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Dating : 7 Reasons Why Dating Older Men Is Hot

If you’ve dated men of different ages, you probably have an idea about the differences of dating older men and younger men. But for those gay men who try their best to stay only within their own age range? – It’s a great time now to open yourself more to trying out older dates.

Here’s what to expect when dating older men.

Difference Between Dating Older Men Versus Younger Men:

 

  1. They know themselves.

They have been there, done that, they have seen a lot more things in this world, thus they are careful not to make the same mistakes again. They know themselves more compared to the boys in their twenties and they know their boundaries. They are wise and mature and will also inspire you to find yourself. This helps your relationship flourish.

If, on the other hand, you want to discover yourself with someone also (still) trying to figure themselves out, go for a younger date. You can embark together on self-discovery.

 

  1. Older men have a lot more to talk about during conversations.

They know more about life, so often they can hold a conversation much longer. They simply have a lot more things to talk about based on the wealth of their experiences. Yes, there are also younger men who’ve already had a lot of great adventures, but older men can add more depth into a conversation than just the usual “We did this last week—it’s awesome!” You simply can learn more things dating an older guy.

As with the younger men, they are great if you often just want to skip the talk, or, if you are not much of a chatterer yourself.

 

  1. Compared to younger men, older men are better at sex.

Let’s face it. Gay men (all men), no matter what age, have great appetite for sex. But the key difference between older men and younger men is that the oldsters care a lot (more) about emotional connection. It adds a whole new dimension to sex. Sure, there are younglings too that like to have sex with emotional connection, but generally speaking, older guys tend to view sex more than just getting off on a regular basis. Plus, they also know more about the different deets of doing the deed. (They have already tried a lot of things.)

As with younger men, you can do it without having to worry about commitment.

 

  1. They have found their purpose and they want you, too.

Because they have already found their purpose in life, they live their lives with meaning. They spend their every second, breathe their every breath, fulfilling their purpose. But also part of this mission is to try to also bring their love up to their level of wisdom. An older guy would want you to find your purpose too, and he will always be there for you to lift up your spirits when you are feeling lost. That is really what it is like dating a man with more experience and wisdom.

As with the lads, they may not be the wisest, but you can sure appreciate that they are fun to be with and also genuine with how they want to live their lives.

 

  1. Older men don’t waste their time with the wrong people anymore.

This could mean you will not meet a lot of different people in an older man’s life, but only because he no longer keeps a lot of ‘unnecessary’ friends in circle. He is much more laid back in meeting or hanging out with other people, focusing only on the people he really wants to be with. You will often find older men to have better quality close relationships and they will always fight for what is right—for what they believe in. They are not mere followers.

Dating younger men, on the other hand, often introduces you to all sorts of different people—all types of people both the good and the bad—which is great if you are still in that stage of meeting people or if you just want to play things “cool.”

 

  1. Older men don’t sweat the small stuff.

Having more distinctive personalities though doesn’t mean they are argumentative, which is not the case at all with older, wiser males. You can trust that they don’t sweat the small stuff. They have learned well enough that dwelling on the small things only wastes energy and makes matters worse so they just focus on the more important things. Expect that when you date or get into a relationship with an older man, you will learn to mature as well and learn to forgive and forget the little things.

With the younger males, well, you’ll find that you’ll still have a lot of growing up to do. You will have to battle a lot of arguments but in the end if you survive all of them, hopefully, it could still be worth it.

 

  1. Older men have survived a lot more heartaches.

Truth be told, older men have their own share of heartaches and relationship mistakes; but this also means they also have had several opportunities to redeem themselves. They have learned a lot from their past relationships (they have really learned how to set themselves straight), making them better lovers (actually, better persons) than their younger counterparts.

With older males, you can rest assure they are for keeps and probably in for the long haul, too; with younger men you may yet find yourself facing a lot more relationship woes. It doesn’t mean though you may not survive them all—together.

 

So, who do you think you prefer to date?—Older men or younger men?


There are 53 comments

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  1. Mereceptor

    You’re living in a dream world. Older men, unless they have perhaps the luxury to retire early cannot live their purpose. We have to live the drudgery of our everyday lives.
    We get to look at the young being able to stay out late and have a blast and know that will never be us again. Never mind the young won’t even give us a second look.

    Older men may also go with the wrong person if they find them attractive.

    • TiredOfIt

      I wouldn’t touch a Millennial with a ten foot pole. Self-centered, ADHD to the max, drug-addicted, who knows WHAT panoply of bugs they carry. I played with a couple, couldn’t WAIT to dump them. They’re also PAINFULLY lacking in social graces and have no clue as to history, either gay community or on a borader scale. Who needs the aggravation? I sure as hell don’t. Oh…and yes…they’re ALL about the MONEY, honey…and they’re NOT getting that from ME!

      • Jay1

        You are 100% right. I use to love young guys back in the day, but not any longer. Everything you addressed is 100% true. Even if you have the MONEY and don’t mind spending it, it’s still all about games to them. Most look older than the older guys they dislike, can’t preform, and are plain idiots. And btw, what are they going to do when they become “old” men in their 30’s, 40’s 50’s, etc? Stop liking men? Turn straight? Become sexless?

      • TChristopher1

        Well. I totally agree about the gay history bit…..It’s so sad that so many young guys barely even know about Stonewall, most less any of the basic details, and even fewer know about the San Francisco riots…..and if you asked any of them “are you a friend of Dorothy?”, they wouldn’t know what the hell you’re talking about…..and it’s very sad that they don’t know or even care about our bar and club culture, such as the different colored hankies, or what it means to wear your keys on the left or right….not to mention all of our incredibly wonderful bar music of the past….most of the young guys only care about hip-hop (gag me with a maggot)……….It’s been said that if you take away peoples past, you take away their future.

        • Frank

          You mention gay history and it’s all about the bars and clubs, the old disco bar music. That’s not what all gay men are about. Sure I went out, but I always found it to be way too loud, too crowded and damned expensive. There’s a lot more to gay history than just the bars. Sure Stonewall was a bar in NYC that the NYPD raided, but the San Francisco riots were about a LOT more. Those were about us being able to be US. If you want to learn about gay history besides what side you wear your keys on and what the hanky colors mean, which most younger guys could really care less about (I’m 50 and still don’t know all the hanky colors). The gay community has evolved like rest of the world.

          There’s a group in Saint Louis that has put together a very comprehensive history of STL. Don’t remember the website, but you can Google it.

      • Jay

        Born in 1980 here so I have less harsh thoughts on Millenials. Good notes are that they are really open and accepting to changes. I think they are extremely direct and love to call you out which is a plus to me. It’s always amazing how they view limits as negatives and how they question everything. As far as fitness goes, they are definitely into looking great and flaunting it which is where the clash comes in. Negatives mainly center on how much the physical dominates their lives. They are addicted to themselves in a sense and if todays technology was introduced to other generations at the same age in life then most behavior would be similar if not worse. This is the Millenial physical prime of their youth. So much is laid out easily to them especially those that have become Justins, Taylors, or Ri Ri. We hear about those nonstop but there is also a population of Millenials that have completed college by age 20 and some even younger. I’ve met some and they are the ones that will take the reigns even though right now they are working their way up and figuring out life like every other generation has.

  2. ownerofharry

    I love my old man. He cares about me more genuinely than any young I have been with. He’s invested in my happiness. And may I debunk the theory that older men don’t want or avoid healthy sexual relationships. His libido is stronger than mine!

    • Aaron

      I don’t think that’s true overall. But older guys recognize a game faster and can flip it back on the person better if they want.

    • Jay

      Agree. It hard to find a guy that manipulates in a masculine way vs the bitchy approach most guys take. Seems most older guys will end most disputes with sex until they’re ready to move on to the next. Males

  3. Bob Hartner

    Interesting article. I am a living testament to the fact that it does work! I am 57 and my boyfriend is 27. We have been together 5 years. We are soulmates and inseparable. We both work hard and play hard. I am not a sugar daddy by any means.

    • mikiebad1

      Please be careful…I was exactly in your same shoes….I was 53…he 26…..I put him through his last three years of Drexel University. After 5 years and $ 125,000 toward our home (which surprise I put solely in his name) he woke up one morning and on my way to work informed me the locks had been changed and I no longer met his needs….suicide seemed the only escape from the total decimation I experienced…thank God I had friends who got me through the darkest time of my life….come to find out….he had cheated on me numerous times and contracted H.I.V. … After 18 months I still test clean….and will NEVER enter into a relationship with ANYONE who is not within 3 years of my age!!!!!!

  4. Gaymer

    2 maybe 7 yup the rest depends a lot on their personality and personas. I have met plenty of older men that have very little to talk about and cant hold a conversation to save their life at least not in person. What is worse is they cannot relate at all to younger guys bc the technology divide, gen x barely is able to relate to millennials, you think a baby boomer is able to keep up with me when i start talking about what the specs are on my gaming computer. Or how the ps vs xbox rivalry is effecting the gaming market. i barely keep up with it myself when im talking to my friends what hope does a middle aged or older man have of keeping up with or understanding something that is so quintessential to my life. Most older men i have dated basically get intimidated by me so much for knowing ones self or not sweating the small stuff. and no I dont date other gamers exclusively i date alot of people but they need to understand that gaming is a part of my life and atleast have some appreciation for it beyond i remember playing pac man on the atari.

    • Not Surprised

      Your post tells exactly how immature younger men (people) can be. If gaming/PS/xBox are “quintessential to (your) life”, you have a lot of growing up to do.

      • TiredOfIt

        Forget him and his kind…they’re brainwashed by gaming, cell phones and instant gratification. I find them boring and they tend to be leeches.

      • Gaymer

        the fact you don’t understand the revolution that gaming has provided to the world in the sense of technology, health, exploration, programming, as well as cultural and societal changes that have occurred bc of the gaming community shows just how out of touch older men are. Go to youtube there is an entire section dedicated to gaming there isn’t one for gays or many other cultures but gaming demands its own catergory. The Gaming industry employees millions more thru the secondary groups like streamers and conventions and so so much more. You scoff at something you truly don’t understand and can’t bc your view gaming as childish and immature and prove my point to the T. Oh and just for a point of reference I work for an online magazine covering new game releases as well as said conventions and the developing technology as well as am often on panels discussing the practical applications of technology developed to entertain. its my employment and thus is quintessential to my life.

        • ComputerGeek

          I’m a GenXer that fully understands gaming consoles, and what the specs are on your gaming PC. But, it seems that’s all you’re interested in–technology. If you get off the couch and away from your “toys,” you’ll find out there’s much more to life than the latest RPG or overclocked CPU.

          You’ve pigeonholed yourself into a gaming-only world, and obviously lack the maturity level to engage in other activities that would put you in touch with more people.

          When I was younger, I still went for older guys–because of the maturity level. Yours is still in high school.

          • TChristopher1

            I totally agree with Computergeek, and Tiredofit, and Not Surprised……It’s ok to be really into something like gaming, but like all things in life, it must be kept in proportion….and in this case, it seems to be totally out of control. The world of “games” only exists on a computer chip….yes, there’s all the ancillary stuff that goes with it like magazines and conventions, but it’s like building a skyscraper on top of a thimble….what’s on the computer chip is only virtual…it isn’t real…it’s only ones and zeros, and even they aren’t real….so, you take away the ones and zeros and everything else collapses.
            Life is full of so much wonder, it’s beyond tragic to base one’s life on things that don’t exist (it’s a lot like religion really)……I have things that I’m really into as well, but I don’t let those interests literally consume and control my life….and I don’t expect to find a guy who has the exact same interests as I do….but then, that’s part of the beauty of a relationship and being in love with another guy….you both learn from each other, and you learn to love the things he loves because it’s part of him, and he does the same for you….the point is….you put your man first above all else, and the other stuff in your life (like gaming) comes second.

      • CCTXtoCLEOH

        Gaming is essentially the activities of whatever the older generation was into during their time which I’m sure your older peers at the time seen as a waste of time. Another prime example of why older men are not compatible with the younger generation. Head to the bar and see how many older men are still single, leeches, bitter, catty and still have no clue what to do with their lives and don’t have their shit together. I know far more younger guys who are more successful than older men and even have a stronger retirement and investment portfolio going.

        • ComputerGeek

          Unless you’re making a living from gaming, you’re just playing a game. You seem to be in the same boat as GAYMER–you limit yourself only to those who also play console or PC games.

          You both have a condescending attitude towards those who aren’t part of your “community” of gamers.

          Your maturity level speaks volumes.

        • versabottom4top

          I got news for you, EVERY older generation generally feels like the younger generations are headed for ruin and failure. It’s been that way for eons. It’s not a prime example of anything other than human nature. Head to the bar? Gay or straight, young or old, most people that hang out in bars are losers and misfits otherwise they’d have someplace else to go. You probably know more successful younger guys than older guys because you use a bar as a research lab. Most older folks have enough sense to stay out of them and the younger ones haven’t all figured that out yet. Tell me how all those well invested kids do when the next bond or stock market collapse comes along. Been there, done that, got the margin calls, and still a fairly well off older redneck queer.

        • Michael

          Yes how I relate. How as a 23 year old am I always seeing the older generation being so bitter and jaded. But yet preach how us younger people are a mess. Its hypocritical because if ur older n have wisdom to show then help the young (help not baby) so u are not creating a monster. But also that’s the reason that there is a divide between us and them period. There has to be a revolutionary change if we are to see eye to eye again …Just saying

  5. sexyslimdreads

    9. A lot of yall sound like bitter bitches. There are benefits to both young and old. In the end, it all boils down to maturity – social and emotional.

    • TiredOfIt

      …which Millennials and GenYers do NOT have, in spades. Cute to look at on the go-go-boy platform, that’s about it. Give me a night on the town with a bunch of the old crowd, I’m ALL good. Twinks in my bed? FAHGEDDABOUDIT!

  6. Ricknjaxfl

    Most older men I have met have strong sex drives and great lovers. Some of course are duds like any others. Older guys give the best head by far.

  7. What????

    I have mostly dated older men and I mainly date older guys because younger guys or guys my age are intimidated by me because I am too gay for their taste. Older guys love me because they are impressed by my career and my good looks.

    I must say that point 7 applies to many of the older guys whom I’ve dated and that’s usually why we ended the relationship and point 2 I would say that some of the older gay guys I’ve dated talk a lot and they tend to repeat themselves often.

    Older gay guys lie a lot!

    I will continue to date older guys but it’s definately not because they tend to be better in bed!

    All in all I tend to like rich gay older men because an older gay man struggling to make ends meet indicate a gay man who never got his shit together, and I detest broke men!

    Let’s not forget that many older gay men have damage to the brain from drug and alcohol abuse and many of them think unrealistically when it comes to sex and they often lie about being a top! Most older gay guys are true bottoms and those old holes can take a bit of getting used to.

    I know that you are trying to get the older guys some play with this blog but I would say that every younger guy who is considering being with an older guy should precede with caution!

    So if you like older guys, over 50 be prepared to have to wash them down because the naturally stink and also to deal with their stubbornness because they do, “sweat” the small stuff!

    As a matter of fact I’m sick of older guys, “Off with their heads!”

  8. Kev

    Are you joking, that may be true in Orlando places but it’s for damn sure not true in Orlando, these older guys don’t know where the hell they are going, they get with younger so they feel younger but usually have to pay for it, they sneak around to hook up with the friends of who they are already with and then will drop you and for what I have seen I don’t see why young boys here even get with older guys when hardly any have anything going for themselves and the only thing they have to talk about is sex.

  9. Thomas

    I’m 67 years old. Here lately I have been hit on these gay sites by men young enough to be my sons and grandsons. After a few emails, they want money. I make it plain that I live on Social Security and twelve hundred dollars can only go so far. I trust a man my age better than these young bucks.

  10. Mojo

    So many points are true but its not all pros dating an older guy. Many of them are clingy, controlling and want to tie you down because they have been there and done that.
    They are usually insecure about infidelity, they feel threatened by their younger counterparts and may become overbearing.
    Its sometimes hard to connect with them on trendy stuff. They usually have old, corny ideas and tastes. Some guys may put up with it for the luxury of financial help or stability that usually comes with most older men.
    Some are very manipulative and want younger men for sex toys. Some will just use you.

  11. Glen

    Always went after older guys when I was young pup cruzin for cock and still prefer those older or near my age. They have less drama and experience in sex whether it oral or good ol fashion fuckin. They are more stable and more likely have a car, job and own place and not lookin to be a guy lookin for handout.

  12. pride1

    I have always liked older more mature men since I was a teenager. They just always appealed more to me. Now that I am one of them I like men my own age. The mature man has always been hot as far as I am concerned.

  13. Rich

    I am happily in my 50s, have a great partner of 16 years. We have an open relationship, but don’t find much need to take advantage of that. I have been with men both older than me and younger than. I definitely don’t sweat the small stuff and have quite a happy life. So I think it’s a huge generalization to say that older men are somehow pining away for young guys and lost youth. I don’t want anyone who doesn’t want me. I have more self respect than that!!

  14. JoeyGuyNextDoor

    Ive been with all ages of men since my early teens. There are idiots and users at all stages of life. I met a 19 yo guy and it was as if we knew each other for a thousand years. Its about the connection not the age difference. I look at my interaction with younger guys as paying it forward for a generation that did not have to fight for the rights we recently enjoy. A friend (of any age) is a friend, tricks come and go.

  15. Kevin

    I don’t think Dave actually writes these blogs–the ones that have any substance anyway. I think he just looks for articles online and then copies and pastes them

  16. AV

    I recently moved to a new town, and I’m quite surprised how many young guys hit on me online…and I mean hardcore pursue me. Its very flattering and its hard to say no when a really good looking guy initiates contact, is sending you lots of messages and genuinely seems interested. I might pause if he is 20 and I’m in my 40s, but it is hard to pass up the attention…especially when I didn’t get the time of day from most guys 20 years ago.

  17. Aaron

    LOL there are so many generalizations in the comments. Older gay guys don’t know how to follow a conversation about computers? Come on. I understand a conversation about gaming computers, Xbox One, playing Destiny and what not. I can talk about which song is hot on the radio and how sad it was that Judy Garland never really saw any of the money she made Goldwyn – Meyer while drinking a cocktail, glass of good wine, glass of BAD wine or whatever. it’s just about staying up to date with pop culture and what people find value in. It takes some work but it can be done. Also I have plenty of younger friends who would never ask me for money because they know I value work. But ill use my connections to get them a job. We’re humans, we come in as much variety as anything. Generally, though, I like guys in my age bracket or a little older. But I’m only 39 so I’m never sure if that’s “older” unless you’re 21.

  18. Daddy Dater

    I think the youngest guy I ever dates was 40. LOVE older men, they always have a place, they’re hot in bed.
    1 time I went on a dae with a 26yo, he stred at his phone most of the time, ugh never again.
    Older men for me

  19. kevin

    I don’t think this is fair. I’m 60 and wouldn’t mind dating a 30 something. The gay male community has swung a full 180 over the years and have become age phobic to the younger men. Give everyone a chance and don’t stereotype.

  20. DeAndre L Harris

    This blog just sounds like an opportunity for older guys to bash and shame younger guys, and vice versa.
    I get that everyone has their experiences that shape their opinions, But come on guys.!!!!!!
    Let’s not take a blog topic and turn it into a judge-a-thon.
    To be honest a lot of older guys comments come off as jaded and bitter towards younger guys.
    Like…..
    It’s just too much….

  21. Brian

    I like older guys because I just do. Not because they’re mature, or know what they want. A good deal of older guys still are lost, so you can’t say that they have seen their fair share of this and that and have overcome it, because some still haven’t.

    I like them because some (not all) aren’t into rushing things.

  22. OldGuy

    Are you serious? Sounds more like a fantasy. Most of this is more a dream than reality. Is this supposed to be from your personal experience? OMG

  23. Goldenloverinmym

    hi guys, I am one of the older daddies, I have been with YOUNG guys 19 yrs old, and guys older 72 yrs young and my age and have good and bad experiences with both groups. Some of the best sex ever was with a guy 10 yrs younger, he taught me how to enjoy sex with a man and taught me many things i still love to do to this day. It is all about the connection i get with the person if the sex is good then the other things will fall into place. if they dont then i move on. No bad blood or ill will

  24. Matt

    My first experience with an older man came when I was 14. I didn’t have any money so I was out at the park and scared out of my mind. I’d had sex with boys my age so I wasn’t a blushing virgin, but I was scared about choosing to be a boy for hire.

    “Sam” wasn’t looking for a boy, but he sensed I was nervous so he approached me and we went to his car. He asked if I was hungry; I was, so he took me to a Dennys for food. He gave me some money when he dropped me off a block from my home. He also gave me his number.

    We repeated this scenario for a few weeks and it was I who opened the topic of having sex, which he was reluctant to do. I’ve always been a rough hung top and he liked that I made him walk funny. That was 16 years ago and I still fuck him regularly.

    He put me through college and trained me in his business holdings and now I pretty much run his businesses.

    The sex has always been good, but the mentoring and guidance I got from him was tremendous. I did not have a father and the adults in my family were worthless, so I got lucky.

    He’s approaching 80 and I think I’ve made him younger and more alive, or at least I hope I gave as much as I got.

  25. ??

    I would like to date an older Gentlemen I had one deception. But that is a long story which I will share with you soon enough. But I love well season men mature gray hair men. Why because they have live they know right from wrong they are better at sex. Who ever says otherwise is a fool and has not experience it. They can kiss and know exactly how to talk to you and make anyone fall in love. Plus they are big cuddlers which I love it doest not matter what the age difference is. Like my boo Aaliyah once said “Age Ain’t nothing but a number”. I don’t discriminate eather so to all of your Gay men who don’t like older men you are missing out…

  26. Dave

    I never date men under 40. They can’t stop looking at their phones!

    A 26yo asked me out and almost the ENTIRE time he texted his friends in front of me. I was like why the fk did you ask me out?
    90 fking minutes of talking to someone who is staring at his phone.

    I was so annoyed. Mature men have the decency and the brain cells to know not to do this.
    A 2 minute text to your friend/mom/whatever to let them know where you are is fine.
    But the entire time? You are rude, dont ask me out again.

  27. Dean Kg

    One needs to be very fit, extremely attractive, well educated, and financially stable with a great personality for me to consider dating them. If the person doesn’t meet any of these requirements, age is immaterial. That being said, several older guys I have met don’t fit the bill.


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