “hey, look”. I look over at him and he’s looking down at his dick, so I look down and see him flexing his boner. I swear, if we had been alone, I would have ripped his pants off and sucked him off right there!
All the time I spent in the showers in high school and I never had a problem there!
“BIG MESSS”
Remember heading to school, rush hour on the F train.
gotten cramp and tight. I had my art portfolio with me at the side. the gent in front was a good-looking guy. THE DAM THING GOT UP AND WAS BETWEAN US /8.5UN. you know he was straight, tried to revers back. more peeps stepped in. It gotten tighter, I stabbed him with my Dick. he almost freaked, by his expression on his face quickly became discreet. now his hands was in his pocket slowly rubbing my dick . ??? I was like “What the F***K !!!!”,in my mind. Try to cover the rubbing with my portfolio because everyone was around ………..I had the biggest NUT the circumference of a foot stained wet patch on my pants that dripped down my leg. Embarrassingly to say, it was F-ing good, my stop Lexington AV in Manhattan from Roosevelt Queens, was a tight and scary commute. I had to walk out to school with this stained wet look ,soon to be crispy that will stay with me after 3:pm….. everyone seen my satin OUT OF THE TRAIN ON 2nd Ave all through the school…….. wondering what was in their minds …. and me with a smile on my face