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Speak Out: When Did You Lose Your Virginity?

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When it comes to virginity and stories of losing it, it’s usually the stories of women who get the lion’s share of the attention. It’s not surprising — straight guys put such a high and misplaced premium on it.

So when a guy talks about losing his virginity, it’s bound to get some attention. Former Teen Wolf  and Arrow  cast member Colton Haynes did just that on Andy Cohen’s Sirius XM radio show Andy Cohen Live. He didn’t kist talk about when he lost it to a girl, though. He also shared when he first had sex with a guy.

“I lost my virginity at 13 to a girl and a guy,” he said, clarifying that it was not a threesome but two separate encounters. “I’ve never said that before. The girl was two years older than me, and the guy was, I would say, around 16… Everyone participated. It was a real first time. It was exciting.”

Whether a 16-year-old should be having sex with a 13-year-old is another discussion entirely. But it would appear that Haynes may be a bit of an outlier — the Kinsey Institute says the average age of  first intercourse for American males is at 16.8 years.

Haynes’ story has us curious: At what age did you Adam4Adam readers lose your virginity? If you’re bisexual, what age did you lose it to a guy, and what age did you lose it to a girl? How good or bad was it? We’d love to hear your stories! Share it with us in the comments section below!


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  1. Goldenloverinmym

    i lost my virginity at 13 to a neighbor hood slut many of my buddies had already had theirs taken buy the same girl i think she was about 15 or 16. my gay virginity was to a younger guy he was about 45 i was 53 just oral sex then i was 54 first time for anal sex then when i was 55 i knew i was gay and only gay sex since then and now i wouldn’t go back if i could

  2. JockstrapfanInLA

    I was 15. My grandfather passed away and I flew to his funeral. I stayed with my grandmother for the summer. While there, my older cousin a hot football jock seduced me. Nobody ever told me about sex. My cousin taught me to jack off. The first time I shot my load I went wild with the pleasure of shooting my load. My cousin then trained me to suck his cock and we got into 69ing and swallowing each other’s loads. I came home, and saw my best friend, taught him how to jack off and soon we were jacking each other, 69ing and swallowing each other’s loads. We got off on stripping down to our jockstraps and swapping them after we shot a load in them.

  3. maneater5674

    Well I hate to admit to it, but I lost mine first to a little black girl when I was nine and so was she. Her brothers and sisters edged both of us on until we did it in a barn while they watched. and yes I was inside her and I think I did cum. but it was fast and over with pretty quick. they say your not a man until you crack black oak. well I guess my manhood started at 9 yrs old. But the plot gets thicker. I didn’t have any type of sex again until I was 14. Then it happened. I had my first boy to boy experience . got into trouble and got put in a juvenile hold over center. 2 black 17 yr old brothers were there and told me I had to do what they wanted or else. guess what they had the biggest cocks I’ve ever seen. and they had one hold me while the other spit on his big black cock and forced it in my bottom and fucked me hard until he unloaded in me then the other one took his turn. he did the same. it hurt like hell. but now I was ready for the big time they told me. after a couple of years I ran away from home and thumbed my way to FLA. well wouldn’t you know had a gay guy pick me up and rode with him to FLA and after countless blow jobs from him, it was my turn to return the flavors. I didn’t want to go back home so I turned into his bitch boy for a few months. after sucking his cock and then getting fucked by him. I realized I was really starting to enjoy this. so life went on hooked up with a lot of girls but always had the deep desire for a man. and the story go’s . I am now a lot older and I luv to suck cock and get fucked by men only. that’s my story of how I lost cherry.
    I still like women but will go for a man first. it a foot note I thinks it’s a little strange the my first girl was a black girl and my first boy was also black. and i’m just a plain old white guy. and I like them big black cocks a lot.

  4. Mark

    I lost my virginity with a girl at age 18, and with a guy at 20. The guy sorry is much more interesting, I had met a friend’s uncle a few days before moving to a new city. My friend and i had dinner with her aunt and uncle after church one Sunday. My gaydar wondered about this guy. I moved away and a few weeks later the uncle called me up to say he was in town. I invited him over to see my apartment. He soon showed up at my door with beer in hand. We chatted and drank, some how the conservation turned to sex. Then my Hustler magazines came out, i bought Hustler to see both cock and pussy. As we looked through the magazine’s he placed his hand on my crotch. I was hard and out felt like his hand would burn through the jeans. He then said” i would like to take care of that for you”. Even though i had thought about cock for years, i turned him down. He was polite and left. I hardly slept that night as i was mad at myself for turning him down.
    A couple weeks later i got my nerve up and called him. I stated that i had been thinking about that night, he commented that we were both kind of drunk, i agreed with him but told him he should stop by next time he was in town.
    A few weeks later he called and was in town, i invited him over telling him i was going to movie later. Soon he was at my door, i let him in, and we chatted, but nothing about sex. I finally stated i needed to shower and walked to the bathroom followed by him. He sat on the counter as i started to undress. As i went to remove my jeans and underwear i turned my back to him. I turned to get in the shower and he could see my boner. He asked “want me to wash your back?” I responded “i just want you in the shower with me” his clothes were off in a flash and he entered the hot water with me. He kissed and held me deeply, while playing with my cock. I was in heaven, then to make things better he lowered himself to suck my cock. Itvwas my first blow job and felt wonderful, i was surprised when he stood up, turned around, grabbed my cock and pointed it to his sweet ass. My cock instinctivly slide in his hole and started thrusting. As i pounded his ass it felt incredible, but then he pulled away. Again he held me and kissed me while jacking my cock. Soon i was spraying my load. We dried each other off and got dressed. He left and we never played again.

  5. sexdad

    First time to suck a cock 12, first time to get anally penetrated 13. Both by same older boy who was 16. First time for intercourse with a girl I was 14, she was also older at 16.

  6. Michael

    I’m not entirely sure what age, but I’m guessing before I was 12 years old. It was to a guy living next door, who would get aggressive playing a popular wrestler of the day. Suffered shame and guilt for that for WAYYYYYYYYYYYY too long! “Guilt”, because I liked it… “Shame”, because of societal ‘norms’ and siblings who knew it happened, did nothing, and blaming me for so many years. UNTIL I realized it was, in a way, me torturing myself!

  7. Brian

    This is going to be a bit of a buzzkill but since you asked… I was 13, molested and raped by a priest visiting our local church. Big black guy, very gentle hands but rough, I wasn’t into it at all. I still remember looking at the semen and blood stains on my tightly whiteies after wondering if my asshole would stop spasming. I tried to talk to my foster parents about it but they were really religious, I was outcast and started doing stupid shit. Tried to burn down the church a year and a half later… Juvie… Got attacked more times than I care to remember, finally convinced one of the older guys to use more lube and go slow.. actually decently enjoyable. Got out and went to school, scholarship! Finished now and wondering if I can meet the right guy for me!

  8. Rano

    I am a late boomer, I lost my virginity to a girl when I was 30. She was younger than me. Then I lost my virginity to a guy at 33 and it was a painful one, extremely painful. It took me months to recover.

  9. Mitch

    I don’t believe I’d ever tell this story out loud, but I’m a exceedingly full grown adult male and I’m still a virgin. I would never admit this to any friend or family. Though I’ve come close do deciding to have intercourse, the sheer fear of catching something usually enters my mind and nothing happens outside of a little making out and uncomfortable conversation. I feel good that I’m a virgin, but no matter what, I’d never tell that fact to anyone I’m interested in…. In this lifestyle, being a older grown virgin is fround upon.

    • ajpat

      Please don’t feel badly anymore. You are fine! Do what is right for you! Remember… there are guys out here who would help you. Just find the right one. I would help you. Hope you find what you want.

  10. M2minmidmi

    I was at my Freshman Orientation and I met a Junior lady the first night I was there. She walked up to me at the record player because she liked the Boz Skaggs album I had chosen. Three nights later we spent the night together and I lost my virginity to a lady. That was in 1976.

    Then in 2013 I had some strong bicurious feelings. I met a man on here and I told him that I had never been with a man before. We met at a hotel and that night I had my first sexual experience with a man. We played all night long and I was no longer bicurious!!

  11. Darrell in PA

    I was 13. My best friend and I were at a local pool. I found a girly magazine in the restroom. We took it to my house where we paged through it. This led to jerking off in front of each other then mutual jerk off, then sucking. This went on till we were 17.

  12. bi boy

    i started dating late, while at college, she was a virgin and saving herself till marriage. i began having oral and petting at 20, intercourse at 23 and sex with a guy at 35. i was denying my bisexuality till then, a bad break up with my gf at the time.

  13. bigprick69GA

    18 yo. First to a woman (prostitute) that my friends made me visit. Miserable introduction.

    Second to a guy smoking weed in the dorm. Talk wandered to horniness and things fell into place. Freaked me out, but I’ve kept creeping back for another taste.

  14. Dylan

    As a top I lost my virginity at 16yo. The bottom was my best friend. I asked him and he said,”yeah we ain’t got nothing else going on.” It was awwweeefullll! Nothing went right. Even the bed we were on had wheels. Every time I pulled out the bed went with me. Every time I went to drive it home, the bed went with me. Horrible experience. I’ve since mastered topping.

    As a bottom, it was taken from me by force and the use of roofies/alcohol on my 19th birthday. Great way to celebrate your birthday. I don’t celebrate birthdays any more.

  15. wporter

    I was nine years old. My brother was twelve. We fooled around for a year. The first time I came, was in his mouth. I didn’t even know I could do that with my hand.

    • Joel

      Frett not….virginity is not something you want to “lose”, but rather something you want to give as a gift to someone you cherish very much and in whom you have total trust and respect.

  16. Francis

    I lost my virginity in 5th grade so however old you are then… 11? But he was 11 as well so it wasn’t illegal out anything perverted.. we were two school friends who were very interested in our bodies. We continued our sexual relationship for 4 years everyday after school while our parents were at work. He had a massive Puerto Rican and I have a nice and tight Asian so was a perfect match! First started out oral sex then abt 6 months in we tried Anal.. it hurt in the beginning but seeing him get pleasure from my body turned me on. Jump to today I am a power bottom lol.

  17. Alex

    Lost mine at 14 to a girl. And 18 to a man. Best part about losing it to a man was that I was so horny I just wanted a blow job. But he did such a good job at keeping wanting more that I ended up doing anything he wanted just so he would continue to blow me. And that’s how I became a bottom. After fucking me he did finish the blow job.

  18. VirtualPleasure

    i guess i’m a late bloomer: i was an 18-year old college freshman when i first had sex with a girl (even though, i’d been fantasizing about it for years on end), and i was 21 when i lost my virginity to a guy (out of extreme curiosity about what gay guys could possibly being doing with each other, i decided to conduct an experiment, introduced myself to a gay guy i met via the personal ads in a local paper and asked him to show me what they did sexually; it was supposed to be a one-time thing, but i went back for more the next week and the rest is history).

  19. Jeremy

    I was 14 with a guy it was with my friends older
    Brother he was 17. It was awesome. He taught me everything about sex gay and straight. He taught me to j/o we did oral and anal and he taught me massage. We did it every day. A few weeks later he showed me about women with his girlfriend it was a great time for me. I would have sex with him and she would watch and then with her and he would watch. Sometimes with them both together. I was like a play toy for them. This went on for about a year until he left for college. Best time of my life.

  20. Tman

    I was around 16 when I sat on my best friends cock after fooling around for a few years w him..hurt like a mf…i tried it once again and was like noooooppppe….i lost it w a girl at 18, a no th n4 our wedding (that’s a while other story). After 16 yrs of marriage, got divorced and started dating men for the first time…my first bf, I was 34 and he cried when we had sex the first time…that one was special since I loved him and it was the first time having sex w a guy I was in love w. My experience w my best friend as teens was mostly robotic n i wasn’t sure if I was even gay then.

  21. Thug

    I hit the ground running with my boner in my hand trying to find somebody with whom to share it. I was humping hienies and bumping dick heads as far back as I can remember. Family lore includes a story of me loudly announcing to the little girl across the street that I could no longer come over there because she pulls my diapers down. I liked to build forts. We’d play army and super heroes and Robin Hood and cowboys and Indians then we’d retire to the fort to play doctors and treat each other’s wounds from battle which was always good nekkid fun. I loved the feel of my buddy’s hands on my body. I had a pair of NASA overalls from the Mercury space program under which I would go naked with the exception of my very first jockstrap. I felt like such a stud I’d walk around with my boner tucked under my jockstrap’s waistband to keep from showing. At the tender age of nine I was on top of one of my buddy’s gleefully humping his sweaty ass in the Florida heat inside our fort when the combination of sweat and precum (I wouldn’t start squirting for real till I was ten) lubed his eager little ass enough for my dick head to slide into him. I froze in fear that I was going to hurt him but he just moaned and pushed back on my dick. I continued to fuck him till we moved away a few months later. It was very near to the same time that a little girl in the neighborhood let me rub my dick all over her pussy. I got the end of it in but she said it hurt so we stopped. It wouldn’t be until I was 17 that I’d actually ejaculate in a pussy.

  22. Steve

    I’m relating the time I first gave up my ass. It was quite an eye-opener (opened other parts too LOL). I grew up in the deep south and was borderline homophobe, but found myself living in San Francisco (this was long ago, maybe at the very height of SF being the gay capital of the world). I had been dating a woman but the sex was not satisfying, and when I finally broke up with her was very horny. On a lark, I went to the nude beach there. COLD water. I was just wading, facing out to the sea and someone splashed me. I turned around to see this gorgeous hunk of a man, with a LARGE cock even though hanging soft. He said he liked my ass– never been told that before then. Long story short- we talked, I could not wait to see the cock hard. We met that night at his place, drank some wine and eventually were in the bedroom. After some play he said he wanted to screw me. I started laughing!! I had not even THOUGHT of it before then. I said “there’s no way you could get that in me!” But he said he knew what he was doing…so after lots of fingering, he did me..and I was AMAZED. It just changed me forever– I was that much in love with it. His cock to this day is the biggest I’ve ever SEEN much less experienced. I went from nearly homophobe to thinking about how I was going to tell my parents of my change. We screwed over the next month or so, but I was slated to leave SF and did, and quickly returned to having women, not men. Wasn’t with another man for about 10 years. But I never forgot how good that first time was.

  23. steamy4u99

    My very first sexual experience involved another guy. As I recall, I was 13 at the time. It was my 17 year old neighbor. He was an only child and his parents worked so every afternoon after school I’d stop by his house. Lots of mutual oral and he loved to top me. My first female sexual experience was when I was 14 and she was 17 also. Interestingly, I used to tell her about the sex I had with my neighbor and she’d get so horny hearing about it. I knew then that I wanted to keep enjoying sex with both genders.

  24. Dan

    Hmmm, reading these makes me feel odd. I was 6 the first time for oral. My family and another family met up camping in Colorado. They had twin 6yo’s. My parents had a tent we put up and the 3 of us used the tent. We had been swimming one evening and went into the tent to get out of our suits. Jim had a boner and I touched it. Soon we all did and began stroking each other. I went to kiss his cock and it went into my mouth. And I naturally sucked and licked it. And yes, young boys do orgasm however there is no ejaculation. It would be 3 years till we came in each other’s mouth. By the end of that camping trip they were both fucking me nightly. We have never been with women and after 41 years we meet for a camping trip nearly every summer.

  25. William

    It was freshman year in college with this so called straight athlete. We were just hanging out in his room and talking. I hadn’t come to his room with that in mind because we were in the same economics class and I really just wanted his note. It was pure ‘porn’. He asked if I need a massage…so I thought, why not!. He asked me to lay on my stomach and stated.Next thing I know he flipped me over and started sucking my dick. He asked me to fuck him and I did…but came too quick to really enjoy.

  26. Brian o

    To a guy named Michael. I was 19 and he was in his 30’s. Actually I did say “stop” but he kept going, so it was a dad/son, rape, bait, and ohers all rolled in one. I met him a few times afterwards. I was naive. He would be amazed that I still look like I did back then. And my ass is still tight as hell,

  27. Steve

    I was 13 with a girl , I had 2 cousins we would go into the horse barn ,it all started when one of the horses started pissing one of the girls comented on the size of his cock and asked if mine was as big . Of course I showed them, one would suck me the other would sit on it that lasted about a year .
    With a guy I moved to a new city ,and had a neighbor up stairs always offering me a blow job 4 money I always needed money . They in turn introduced me to Richard whom liked me he was 27 I’m just16 I started fucking him.About 6months later he convinced me to let him fuck me . He was long n thick and not gentle at all and it wasn’t until recently i started exploring the idea of trying it again . Im now 58

  28. Frank

    First blow job was a swimmer friend in high school. I was 17 he was 16. Was dating a Mormon girl and so sex was not gonna happen there. So we met in the school bathroom. I blew him first. 9.5 inches. Still the largest cock I have ever had in my mouth…. I was so nervous, my mouth was dry and my legs were shaking. But soon the saliva flowed, and we had an awesome time. After he came in my mouth, he blew me. We met a few more times, tried 69 and rimming. But then I went off to college…. saw him a few more times on breaks. We would tell each other about guys we had hooked up with….
    First had sex with a woman at 20. First fucked a guy at 25. He picked me up at a bar in New Orleans. Kept buying me beers and then we went back to his apartment. He liked to use a whole stick of butter for lube. Had his head out the window for a little as I fucked him doggy style, then we went back to his bed.
    I lost my anal virginity just about five years ago. Had found a college kid who was a varsity wide receiver at a Catholic school. Looked like a young Tom Brady. So enthusiastic. First time we met in his dorm, we did just about everything but fuck. He said he had fucked before though… So the next time we met in a different dorm room, and and I was on all fours and he was sucking me from behind and then began rimming me so intensely. (He is also a great deep throater…) He got my hole so wet, and then moved his crotch up and began to poke at the entrance of my ass. He asked if he could enter, and how could I say no? After several deep strokes, he said he preferred missionary…. (he was also on some cougar websites servicing older ladies), and so I turned over on my back and he held my legs up in the air and entered me and began to rock forward. It was such an awesome view looking up at this incredibly hot stud enjoying the fucking so much… We got together four or five more times, and every time after that he fucked me (with a condom…).

  29. Latinlust69

    My first oral was with a girl when I was 15. I remember that “The Curse of Fu Manchu” with Christopher Lee was on and that pussy is awful. First bj was after class with a guy in his station wagon in the planetarium parking lot. The first time as a bottom was not by choice and hated it at 19 but stayed a bb bottom for years. First time as a top was at 20 just off the dance floor at Man’s Country with a roadie for a band I love. Was a hot publc fuck, but still stayed a bb bottom.

  30. Mark

    I started with my cousin when we were both around 10. Nothing real serious. Then by the time I was 11 to 13 we lived across the street from a city park, and you could see the rest-rooms from our living room bay-window. Every night after supper from spring till late fall when the city would lock-up the rest-rooms up for winter I’d be over there all the time sucking and jacking off men. Some were just older teen-age boyz, and some were older (no doubt) some married men, and I was getting fucked too. I loved it…………..I still would walk through there during the winter months, and guys would see me and pick me up, and we would do it in their warm cars. In the spring, summer, and late fall though you couldn’t keep me out of the dam park. I have many, many fond memories of some great cocks, and cum-loads from over there. I would say in the hundreds over many years. I’m now 60 and still HIV negative. Can you believe?

  31. S A

    With a guy – we were both 13 and discovered each other orally for 12 years. It wouldn’t be until I was 48 that my ass was penetrated by a man and I have yet, at 52, to top a man. With a woman, 27.

  32. west

    My first time with a man was when I was 12. He was in his late 40s. I worked in a little corner store stocking shelfs. He was always drinking from a flask and one day he let me taste his drink. After a few hours of sipping from the flask it was time to close the shop. I was taking out the garbage and was pretty buzzed and quite unstable. he said I should rest for a while on his cot in the back room. I remember falling a sleep only to be awaken by a 200lb old man with bad breath on top of me. I tried to fight him off of me with very little success. He pulled my shorts off in a rage like fashion and flipped me over and held me down with his knees on my shoulders. I could barely breath with him holding me down. He rubbed my ass and my butt hole with spit then ripped it to pieces fingers and then his tool. The pain was unreal! After he finished he acted like nothing happened. I got dressed and ran out the back door. I thought I would never go back but he owed me a few days pay. After a week or so I went back for my money with no intentions of working for him anymore but there was something about the feeling I got when he was pounding my little bottom. It kinda turned me on. The next summer I went to work for him again and he grabbed my ass while I was behind the counter. I got a major boner just thinking about him doing it again. A few days passed and when I went to work he told be that he signed a lease for the barber shop next store and was going to start cutting hair again. One day after the barber shop opened he told me he would give me a free hair cut after we close the store. I stayed late that day and he gave me a decent hair cut. After the cut he was dusting the hair off the back of my neck and told me to take off my shirt so he could finish cleaning me up. He then started kissing the back of my neck and my back and gave me another hard on. We both got naked and made our way to the cot in the back room. There was a lot of oral and anal that evening but this time it was consensual. Was my first time rape? Yes. Did I like it? Yes! but not as much as the many times after that first encounter.

  33. matt

    I was nine, me and my two cousins would always mess around one of them was 11 other 13 one of the times we messed around my 13 yr old cousin managed to slide inside me butt he came pretty quickly, we fucked for about a yr after that I been hooked ever since haha

  34. Jay

    Lost my virginity to a female at 18 ex gf who I enjoyed it but I always wanted to try a guy. I knew I was submissive so I met a guy on Craigslist we talked he on and off I started a new job and the day I started I got off went home and there he was I was nervous he pulled his dick out and it was 8.5-9 inches he fucked me so good that that’s all I want now I want a nice hard dick in me!

  35. Dennis

    I was 17 when my 26 year old track coach gave me my first blow job. His was also the first cock I sucked and the first ass I fucked. On my 18th b’day he took my cherry. Forty years later, all I can say is….Thanks, Mr. J!

  36. Thug

    I hit the ground running with my little boner in my fist trying to find somebody to share it with… Hey!… Look at this!!!… I’ll show you yours if you show me mine!… Let’s get nekkid! I was incorrigible. Got my little ass whupped a lot for it too… still trying to get over that.

    I was humping heinie and bumping dick heads as far back as I can remember. I can remember pre pre-school sessions in the tall grass in the woods behind my house.

    I’ve never been all that picky as to gender but for pure, raw, animal sex there’s not much hotter than two full-grown, fully aroused men taking their pleasure from each other.

    First anal boy penetration was when I was 9 one sweaty Florida afternoon when my enthusiastic butt humping of my buddy resulted in accidental penetration. I was startled and afraid I’d hurt my buddy but he just moaned contentedly and encouraged me to continue… I’ve been fucking boy butt ever since.

    I don’t think it was much more than a week either side of that the first time I drug my excited little penis between vaginal lips. My legs still buckle under the excitement of that.

    I had a Mercury Space Program/NASA Astronaut pair of overalls under which I wore only my first jock strap… I felt like such a stud! I was a threat to the virtue of my communities. I got very adept at how quickly and often I could convince playmates to give me reason to peel out of even that.

    Wanna play Doctors? Let me take your temperature with my special thermometer.

  37. James

    I’m 33 and still a virgin. It first started out as wanting to wait for love. About 23 I found that out to be just not realistic. I then created a list of qualities that I wanted my first to have, well, that list eventually just got shorter and shorter. I soon cane up with an excuse of wanting to lose weight before losing the big V. I’ve had many offers, especially once guys find out Im still a virgin, but I always find a reason not to. I think now it’s just pure fear. I’m in no rush, and oral sex seems to suffice for the time being, I’ve actually become quite the expert at giving oral sex. When the time is right im sure it will happen.

  38. Skip

    I was in 7th grade and my cousins ex husband who was about 27 asked me to go camping with him . We went to this secluded place called turtle creek . It was a great place to camp by the water with a tire and rope swings … when we got there he told me he had forgotten his swim trunks so he said why don’t we just go naked . One thing led to another and he ended up sucking my dick and made me cum for the first time then we went to bed and he eat my ass then fucked me bb all night … it’s 40 years later and every time he sees me at a family function he makes an excuse for me to take him somewhere and he still likes suck me and eating my ass and I always leave with a load of his cum in my willing ass

  39. arthur

    it was the summer of 1972 I gave my virginity to my sisters boy friend. I was 12 hes was 17 and when he popped my cherry it hurt so good I was so dam afraid that I just knew my family could tell. there was blood all over in my underware. but that didn’t stop me from letting him have he way with me again. soon after that I guess he felt bad and he never talked to me again. but the funny part is he ended up marrying in to the family. he now my uncles brother in law on his wifes side

  40. Toto

    Technically my ass still a virgin at 33 ha. First time I topped was when I was 19. Was with a guy I met on MySpace (shreik). Was the best guy ever. We ended up being FBs for years.

  41. Terry

    I was 19 years old. We started messing around with penetration and I finally got it in because I’m not exactly small lol


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