Speak Out : Dammit, Another Bottom!
While surfing A4A I noticed one profile that included the statement, “Dammit, another Bottom!” I don’t know the background of that statement, but evidently the guy (a bottom) is feeling a lack of action because there are so many bottoms in play! Admittedly, a random sampling of A4A often profiles finds more bottoms and versatile bottoms on-line than tops.
Why do we seem to have more bottoms than tops ready for action? Any ideas, guys?
Anonymous
I believe as homosexual men, we first fall in love with the dick. We love masculinity also which correlates with dominance.I would also like to add that getting that prostate massaged feels so much better than fucking sum ass…well in my opinion.
I think it’s because a lot of guys are finding themselves wanting it as well. I must admit that I am Bi. But when I’m with a guy I want to be very nasty and slutty. I want to do it all. Although I am mostly top, when I am intoxicated I find myself wanting to bottom and be dominated. Also a lot of guys like the feeling of being taken. Life calls many of us to always so be on the aggressive side. In control of things. So in the Gay world that isn’t the case. We have an option. Be the aggressor or be aggressively taken. And frankly not be judged. As long as our partner at the time orgasm and has a good time that’s all that matters.
More bottoms than tops? Doesn’t look that way in my area…. Herds of guys claiming to be 110% tops… and a smaller group of bottoms largely consisting of skinny effeminate white poofter boys, or effeminate men of color who all seem to think being 80+ pounds overweight is “just a little thick”.
Where are you located, im moving.!!
What town do you live in? Everyone where I live claims to be a top. It’s next to impossible to find a bottom here.
no problem with that !!! total top here
So true more btm than tops especially on Guam lol
I have no idea, but I never complain. Ever…
My opinion is I use to be versatile but preferred to bottom. I had medical problems using the bathroom so after I got well, I decided to top exclusively. I find that unless you find a aggressive bottom, top is more work and requires me to stay in good physical shape to perform effectively. Almost like a vigorous workout if I’m really horny and really into a hot bottom.
Well I am honestly over bottom.I think there are more bottoms because most men feel less of a man because thay are gay and they don’t really understand what being gay is so they really don’t understand themselves.so there way of dealing with this is take dick,which is very painful if the guy don’t know what he is doing.I am 100%gay never been with a woman in my life,I am not a bottom but others think I am just by looking at me.people have in there mind what a man should look like,thay never think don’t judge a book by cover,I am a top and I fuck men and enjoy it.I feel that if you not in a relationship you should not give up the cookies so I don’t.I have some feminine tendencies but I love f****** so call men I guess my reason for this is because I have a fat dick.I enjoy a good heterosexual Bottom we’ll how thay think thay are still a heterosexual just because that can blend in with others I feel sorry For these types of Bottoms cause thay are ashamed of who thay are or living a lie to there wives this opening them up for many problems.being a bottom or a man that like taken Dick also should know how to clean there ass hole if you going to take dick, I do hate shit on my dick.if you going to be a bottom learn how to clean yourself out.or I will.
Why so many bottoms? Because it feels AMAZING to have my ass filled with a thick cock going balls deep over and over. Especially if it’s a 6-7″ thick dick.
That’s it!
Why not just enjoy getting naked, and see what happens. Top or bottom doesn’t have to be the definition of fun when i am involved.
What I have found on here not a shit ton of bottoms but it seems alot of bottoms think they need multiple profiles I talked to one guy this weekend found three different profiles all the same person worst with him one said he was a top one said he was a bottom and one versatile so we have a few on here that don’t know what they are or want
As a top, I’m glad there is a cornucopia of bottoms around. I think many guys find it hard to keep an erection, even young guys. Not sure if its all the soy that’s added to almost everything we eat and for some reason especially in so called health conscious foods. Soy turns to estrogen in a man’s body and in increased amounts can lead to all kinds of things of which we men may not be cognizant. Bottoms both young and my age comment on the rigidness of my cock when I’m making love to them. The Paleo diet and other non soy containing food course regimens may help with the hardness of a cock but nothing will get rid of the choice of a guy who wants a cock in his ass and loves that feeling, no more than I’m willing to give up the feeling of sliding inside a guy and making love that way. Bottom does nothing for me, topping is heavenly. I find most bottoms want a guy to take control, not dominate, but just take control and they can feel free to release their passions then.
It’s because guys like me who are married and see how much fun it is for a woman to take a dick so we want to try it. Admittedly, I haven’t yet but that’s because guys don’t seem to know how to seduce a guy who hasn’t ever had dick in the ass yet.
Good question. There does seems an over supply of bottoms but as a top, there’s never an issue with me getting laid. I’m in heaven with all the willing bottoms out there ready to get fucked.
Ditto! I wanna know the answer to that question. I also find many flakes. WTF?
I have no idea, you would think it would be the other way around since bottoming hurts lol. I guess more guys are into being in the submissive roles.
I think it’s because once a man takes it in the rear, they get lazy. They want someone to do all the work. There is 1 top to every ten bottoms. It’s frustrating as hell.
Not having done any extensive scientific surveying I would venture to say that more gay men than not enjoy being controlled if not outright used. I’ve read in places that black men who are on the down low will have a tendency to be more of a dom top because their wives and girl friends are generally very strong in the personality department so in order to have that feeling of control they, when bi, will turn to gay men who conversely feel that need to be controlled.
Latest stats indicate that 86% of all übergay (MSM exclusively) men are bottoms or mostly so. This plays into early 20th century psychiatric thought that “gay men really want to be women” that was said not to be true after “gay lib” in the early ’70s, which led to decriminalization and so on. Looks like they might have been right all along. OK, so much for what the cognoscenti have to say about this. My experience? The 86% figure is correct…there are VERY few gay men as tops. Bisexuals, different story altogether, which is mostly likely why they’re bisexuals. Another facet of this? Tweeked out übergays usually can’t get it up anyway, so to have sex of any kind, they have to put their legs up in the air, and meth abuse is a HUGE problem among übergays. A lot of “gay lib” psychological reasoning is going out the window, as it’s continuing to be disproven through scientific method.
I am a Total Top no Versatile flip or Flopping here. I wish that I could meet a few of the Real Sexy Bottoms. That was Real about getting some Real Clean Top Dick! So you sexy Bottom Boy’s get at this Top but be for Real, Right and Ready
24K Play.
Fuck me 24K!
I think part of is has to do with just how lazy people have become and/or fear of being judged. If you’re a top, it’s abundantly clear to the bottom if you are good at your technique whereas a bad bottom is like cold pizza i.e. still worth consuming.
Granted bottoms who just lie there and take the pounding are pretty boring to be with.
I would not want to be stuck in a relationship with a “dedicated” bottom because on occasion I like to bottom, but almost 10 out of 10 times I’m the top.
I have a couple of older men I fuck that used to be tops, but erectile dysfunction has had its way with them. Yeah they get hard with Viagra but not hard enough to successfully penetrate.
There are tops. People are just picky. It becomes a matter of what we prefer as individuals. We all want to have sex, but it’s the experience of the meet also.
I understand the frustration.
I certainly do not know the answer to your question, but I have wanted to start a discussion about the top & bottom thing for a long time. I am 57 & came out in 1977 during college. After college, I moved to Hartford, CT. & quickly became a regular at the dance clubs & became very sexually active. Back then, we went out every weekend, danced, met people face to face, and if we were lucky we found someone to go home with to have sex. The only difference was that the terms “Top” & “Bottom” were not used then, at least not in Hartford or anywhere else I went. You just went home with someone and had sex. I honestly can not remember exactly how or when it was brought up what each of us was into (we were too anxious to get our clothes off and get in bed), but it never seemed to present a problem – we just had fun! I don’t believe I heard the terms Top or Bottom until I moved to Los Angeles in the late 1980’s. I do not know when and where the usage of these labels started but my guess is that porn had a big part in the origin of being labeled as a top or bottom.
I still do not know what to call myself LOL When I was in my 20’s & 30’s, I did bottom frequently, but I also topped, as did most guys. During my second relationship it quicky became apparent to both myself & my partner that anal sex was not going to be part of our sex lives, which was fine with me since we were both more than satisfied without it! After we parted ways I made my way back into the club & sex routine. I tried bottoming a few times, but it either was too painful or just took too much time “preparing”. I have not bottomed since the late 1990’s, and I rarely top. So you can see why I have such a difficult time “labeling” myself as either a top or bottom. I think someone should come up with a third term for guys like me who limit their sexual activities to oral, rimming, making out & body contact!
IDK maybe b/c the Top(s) are “actually” fewer in number on the site because they are Bi D/L or otherwise in relationships. Maybe b/c bttms are better/more comfortable expressing/stating that they are looking for a connection. Maybe Bttms are posting more than one profile to better their odds against the others here.
I experience the same especially in the city I live in.
I’ve looked around other areas and the larger cities have more guys thus more tops to go around
LOW T treatment option suck and not cheap
Gay and bisexual men are comprised mostly of 80% bottoms/vers and 20% tops. Thems just the facts, Jack. As a friend of mine said, a vers top is a very picky bottom.
Well it would seem that with an abundance of hungry holes out there, tops might not need to really look that far in order to find a willing participant for some hot, sweaty, or steamy action, and therefore might not be as regularly online. In my personal opinion though, variety is the true spice of life, so nothing beats the functionality of being Versatile. In the end however a good find, top or bottom, is always great. Happy Hunting guys! Be safe, be kind to each other, and have a great day!
Because being gay is associated with being feminine ( whether we like that or not). For more guys they live a “macho” life and want to experience what it is like to give that up. Some guys like to seem macho but are actually super submissive. Everyone wants to try sucking a dick or getting fucked in the butt. More men seem to like it more than others, but i believe that is why we have so many bottoms. White ppl seem to think that black are good for nothing but dicking them down, thus, they all wanna be bottoms so that they can experience BBC. All in all does it really matter why there are so many bottoms?????? It is not as if people are going to read this and suddenly stop….Live and let live i say, A4A is doing nothing more than promoting the one thing you are speaking out against…..
I have found the same thing! Luckily for me – I am a top so I love it! Unfortunately for bottoms they find this very frustrating.
I think most gay guys by nature are submissive and want to be docile in bed. The bottoms I have discussed this with in detail tell me they want to have sex with a “Man”. Their definition of this was a masculine guy that will dominate them in bed and take an aggressive role. They find this very sexually attractive! The other caveat in being a bottom is they loved the feeling of a big cock massaging their prostate.
I have had sex with all types of bottoms and when asked those 2 things seem to be the most common responses. But there are all types of guys out there. I am just sharing my experiences.
I find I have hit the jack pot when I scroll through Adam and see a picture of a round, muscled, tight, ass and then it the profile it says “bottom”!!!! It’s a beautiful thing!
I mainly was top. I would always ask the bottom to be squeaky clean down there. That was a simple request that seemed to never get accomplished. Tired of getting shit on… I have switched to mainly bottom and practice what I preach. Squeaky cleaned out or it’s not happening.
Total bottom = Selfish hole / short shelf life -LOL
If you want the Gorgeous men LEARN HOW TO TOP.
As RETIREMENT PLAN – LEARN TO TOP – every year you get older the less chance you’ll get someone to Fuck you.
I consider my self average , but I’ve had beautiful men in my life because I am a Top, seriously I would never have had these men if I were a bottom.
Has a total bottom I say it depends on where you are! In the small town I live in lots of bottoms. When I work in or near the bigger city’s lots of good dick to chose from 😉 having a couple hot butt pics can help too.. I worked in Detroit a while ago, I got more dick than ever..
In my experience there are more bottoms, because they are lazy. After years of meeting them online, and finding that the expect you to walk in with a hard on, and fuck them without any kissing or foreplay, I decided to become a bottom. I only top a couple times per year, because I refuse to foster these cold, lazy, and most often methed out bottoms.
I’m hoping that this trend will end soon. Gay men need to learn to love, not just try to get their poprostates massaged.
I know a lot of people bottom because they’re tired of other bottoms having “accidents”. Granted, it will happen from time to time, but some people would rather make sure that they’re ready and bottom, than to have to play russian roulette and find out that the other person wasn’t.
Stephen has is right…there WAS no “I’m a top” and “I’m a bottom” until the pandemic wiped out a big chunk of the ’70s crowd and scared the bisexuals back home for good. It was the GenZ crowd post-AIDS that started all this “top/bottom” crap and the pigeonholing. That’s yet another reason why I avoid them like the plague.
I love how so many guys use these posts to crow about their prowess as a total top/bottom. Sorry guys, no one cares!
@ Stephen ..
Very interesting post . So much of what you said struck a chord . From the time line and then on an on .
Except for a few small detail differences , like location , we could be twins ! !
It’s true. I live in NYC and there are many more bottoms than tops. The reason ? Deep down most men want to take dick. The married guys have all fucking for years and now want to experience it. I personally am dealing with a couple of different bottoms. They are married and well hung all they want is to get on their knees ass up or put their knees by the ears and take it deep. To me that’s hot !
I don’t guess my penchant for getting tops to squirm on the end of my mighty sword and go: “Ungh, ungh, ungh,…” is helping ya’ll’s situation much.
Being a top, all the bottoms in the city I live in have such nasty picky attitudes that they’re not worth any effort hooking up with regardless of their age or stats.
As a total bottom it does seem like there are more bottoms then tops. My reason for being a bottom is because 1 through out my career I have had to be strong in appearance with a demanding role. After many hours and years of playing that role I want to relax and play the submissive or passive role and enjoy the man taking charge and taking what he wants. 2 because my cock is on the thin side and only 5 1/2 inches.
I no longer agree that being gay means your feminine as there are plenty of masculine guys that are gay and seems anyone thinking you have to have that so called limp wrist is just stereo-typing gays now days but that’s just my opinion.
…and why does bottom also have to mean that they don’t know what the inside of a gym looks like? Packing around enough to make a second small human, is not “a little extra” or “curvy”. man up.
Personally, I think that if I have learned to do and enjoy both topping and bottoming that everyone else should as well…unless they have a small penis, then that’s more like a handicap…
Yes, I agree that there in an over abundance of bottoms in general.
Why?
Someone else commenting really hit on it. “Inuyasha”
I agree with you Inuyasha.
Guys who have never even been with a guy or had sex before claiming to be a total bottom. WTF? How can one know that unless they actually try. And I say, Men are meant to FUCK!
So…Give it a try boys. You may realize that you are not that total bottom you thought you were.
Aghhhhhhhh!
Everyone has their own reasons. For myself, I’m not that sensitive in my penis and I have a small dick. It makes no sense to top.
I must say that I prefer a guy to be vers. I come across a lot of tops who want me to top them. It really depends on what the guy into.
My own personal observations of this phenomenon have come around more often on one reason than any other. Perceived Inadequacy, or the possible display of it. their Dick is too small, they cum too quick, they don’t satisfy their sex partner, they cant stay hard, or looking gross naked, they aren’t masculine or man enough… it will always be universally easier to avoid the causes of any shame or embarrassment, than to accept them and explore ways to manage or overcome them.
Growing up I had every single one of those “reasons” for preferring to bottom, and I was mostly content with it. But all it does is limit what you can actually achieve before you even get to try. Having personally accepted, handled, and long dismissed those “shortcomings” any hook-ups had better not arrive on my doorstep without their ass cleaned out, because this cock is going in there.
The problem is all the Below Average bottoms out there. Everyone calling themselves a bottom doesnt always mean their any good at it. In my estimation, “A Bottom” can often mean; to queenie to anyone to let them top. When it comes to being a Good Bottom, there is way more to it then just willingness. From everything from personality to questionable hygiene practices, you often have to ask…did you just End Up A Bottom????
When I am in a relationship I am vers but if I am just hooking up I prefer to bottom. To stressful to try to please a bottom. Either I cum to fast or don’t get hard because I am not that interested. As a bottom I can ride a good dick and stay nice and hard.
For myself, and from my own experience,
Every male (same sex oriented or opposite sex oriented)
is a bottom until proven otherwise.
Sadly, most if not all are bottoms. Whether it be the
physical detinition of a bottom, or the psychological definition.
I equate and define a true “top” as genuinely virile.
Never has been penetrated anally, and has ZERO
interest in whether a bottom is “hung” or not.
A true top ALWAYS wants and needs to he serviced.
Never ever returning the service. They want to dominate
and not much else.
The reason there tends to be more bottoms
than tops in general, is that for whatever reasons,
we bottoms tend to outnumber top due to demand over
supply.
There does seem to be an abundance of bottoms compared to tops. I am a top but I don’t want to fuck any men. I just want to get my dick sucked by them because the suck better than women. My problem is that I only find women attractive so I usually come here looking for very feminine looking bottoms, because they look more like women, who are willing to give me head and nothing more. Now that’s a difficult task. LOL
As a bottom it is very frustrating trying to find a total top. Everyone is verse and wants me to top them but I’m not into it. I like to be treated and fucked like a woman in bed. It messes with my role and my level of pleasure if I have to argue about topping someone.
I’m a “Versatile”. I really enjoy “all around play” with a good man. The handful of guys I’m glad to have as regular “play buds” seem to be the same. None of them are Bottom ONLY or Top ONLY as FAR too many guys seem to be. We’ll explore, play around, and enjoy a broad range of aspects of our anatomy. And we know each other well enough to trust the bud when he says “let’s try something.”
I really got tired of “Total Bottom” guys hitting me up to pound their ass because I said I was “Versatile”. Have had a few “Total Tops” hit me up, too. For me, “Versatile” means just that … looking for a VARIETY. I’m looking for guys not hung up on the limitations of “Top” or “Bottom”. Fine, prefer what you’d like, but be willing to enjoy the “buffet” and RECIPROCATE for the guy who’s offering you what you want. If you really do enjoy having your hole filled … or pounding a bud’s ass, … great! But don’t then go all “SELF”-ish by be unwilling to fuck or be fucked. or to kiss or to have your cock sucked or to suck a cock if that’s what the guy who gave you what YOU wanted enjoys.
As a mostly top, I’m not complaining. Mostly I think it depends on location though. My area seems mixed, but I’ve been in plenty of places where everyone seems to be a top.
BoiBait, while I agree with much of your comment, especially the prostrate that sometimes makes my ass literally twitch for a dick even though I prefer topping, I must say that we don’t all like masculinity. Some of us can hardly stand it, but maybe it my case it was from growing up in a rural area filled with obnoxious he-man lumberjacks haha.
Bottoming is easier. You don’t need to worry about staying hard and whether or not you can get off from fucking a hole. If it weren’t for erection issues, there probably would be more tops, or at least more versatiles.
Before viagra, I was total bottom. Once I tried viagra, I found I enjoyed topping more, especially younger and smaller built guys. However, the more I used viagra, the less effective it became. I also don’t like the side effects–stuffy nose, change in vision, rapid heartbeat and headache afterwards. Then there is the cost.
I’ve tried several natural erection supplements. P-Boost used to work like viagra, but the latest bottle doesn’t seem to work. Makes me wonder if it was originally spiked with viagra.
I also have had some success with Monster T, whose main ingredient is D Aspartic Acid, which I believe the body converts to nitric oxide, which the penis needs in order to become erect. However, the pills are big and a block-shaped, so they are hard to swallow. The dosage is 6 pills a day, so it’s a struggle to get ’em all down. I tried a pill crusher to see if that would make things easier, but the taste was rather bitter.
Another one I tried with horny goat weed and ginseng was totally a dud. If anyone else has found a supplement that helps with erections, I’d like to hear about it. 🙂
toby : “bottomming is easier” ??? NOOOOOOO! Bottomming is harder. U need to clean ur ass, u need to get “hurt” at the first thrust, u feel bad when “accident” happens etc. Tops just need to stick it in, thats it.
Why can’t we all just be verse. Flip fucking is seriously the best. I’m from Cincinnati, which is pretty diverse between both tops and bottoms. I’m more so a bottom and here I have absolutely no problem finding a top, in fact I believe they are the majority. Although I did just visit DC which seemed to be mostly bottoms. Was kind of disappointed. I wish people were less stern and more open when it comes to being versatile.
It’s where society is today, everyone needs a label, why is that? Meet a guy and if there’s an attraction go home and have sex, oral anal whatever–let things take their natural course, if you get fucked it doesn’t mean you a bottom, it means that someone slid their hot wet dick up your ass and everyone was happy..if you are always on the receiving end then yes maybe you are a bottom but doesn’t mean you can’t slide your hot wet dick up someone else’s ass, just go with the flow!
I’m versatile and It disappoints me when I find a masculine & very fit man (Dave) with a huge cock that only likes to bottom. SIGH! Come on! we need more men like that to top. I guess those guys are bisexual or married men that are afraid to get physically dirty from another man lol
Because gay men have this stupid idea of if you have a small cock or aren’t super hung they have to be bottoms.
Upper East Side Manhattan is a sea of bottomless pits, you can’t throw a needle in the street without hitting a bottom and they all power bottoms ready to swallow what ever you shoot their way – it’s impossible to find decent top guy to date around here and if you a bottom like me who enjoy sex but not looking to enlarge my hole to the size i can give birth one day you in deep trouble.
thoughts?
Don’t you think it has something to do with pressure for tops to have big dicks? since most guys have average dicks maybe they feel they can’t be tops. It’s stupid because average size dicks can feel amazing. If more bottoms were openly encouraging about wanting to get fucked by average then there would be more tops. if attitudes toward dick size would change it would be a win win situation for all.
Also as a side note, we all no condoms suck but are important. if STD risks disappeared and everyone could bare back there would be a lot more tops. I’m not encouraging people to bare back I’m just stating it as a factor. fucking with a condom for top just isn’t that pleasurable. a lot of guys including me sometimes can’t stay hard with a condom. for a bottom it makes no difference. so it’s just easier to be a bottom these days.
just another example of society trying to narrowly define us as its too confusing to be bi vers and polyamorous. I wouldn’t want to give up on girls or guys, and i wouldn’t want to give up on topping or bottoming which I both enjoy greatly. Maybe if you are extremely small in member size that may lead one to be exclusively a bottom but I say you should learn to use the equipment you were born with. Also makes you a better top to experience bottoming and a better bottom to top sometimes.
I believe boibat is correct. Well, actually all comments are correct. It is tough being an older gay man. LOL,
michael
These forums are good but how about some new stories? They’re all too rare on here
Well, it seems that way most of the time in region of area more bottoms than Tops I’m all bottom which means I don’t Top at all. Therefore most of the time I do without because I can’t find a Top. I think I’m a very nice clean good looking gentleman, honest, since not into the games. I just need a good Top in my life either a buddy or something ltr. Tops are most wanted bottoms you can find a dime a dozen. So, if you have a Top in your life take excellent care of him. Lonely Bottom.
I’m a bottom versatile.I will top but would rather not.I prefer to bottom.But there seems to be more bottoms and fewer tops.If your versatile you have more opportunities. If you only bottom your chances are slim especially in the smaller cities. Major cities like Portland Seattle Frisco metropolitan LA more people and opportunities.
I agree with the rest of the tops, where are the bottoms? I am a total top and I can’t find a bottom to pound good
I’m a 150% top never been a bottom n don’t have the urge
The top and bottom thing seems to be a big deal these past few years. I don’t remember people asking me if I was a top or bottom when I hit the scene in the 80’s. Nature just took it course. However, it may be a little different for us black guys. Most guys just assumed I am top. There are a lot of black bottom guys out there and many of them are built like pro football players. There are a lot of bottoms in general, but I think they can be versatile if they really like their partner. I’ve bottomed…and realized I enjoy topping much better.
TO: SOFT & FLUFFY : Thanks for your comment 🙂 I am glad there was someone else my age who understands! I would love to chat about this subject more – I live in South Burlington, Vermont & my last name is the opposite of “brothers” – my number is listed.
I’m not sure but I noticed where I live there are more bottoms then tops. Which sucks cuz I’m a bottom I enjoy being taken control of not copletely dominated but enough to where I know the top is doin his thang.
Ho,e up any tops out there slimguyy0783
Tops are just as extinct as dinosaurs. Everyone in my area (Worcester county ,MA) is a bttms. It’s so bad I considered switching… Haha then I came to my senses .
Bipolar Disorder is rampant and people in this lifestyle are more so than not symptomatic, the bottoms are hypocritical and judge men whereas I am a Top and when another top likes me and DECIDES to be passive and/or versatile I don’t ridicule him,berate him, or degrade him for that sexual act or position. The guy goes home and fucks his girlfriend and there is no shame or attempts to embarrass anyone. That rainbow that ya bottoms live and claim to be all inclusive is not. Sex is sex and the disgust and contempt in that comment “another bottom!” is sadly why the guys are all single and can’t find anyone. I think being bottom is a choice you volunteer to be. The bottoms wont look at their character and personality defects thats why they say there are no TOPS, is just that the tops dont want them because there off their meds and hypocritical
A lot of guys have made some good points here. I’m a bi versatile bottom who hasn’t had a lot of experience with men, and it’s definitely hard to hook up here in Birmingham because there are so many bottoms and because I waited until I was in my 30’s to start exploring this part of myself. For me, I prefer to bottom because I’ve been giving it the whole time so when I’m with a man then I want to be with a man.
Because a lot of men spent their younger years. Pretending that straight life. And neglected that sensation of good dick. Now in the older years they see the pleasure in it lol…
That’s somewhat the case where I am at. Although I am a bottom, I don’t have a problem competing for top dick. But I tend to disagree with all this bs of being effeminate or lazy or feel the need to submit. Wtf…its all about mindset. I’m a very active wild freaky bottom when playing. Straddle grind and ride. Doggie style backing up into it. Verbal telling a passive or nervous top to slap my asd go deeper Harder etc…Far from lazy and Im definitely masculine. I’m in control of how good and how much ass and cock sucking a top gets. If he’s a hot confident and long lasting wild top…he can dick me down long hard and deep. If a top is passive orcall talk…I will flip him and demonstrate how I want to be fucked. Or just stop leave and go home to my dildo and satisfy myself….just saying….
I am a bottom only I prefer a top because I crave nice big hard cock . I am and will always be a good clean piece of ass I would never let any man fuck me if I thought he might have a mess . I do like the feeling of being controlled and don’t mind wearing panties and such . I agree there seems to be so many bottoms and no tops out there . So the best thing to do is find a good man and stick with him .
I am a top but find that wearing a condom takes away most of the sensation and almost makes it impossible to cum. Bareback is too dangerous. I have also bottomed and find it too painful. I have found a few guys that are disease free that I can bareback with but, sometimes being a top is a huge hassle with most of the bottoms out there.
I’m a total top but my problem is find a smooth soft total bottom who can act fem when we’re together. If you guys find someone whose a true bottom that wants more than a fuck hit me upon here. I’m listed as just relaxnow
verse here…depends on the chemistry…really enjoy topping so called straight men or those that consider themselves tops…love to dominate those types…the thrill of the chase and challenge of getting them to bottom turns me on…love to go deep in that type of man and have him cumming back for more…have experienced a lot of top men that won’t let you fuck but will take 3-4 fingers in their ass and love it..and some tops that tell me eventually they’d like to be fucked…and a lot of tops are eating ass and sucking dick these days…i’m just enjoying the “ride” and getting in where i fit in…
My personal opinion is that bottoms are basically lazy and would rather let the other person do all the work. I am versatile, so therefore I love to give and take. I don’t really understand the Top/Bottom only designation. I will say that I am more of a top man, but I do like getting fucked on occasion. I hate when a guy says I don’t top, but I love the dick you give me. I also understand some of the comments about being shit on. I have been shit on many times and have almost become turned off at the thought of doing it. That’s just nasty. True, accidents happen, but many of these guys was no accident. They didn’t prepare and basically had a rectum full of shit. Come on guys, clean up your act.
Because men in general are selfish lovers and those who enjoy something in thier ass will more often than not chose to bottom and get the maximum pleasure they can have. As a top, i have no issue with the increasing number of bottom men. Just thier poor attitudes. They forget that there are thousands like them out there and we tops dont have any real problems finding one without such stuck up fuckery.
@Ezzo: this post really struck a nerve with me. I’ve tried reaching out and being friendly. But it seems they’ve thrown it right back in my face. Fine. They can go without. I’m not willing to bend over, nor am I willing to give it back to them.
I’m much more top by experience, and would love to throw down with a nice man, younger preferably, but there’s nothing more I can do, even with the plethora of bottoms that are here.
Oh well…
nobody sees the irony of bottoms complaining that there are too many bottoms?
So often when meeting online and exchanging pics, I’ll ask for a cock pic, and without sending one they’ll just say “I’m a bottom”. Huh? That means you don’t have a dick? Then they assume I’m a bottom because I asked for a dick pic and block me because they’re looking for tops. Some really strange mindsets with some of these guys. Sounds more like wanting to be a girl than wanting to bottom. Why would a gay guy think dick doesn’t belong in the equation? Duh.
Charlotte is 99% bottoms. I’m versatile and can’t resist a cute little hairy ass. I’ve even been with some 100% tops that will spread their legs and take a dick. Depends on the mood and situation, I guess.
@JaysSN. Do tell the places where you found everyone to be a top? Also, people, if your gonna bttm then clean your shit hole out! I wont get fucked unless im squeeky clean inside out.
Hey guys you are over thinking this. The fact is nothing is more sexually stimulating than having a nice hard dick sliding in and out your ass. It much better than an prostate messager you can buy. If he hung and thick that much better. I love a good ass pounding. Yes I am all bottom and there does seem to be more bottoms in my area.
Might be the animal instinct of having the life giving cock inside one’s body, either end.
Total top here. I love bottom guys, no shame in it so far as I’m concerned. I have ideas about why there are more bottoms if you want to discuss by email.
I’m new to man play. I love sucking dick and do want to bottom. I’d love to find a man with average or smaller cock to top me. In st louis hit me up. socoman
Well dont know about to many bottoms as a top guy i know that most of your bottoms gay or bi are very picky who thry want to top them even if there submissive they are picky but im not complaining im into the younger bottoms and the submissive i dont hook up much at all but like to find one bottom for on going not one that takes every cock out there
@Bimwmlooking
No, you’re UNDER thinking this. The fact is … all guys are “wired” differently. There are many guys who do NOT find that “nothing is more sexually stimulating than having a nice hard dick sliding in and out your ass.” For many, it is painful and for others no pleasurable feelings at all come of it. Guys are built and wired differently.
Keep that in mind. A position or practice that works for one guy may well not work for the next.
Anal does nothing for me. It does not feel good; it is not in any way pleasurable. I do let good buds have my ass because they want to, they like to, they enjoy “plowing” me, and … they reciprocate with play that I like.
LOL! I’m getting a trip off all the comments and complaints about the issue of all the over propragation of bottoms! Funny while my fitt phrase goes the opposite of the topic compared to everybody’s else’s in this discussion!
I’m a bottom and I agree with this post. There definitely seems to be a disproportionate amount of bottoms in the gay community when compared to tops. At least that’s what it seems.
Here in New England – especially in Connecticut – we seem to be paved with Bottoms. It’s gotten to the point that playing with another Bottom is a lot easier – and faster – than trying to locate a Top. Heck, two Bottoms can have a LOT of fun together; my sexual career is definitely proof of that LOL.
Bottoms are like very prevalent where I live. More so “versatile” than just Tops. My belief is that guys (even some married straight guys) enjoy bottoming more than topping. Im not aroused by a mans penis, but very turned on by the ass (bubble smooth). I usually get blocked by verse guys because I’m a FULL top and they expect me to flip . It’s all relative . Here’s what I can’t understand . Bottoms get disrespect like they are trash and despensable to the point where it becomes a social status hierarchy . Tops higher on the totem. I’m glad that there are Btms , I wish more were sexy though. I’ve noticed that the sexy ones are very picky and stuck up because they think they are elite . So, I end up jacking my dick.
OMG Batman! you just articulated what I’ve felt the same about but didn’t know how to say it, especially that latter portion. Because some of us still try to keep our manners it’s only right,but just because of that doesn’t mean we all agree with the “it’s all good” thing and accept what’s there(which may have well partly contributed to spreading the “bug”. Some WILL just have nothing then. As for me that’s probably why I can count my partners on one hand,call me a snob if you will.
L A Z I N E S S and S E L F I S H N E S S .
Far too many gay men these days are focused on ME and WHAT I WANT and mistakenly assume that the bottom is only responsible for providing his ass to be fucked, leaving it to the top to provide the erection, the effort, the aggression, and the ejaculation. Nature gave men both sets of sex plumbing–an ass AND a dick and too many gay men are shirking their duty when it comes to using their dicks. A woman is a total bottom. A man is versatile by design.
I would LOVE to know where these bottoms are. EVERYWHERE I look on the Atlanta areas are nothing but tops like myself. Which is sad/yet funny in that I ALWAYS hear there are NEVER any tops in Atlanta. Trouble is, there are never any bottoms when I’m looking!
”
Natesillyo
January 18, 2016 at 18:52
Why can’t we all just be verse. Flip fucking is seriously the best. I’m from Cincinnati, which is pretty diverse between both tops and bottoms. I’m more so a bottom and here I have absolutely no problem finding a top, in fact I believe they are the majority. Although I did just visit DC which seemed to be mostly bottoms. Was kind of disappointed. I wish people were less stern and more open when it comes to being versatile.”
Simple, there are those of us who DON’T “go both ways” & it’s natural for us to only have 1 position with sex.
I can agree with WBFF theres true to that too. The problems with me seems every dude I find cute is a top! Me personally a dude doesn’t necessarly have to give me his ass,unless you want me to take you. Wanting me on top making out with him makes him bottom enough to me,the moments of that kind of bonding/closeness I find very intense for me until the grand finale. Then getting together again other times like 14yo’s to play the new found “after school activity”. So, 2 dudes nake doing the above is NOT gay!???
Who knows…but when my sex partner of 12 years is on top of me fuckin me slow and deep or pounding my ass hard and deep it’s the best feeling I experience. I especially love when he pulls out at the last minute, pulls off his condom, moans, and sprays my ass and back with his hot, thick load. I could speculate why there are so many of “us bottoms” on A4A, but for me, I love the feeling of a hard and horny top getting his nut because he is enjoying fucking my ass. For me, feeling the top getting off on my ass is one of the best feelings I have. I have extreme pleasure when I know the top is having extreme pleasure because of me!!!
Very few tips around for me. Very much like to bottom as I love that throbbing hard cook gliding in me, but I will ensure he is enjoying equal pleasure. Will usually start with some oral to get him going. Let him sit back and enjoy for awhile. Then it’s my turn as he enters me and we get a rhythm of thrusts going on.
Come to a small town like radcliff, ky, ft Knox area, etown, tops need sexy bottoms here, that can host. Sexy thick and sexy slim, i prefer manly sexy , fat ass thick. Bear type, top bottom, bring it, vers is the way to go so you can decide what is attracting you to act in a sexual action state of being. Now fuck!
I concur. Way too many bottoms and “versatile/bottom” and not enough tops.
Don’t forget the sea of “clearly by their profile pictures” power bottoms who state they are VERS but the first thing they do when you meet them is put their ass up in the air and beg to be fucked; then when it is time to flip they say they can’t do it because they already came! F^#*ing cheating bitches!
That there are so many big, beautiful, masculine men in this world who so eagerly and hungrily turn their butts up for my testosterously driven attention is very compelling evidence to me that if there is a God…. she must love me very much!!
As much as I love to bottom, I’m realizing it’s so much easier to top. Feels equally as good ( to me), with less much hassle in readying yourself. So much work goes into prepping for your top and when you spend all that time prepping for him and you’re stood up…makes me want to top more and more. I, just moved to a new town and it seems like 75% bottoms and 25% tops. I like to qive myself equal part top to my bottom, but just may go 75% top to 25% bottom in this town.
I would say it’s because not a lot of guys have big dicks and so they’re better off just bottoming. But then again, not many guys have nice holes worth fucking. LOL Seriously guys, get that pussy waxed bleached and douched out before you come backing up on this. Also can’t understand versatile guys. You mean you’re a mediocre top with a small dick AND a mediocre bottom with an ass I wouldn’t stick my face in? Gross.
I think you can’t be a great top without being at least a passable bottom. I have always believed that bottoming is what truly separates us form all the straight men out there; that ability to submit, relax, and empower yourself to be consumed by another man is, to me, the definition of being a gay male. It subtly rewires our psyches to relate to men in a totally different way and, in turn, turns our own ideas of ourselves on their heads. And, as witnessed above, it just feels fucking great. The older I’ve become, the more of a top I’ve become as well