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Speak Out : Depression’s Peculiar Grip on Black LGBTQs – Part 2

Welcome to part two of “Depression’s Peculiar Grip on Black LGBTQs.” As I’ve stated, I’m writing this multi-part series to shine a bright light on how depression can have a more pointed and peculiar affect and impact on black LGBTQ persons. And as an African-American gay man, one who’s suffered from this illness throughout periods of his life, I can attest to its near-crippling effects.

As one might imagine, if you’re black, LGBTQ and depressed, you’re stumbling around with an even heavier, crushing burden on your shoulders.

Before we delve deeper into that, it behooves us to first examine depression among the black community as a whole.

Unfortunately, African-Americans are swimming — and, in many cases, drowning — in a sea of denial: Far too many steadfastly refuse to own the reality that they are confronted by mental health disorders. You see, to admit being depressed is considered a sign of weakness.

The powerful bludgeon called stigma is largely responsible for this sea of denial. Mentalhealthamerica.net’s “Depression and African-Americans,” states: 

The myths and stigma that surround depression create needless pain and confusion, and can keep people from getting proper treatment. The following statements reflect some common misconceptions about African-Americans and depression:

• ‘Why are you depressed? If our people could make it through slavery, we can make it through anything.’
• ‘When a black woman suffers from a mental disorder, the opinion is that she is weak. And weakness in black women is intolerable.’
• ‘You should take your troubles to Jesus, not some stranger/psychiatrist’.

The BET commentary, “Why We Must Talk About Black Men and Mental Health,” adds:

But one factor that deserves more attention is how Black masculinity serves as a huge barrier to seeking care.

Think about it. Whether it’s the media or just what we tell each other, Black men are sent messages every day to be hyper-masculine, super strong, aggressive, and angry.

‘Man up!’ ‘Real men don’t cry!’ ‘Showing emotion makes you weak.’ ‘Being vulnerable makes you gay.’

These types of attitudes continue to help foster a culture of silence that allows Black men to sit and suffer in silence.

Several years ago, African-American social worker and public relations expert, Terrie M. Williams, authored Black Pain: It Just Looks Like We’re Not Hurting. Having battled depression herself, she was interviewed by U.S. News and World Report Health.

“In the African-American community,” she says:

There’s a tendency to hide or ignore symptoms of depression, which include sadness, energy loss, feelings of worthlessness, thoughts of death or suicide, change in weight, and oversleeping or difficulty sleeping. That tendency means missed opportunities to hit the disorder with effective treatments, including talk therapy, antidepressant medication, or both.

African-Americans are less likely to have access to ‘comforts’–such as mental health services, massage, and yoga–that can make dealing with depression easier, Williams says. ‘If you don’t have access to those comforts that cushion what you’re going through, that in and of itself makes (dealing with depression) different and very difficult.’

And, let’s take things a step further: Suicide. According to “Suicide Among Blacks,” by Samantha Gluck, “The suicide rate among black men has doubled since 1980 making suicide the third leading cause of death for black men between the ages of 15 and 24.”

That aforementioned BET commentary reveals more sobering and shocking statistics.

And while suicide rates among Black men are lower than their white counterparts, our rates have gone up dramatically. A report from the U.S. Surgeon General found that from 1980 and 1995, the suicide rate among African-Americans ages 10 to 14 increased 233 percent, as compared to 120 percent of whites.

Depression has been an intimate intruder at various points of my life. Fortunately though, I was able to finally vanquish this formidable foe after making my “great escape” from Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A). As soon as I left that emotionally and mentally abusive relationship, I found a gifted and compassionate therapist who truly saved my life. She put me on the journey to self-awareness and self-discovery — which led to true and sustained healing.

Next up: My first major bout with depression, and the “411” on depression’s peculiar grip on black LGBTQs.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is there for you 24/7 — in both English and Spanish.

Call: 1-800-273-8255. 

Wyatt O’Brian Evans

(Mr. Evans is a regularly featured columnist for The Huffington Post, reporting and writing on a variety of issues and topics which strongly resonate with the LGBTQ Community. He is also a new collaborator at A4A)

 


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  1. K.C.

    I NEVER KNEW I WAS CHRONICALLY DEPRESSED UNTIL I HURT SOMEONE SO BAD THAT THEY HAD TO BE ADMITTED INTO THE HOSPITAL. I SAW MYSELF GOING DOWN THE SPIRAL AND MADE THE DECISION TO SEE A THERAPIST. IN DOING SO I REALIZED THAT I TOOK DEPRESSION FOR GRANTED AND THAT I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE WAY I WAS SUPPOSED TO FEEL NORMALLY. WITH MEDICATION AND THERAPY I HAVE A WHOLE DIFFERENT OUTLOOK ON LIFE. THEN I GET ONLINE AND VIEW ALL THE INSECURE, DEPRESSED, AND BROKEN BLACK MEN ON A4A AND I REALIZE THAT IT’S INFUSED IN OUR CULTURE. I OFTEN THINK OF WAYS TO CHANGE IT BUT I DRAW A BLANK CONSIDERING THE WAY I USED TO THINK. I JUST HOPE THAT EVERYONE IS ABLE TO REALIZE THIS EPIDEMIC AND HOW IT’S THE ROOT OF ALOT OF THINGS THAT ARE WRONG WITH BLACK MEN TODAY

  2. Baron TZ

    Depression and other mental illnesses are more prevalent in the whole gay community. Whether they are concomitant with being gay, or just in a minority is not the issue, but getting care is. No wonder we are so bitchy to each other. There’s not enough love. You can’t just run to a therapist. Most of them are not effective. Loving friends are important, and older friends very important. I don’t know if it is worse for blacks, it could be because of their sometime cultural differences. I do think we talk about it more easily than straight people. It used to be that all gay people went to a therapist. But remember, a therapist can also be the rapist of your mind.

  3. AGS

    depression hits everyone, but there are a alot of different factors that makes depression more prevalent in the black community of gays. we have older people who have literally done nothing but encouraged a younger generation to not like gays. often times these black communities disavow gays at their own detriment and dont even seem to care. thats the world many black men have to look forward to. where are the solutions though?

  4. 1versfucker

    Pretty well every black guy I’ve met or hot to know has been noticeably, genuinely happy. You could do a ‘study’ and find depression in every category of humans you choose. I don’t buy this. It is simply disempowering to any group: target them, tell them there is a problem, and they believe it. The big pharmas have successfully told us that pretty well everything that we don’t conform to is an illness or disease.
    My personal self-help: The 4 agreements. Look it up if you haven’t already.
    Life sucks, get over it, and yourself, and live as fully as you can. You will be dead one day.
    🙂

  5. Wayne

    I use exercise, massage, steam and sauna treatment to destress and relax. I enjoy peace and quiet daily and try to live drama. I avoid negative people or those who have given up on life…

  6. MistrFistr

    Here we go again…somehow, MDD and PAD are a BLACK gay man’s issue. It’s not…the HIV pandemic (and a loss of 212 friends, lovers, acquaintances by the time I quit counting) caused me to develop HIV-related PTSD (yes, neg guys get it too), which the APA is now saying is in itself a pandemic in the gay/bi MALE community OF ALL RACES. There are a LOT of WHITE and LATINO guys I know who suffer from this too, and have varying degrees of success through treatment. Features of HRPTSD are MDD and PAD among several others. For me, it was a hell of cognitive therapy, meds, and hard work at rebuilding myself, but I’ve beat it back into remission after years of suffering. When you state that there is a “black epidemic” of MDD and PAD, it’s because there’s blanket denial of mental illness problems within that subculture. Once recognition comes that there IS a problem, and that it must be treated, there is hope. In most psychiatric situations, recognition of the problem and the will to seek help is 50% of the cure. For Williams to call cognitive therapy (she incorrectly calls it “talk therapy”) and SSRI or other medications “comforts,” she’s showing her complete trivialization of modern psychiatry and clinical psychology. These are not mere “comforts”, they are serious tools. For a patient to work their way out of years of suffering due to HIV-related PTSD, or MDD with PAD features, takes a lot of HARD work, side effects from meds and MANY lost productive, happy years before improvement is seen. This isn’t a “black” issue…it’s a GAY MEN’S issue. For the author to continue to call this a “black” issue smacks of reverse racism and yet another argument to form yet another “protected class.” He exposed the cultural problem with black males in general, to wit: “Black men are sent messages every day to be hyper-masculine, super strong, aggressive, and angry.” Keep promulgating that sort of anti-social behavior in your own community, and you’ll begin to lose the gains you’ve made since 1954. The rest of society won’t put up with it forever.

    • Tee

      I understand your anger and frustration towards the black gay community or even the black community in general but the black American culture is very different from the white cultural life experiences. People of all races have lost friends and loved ones to HIV/AIDS, rather it was 1 or 212. We have all suffered in one or another. However please understand that these series of articles are reaching out to young black American men specifically. It’s not to divide or claim that other races are in relevant. There are some things that white people don’t understand about the black culture and there some things that Blacks don’t understand about the white culture. It’s not a good thing and it’s not a bad thing, it is what it is. I have no problems with white people actually I get along with everyone however my closest friends are black and I spend most of my time with black people because I am more comfortable and can relate better with other black people and that’s not by choice, it is just the way it is. we have a unique culture here in America and unfortunately it is not as United as white people try to say it is. Yes all races suffer from depression across the globe and there are thousands upon thousands of books and therapy sessions out there offering help and solutions to all groups and demographics, doesn’t mean they are presenting themselves as being the most important of all the other demographics. I don’t know you but it seems from your writing you’re not fond of the black community as you’re putting all the blame on us. This is why we have this great division in America because of white anger and black anger towards each other so we all have to work together, not just the black communities. we’re not putting ourselves behind, oppression and feeling defeated is
      what putting us behind. I don’t like certain groups of young black men due to their mentality and behavioral problems, but when I speak to them one-on-one, it’s like night to day. A lot of young black man are hurting deeply but we have the Trumps in the world that see this hurt and frustration as a bad thing. These young black people know what they look like in your eyes. The younger generation has come a long way with acceptance and diversity, it is the old-school people that keep saying that the black people are the ones that don’t want to grow. We do want to grow, we just have to fight to get there and we had to help our own and simply it is what it is. Sometimes the white man just doesn’t understand black man’s burden and I’ll leave it at that. He Doesn’t understand the struggles Or the exclusion or stereotyping of being considered a lowlife or being stereotyped as uneducated or being considered a criminal because of the complexion of his skin. These youths encounter a great deal of depression beyond being gay. Black Americans had to fight a lifetime in this great country for basic things you’ve probably taken for granted. Reverse racism really?! Well if that’s the case, welcome to our world.

  7. Terry

    It seems that hatred for LGBT people is present in many hip hop and gangsta songs along with conservative black politics to other forms of black celebrity. Hating someone who is different seems to go hand-in-hand with ignorance, but what I don’t understand is why black people don’t see that LGBT people are fighting for the similar rights Black people were denied and they fought for over a century ago. Another MAJOR aspect, step into about half the Black Churches, of the 150 or so “abominations” listed in the Christian Bible, they will be hammering the one of Homosexuality about 2-4 times a month while ignoring about 98% of the other sins. While there seems to be little evidence that shows Blacks get thrown out of their loving Christian homes at any rate higher then the loving Christian White homes, what happens to them on the streets we know all too damned well is very disparaging and our prison populations are overfilled with the bigoted system that incarcerates blacks at an alarming rate. To Rise above all that takes extreme strength. To rise above all that without any level of depression is incredible. While I may just be a gay white man, I am not blind to the obvious actions going on in the nation. I have not lived in a predominately black neighborhood my entire adult life because it would be easier, I have done so to eliminate my own personal prejudices,offer a hand to those I can, and to be an eye watching the police diligently, and also to try to help guide those lost into a better place of life before they are lost to Ronald Reagans for profit prison system. There are many many environmental factors that would be depressing for many gay black people. Modern Gays have become separative like other cultures, now that the police do not attack and brutalize gay establishments, and we are assimilating into “everyday” life in the burbs, many do not like those that are too effeminate, too out, too fat, too skinny, too old, too Black, too Asian, and I could go on, but in my early years, when we had to stand and fight the police head on in another brutal assault, no one was too girly, or too black or too anything, we were all one in the big fight for freedom. Us two old Gay white men will live here in this ever changing neighborhood that has never had a white alderman for the remainder of our lives now, we will continue to use our voices to call for freedom, for Blacks, LGBTIA, Women, and all those who remain oppressed. It has often been a challenge for me to remain positive and at times I am certain I am depressed. And I know damned well I had advantages as a Gay White Man versus a Gay Black Man. Lets continue this fight together, and please remember to be inclusive of others, even when it is challenging…

  8. AGS

    Terry.. i’m glad you get it

    but will mistrfistr just shut up… its like he wants everyone to appeal to his sensibilities first, THEN and ONLY THEN can you have an opinion. he keeps pretending like the article said “only black people” and funny thing is, someone like him would go offline and talk about this article as if they said ONLY black people get depressed. and would spread that viewpoint around as if its fact. not even because he thinks they said it but any discussion of any racial issue it seems reminds him of his own prejudices most likely. also, if he doesnt realize that there are factors that arent prevalent to him thats fine, but could you please stop being self absorbed and stop trying to convince these other bozos that there isnt a problem.

    we knew that when certain groups of people finally got gay marriage, those same people would ‘forget’ that they were ostracized.


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