Gay Stuff : Is He Bi If He Just Get A BJ?
(This post was submitted by one of our member, if you would like to submit a text, want to have opinions of other gay men or just want to share a sex story, feel free to send it to blog at adam4adam.com with your username)
I live in the Tampa Bay area (West-Central Florida, USA, for the International, or geographically clueless among you): an area of about 4 million residents. I’ve lived here all my life, and seen good times and bad — both generally, and in the “gay subculture”. I very much enjoy the fact that my city has been open and accepting of LBGT for well over a decade, and now hosts the largest Gay Pride celebrations in the SE USA!
Lately, I’ve been getting “hits” on my A4A profile from self-labeled “bisexual” dudes – usually young (all under 25, some under 20) – and the gist of their message is “Do you want to suck my cock? I don’t want to even touch you, I just want someone to suck my cock. Interested?” What prompted this blog entry for discussion is that I recently received THREE such messages in a single day! (It actually prompted me to check my profile to see if I had inadvertently suggested I would be open to this!)
So I have 2 immediate objections to these messages:
– first, my profile makes it clear that I prefer the 30’s and 40’s set, not so much the “newbies”; and
– second, my profile clearly states I’m about 90% top, and when NOT a top, I like to flip! (That would be the “vers” part).
But then I got to thinking… is a dude really “bi” — or even “curious” if all he wants is to have someone (ANYONE) suck his cock?
First, let’s be honest — gay/bisexual men have been enticing straight dudes with the “all mouths feel the same” spiel since… well, since God created cocks! And we’ve been telling these poor, hapless straight dudes that they’re “not gay” just because its a dude who’s sucking their cock….
Now I don’t begrudge ANYONE whatever gets them off. There are guys who like to be “serviced” and there are guys who like to “service” — I think it’s nice when they find each other! I, for one, happen to be a “do unto others what they’ve been doing to/for you” kinda guy (I love to flip!), but I get it that it takes all kinds. (Let me also be clear that I have no objection to actual bisexual — or even just “curious” — dudes!)
BUT – I don’t think you get to claim “bisexual” status just because you’ll let another dude suck your cock. To my mind, if the only thing you’ll do with another dude is let him suck your cock, then you are STRAIGHT! Maybe not “homophobic, scream at the mere mention of man-on-man sex” straight, but straight none-the-less!
What do you think??
Chip in sunny St. Petersburg, FL
I’m a trans man who’s been all across the rainbow(literally) so I can say that gender and sexuality are definitely a spectrum. I can agree with you a bit though on dudes who just want another man to only suck their cock. I mean everyone gets to define their own sexuality, but I feel that everyone should also be honest with themselves. Sometimes a guy might just be interested in seeing a hot male servicing them. I know that I might not get the same satisfaction if I let a woman go down on me. However, these dudes just seem to want some NSA knob gobbling so I guess its whatever and theyre just in an experimental or horny stage. I can agree that I wouldn’t really consider them bisexual, maybe bi curious. Its more of a “am I attracted to the act?” or “am I attracted to the man doing the act?”.
Sexuality runs a very on a very long spectrum from 100% gay to 100% hetero and people fall all over the place in between. I consider myself bi and somewhere closer to the middle of the spectrum but still closer to hetero. I say that because while I enjoy having sex with men I don’t have romantic or emotional attachments to other men, just women. If I was to get re-married it would be to a woman not another man because that’s just what I like. So a guy who receives just oral from another man and nothing else, and I know a lot pf them, in my opinion is still bi just not a very high percentile one.
UGH, LIGHTEN UP AND GO SUCK UP SOME SWEET YOUNG MAN SEED
TOO MUCH???
I don’t care if ur str8, bisexual, or gay, ALL guys like their dicks sucked even if they say they don’t. In my opinion, getting a blow job from a guy doesn’t make u gay. I’ve sucked off a lot of str8 guys and they do come back cuz their wives/girlfriends just don’t do it the way they like it. Most str8 guys like the feel of a warm mouth around their cock. If u deep throat them, even better. So in all, just cuz a str8 guy gets off by another guy sucking his dick, doesn’t make him bi or gay. It just makes him HAPPY!!!
who cares about the labels.
A guy like that is either mostly straight or mostly in the closet and still trying to deal with his internal struggle and self denial.
I’m a top and the idea of sucking dick alone doesn’t do anything for me. If it is not possible for me to fuck you, then I can’t be into you sexually. I do like sucking dick, eating ass, kissing and body contact, making my partner feel good. If there won’t be any fucking down the road,some day in the future, then there is no point in going beyond friendship.
Some guys might be into the whole straight worship/forbidden fruit thing, but that’s not me.
Would you stop categorizing people and posting all these divisive blogs?
The world is full of INDIVIDUALS of all mixes of traits and behaviours. That’s what makes it interesting. No need to analyze and dissect everyone.
STOP the labelling. It is childish and promotes divisions.
As a website host you have the potential influence over many naive individuals.
Post with a conscious and some intelligence please.
Thank You.
It seems from the post, that you’re bringing issues upon yourself … issues from strangers. Why?
First, no one is owed anything on sites like this. If someone reaches out to someone else, that’s the “reacher’s” choice. Why would the “reached-out-to” be under any obligation to respond? A non-response is just that; no one’s nose has to get out of joint. It’s clean, tidy, and done. “After reading the message and the sender’s profile, the person wasn’t motivated to take it further.” Easy for all. Move on.
If someone hits you up about something that’s opposite from your profile, why do you need to respond? You could send a “Thanks, but I’m not thinking we’re a match” but that could also result in drama about “WHY!?” No sender of a first-time message is just so important that they are owed a response … or a correction which could well just end up with drama. A non-response is just that. Everyone can just move on.
Further, why are you concerned about how someone else classifies themselves? If they want to list “Bisexual” or “Dumbo the Elephant”, why do you need care? If they feel that getting a blowjob from a man makes them “bi”, that’s their choice. Labels are just that … attempts to draw lines where the matter in question is gray come up short.
Simplify your life … focus on your own universe. There’s no need to take on everyone elses variables.
Hmmm, maybe, but there are guys who are fully gay who just receive blowjobs or who don’t have sex at all — does that make them less gay? I agree that sexual activity doesn’t necessarily determine sexual orientation — after all, there are plenty of gay dudes who have sex with women for years before they come out. And there are lots of bi- or polysexual dudes who only have sex with men, usually because it’s easier and more available.
So the answer to the question “is he bi if he just gets BJs” is maybe yes, maybe no.
Just receiving blowjobs exclusively doesn’t automatically mean you’re NOT bi. Yes, it could just be experimentation or just getting off. But if this is something you’re doing on the regular with guys while also maintaining a strong attraction to women, I’d say you are probably bi. You also might be gay — that’s for you to decide. You can be bi and never have sex with a man, but if deep down you know you’re attracted to both men and women sexually, you’re bisexual. Orientation is self-determined, sexual activity is just an expression of sexuality and it can confirm or contradict orientation in many complex ways.
Hi chip, I am a young bisexuals who agrees with you, if the only thing a guy wants us a blowjob them he is straight, maybe curious but straight… I think wants he actually buttfucks he can join the bi team lol… But what about “str8 guys” who like to give other guys head but hats it??
“get’s” That’s all in your mind, and you help reinforce the stereotypes, and rigid label-fitting, pigeon holing, that goes on in society and is far more pervasive in the non-existent community, that is promoting diversity and inclusion, yet you still feel the need to compartmentalize people, solely based in sexual buzzwords. It was nice that you included “geographically clueless” people in your blog though, very thoughtful.
It’s ll about YOU and it is you that is limiting yourself, to base sexual encounters, as to your own parameters, we all have our limits, and “standards.” I think you think way too much about it, if you have to put percentages, labels, maybe even color coded tabs on your files. Tragic. Just tragic.
I think the label is unnecessary. If a guy wants to call himself bi because he wants a blow job, he considers himself bi. I actually think it’s less honest when guys profess to be “straight,” but want head from guys. I’d also imagine a lot of guys who are into servicing don’t really care how the servicee labels himself, especially when he’s hung, handsome, and delivers a load.
I completely agree. I’ve taken many loads at the ABS from guys looking at straight porn. I don’t care who you’re thinking of as long as I get the nut.
ahhhhh…. i seee
establish gay cultural expectations that a man who simply gets a bj from a dude and nothing else must be straight.
way to make them feel more comfortable. You have just increased the amount of trade and DL by 10% i believe.
I agree but when he is bi and says I’m straight and if I’m fucking your ass its not cheating on my wife and I’m not gay just like juicy asses I have heard from several dudes even in the clubs with the any style crowd
I think you’re making a good point. I don’t have an opinion either way on this (yet) but this is one of the most interesting topics I’ve read on the A4A blog so far.
I think due to there age they are just experimenting, Trying to find them selves. And what they like.
Or they are just selfish little lost boys who have no idea.
I like oral and jacking. Not into anal at all.
Am I gay. You bet, I like cock and balls. But if a guy just wants to get down and use my cock and balls for his pleasure. Fine with me. I do that to some guys I like. Get down and worship there cocks and balls for all there worth.
Especially the married young guy who is happy and just wants to share his nice cock now and then. Take it for what its worth. Answer them back with what you think at the moment pertaining to how they worded there question. Tell them no I don’t want to suck your cock today. I want to fuck you good. What the hey. Be as crude as they are at the moment. And keep smiling.
Well Chip, I see it this way, and I have been around a lot longer then you have. I believe most curious guys no matter the age if they get serviced enough time from a gay or bi dude, he will eventually want to do more, hense, then he is either bi or deside to go gay. Such guys I think are afraid of there own feelings and are at first experimenting getting a serviced only from a dude. But I have noticed for many, either they don’t know what the labels mean or they are confused themselves. What I am referring to are a lot of the a4a “models” list themselves as bi, when they clearly are playing for the guys online. I think a lot of guys believe if they are something other then str8t, they are not all man, which couldn’t be further from the truth. Well that is my thoughts on this topic anyway.
If they really believe that all mouths are the same then how come I would never let a chick suck me off ?
Answer = Because I’m fckn gay !
Would I suck a guys’s dick , would I let another guy suck me off ? Sure , if he’s got the right stuff going on.
But only because I’m gay .
I guess that’s the great thing about the mindset of ‘some’ bisexuals .. they really think they are (bisexual) but NOT gay .
If you let another man suck your dick you are gay, your dick got hard so a guy could suck it and you got off, sex is in the mind, so yes – GAY! You can try to pretend that you are straight because you did not suck dick but you are gay.
Not really my dick is always hard even when the wind blows and I only let guys blow me because they no how to let me hold there head and fuchsia there face hard balls slapping off chin never lose a drop a woman never did anything close.
Is it necessary or even desirable to label someone? If you know what they’re into and want to hook up, great. If you don’t want to hook up, great. I just don’t see the need to attach a label to something so complex and often dynamic as human behavior.
No. Absolutely not. I personally don’t talk to people that identify as bi or DL. WAY too much emotional baggage with those 2.
I tend to disagree that their straight. When I was young and started exploring I wouldn’t touch another guy just wanted my cock sucked and that was all. I hated the thought that I might be homosexual. It wasn’t until a few years later that I allowed myself to explore more to kiss suck, rim, fuck. I felt dirty after I did it but I new I was very attracted to it. So thinking that these guys are straight is not true. I don’t know what they are or for that matter whats in their head, but straight I find not beleivable. Thank you for reading.
FORGET the label(s) Bottom line (from what you’ve written) is that a male (simplify just to gender here) with some degree of arrogancy is advertising for some dupe to “service” him/suck his cock. Pretty shallow and self-centered! My response: If what you’re seeking is to get off somewhere warm and wet….use one of the jets in a hot tub!”
It could be that he’s not all that comfortable with his sexuality. So he’s easing into it by only wanting to receive oral at this time. He could eventually want to do more stuff if/when he becomes more comfortable with himself and/or with a certain guy. I don’t believe that this guy is straight, I do believe he is bi.
It is difficult to be comfortable in our society as a bisexual man. Only 12% of bi men are out compared to about 33% of bi women and about 75% of gays and lesbians. As a result, many bi people, particularly bi men, will try to pass or be erased as either gay or straight, depending on their current partner. Unfortunately, many in the LGBT community are biphobic, as many straight people are.
As a bi man myself, I was closeted for a long time. I am more romantically attracted to women and therefore passed as straight, as I mainly dated women. When I started seeing other guys, I was reluctant to do much besides jack off with them. I wasn’t completely comfortable kissing a man due to lingering insecurity about my sexuality. I then started to become more comfortable and started to do more with guys in the bedroom. Years later, I didn’t want to hide in the closet anymore and made the decision to begin coming out. People around me have been accepting and supportive. I know that I’m making a difference to others in the bi community as well as the LGBT community in being an out and proud bisexual. The more we come out, the less stigma there will be. The less stigma, the more comfortable people will be with their sexuality.
That said, be sure to respect the other guy’s limits and don’t do anything he’s not comfortable doing. If you’d like to do more, talk to him about it. If he’s not interested, then maybe look for a different guy.
A straight dude would not be interested in a blow job from another man. The definition of straight is that they are entirely interested in the opposite sex.
A truly straight man would sooner go without, or jerk off, before letting another man’s mouth touch his body.
So the guys hitting you up are at least bi, (if not fully gay and saying they’re bi so you won’t insist on getting your dick worked on).
BTW, the scene that you are describing “I’ll let you blow me but I don’t want to touch you.” Is not indicative of any particular sexuality. I, for example, am a gay man but I enjoy letting other dudes service me with no reciprocation. There’s a whole gay fetish scene known as CMNM,(clothed man, naked man) in which one of the two (gay) men remains fully clothed and services the other man who is naked. It is completely one-sided, but in a consensual way. Typically only the naked one cums.
So, as usual, whenever someone tries to pigeon-hole other people into their neat little categories, it doesn’t always work out that way in real life. It’s more complex than that.
A mouth IS NOT a mouth!
Even a gay guy who gives average head is still a pro next to the chic who is considered great at it. Or are you going to say that I promote the second lie that men blow better?
Young guys are just plain horny all the time and might let another guy blow them just so they can get off.
If that happens once, twice, maybe even a third time then it is what it is. But after that I’d have to think they’re no longer curious. It’s starting to look and sound at the very least as he’s BI.
By that time just because a guy isn’t going to reciprocate, or touch you, or do anything else, doesn’t make him just horny, straight, and looking for a mouth. He is obviously seeking out a guy at that point, and that is BI providing that he still has a thing for chics.
Well Mr. Clinton, yes it WAS sex..haha! Sorry to disagree, but sex (of any kind) with the same gender at least renders him/her as bisexual…at least in my book 🙂
I think a lot of young men have heard that nobody sucks cock like another man, and the want to try it. Another possibility is that they can’t get a girlfriend, or can’t get their girlfriend to do it, so they will let a guy suck their cock. But they’re not going to touch him in return. The third possibility with the under-25 crowd is that they already know they are bi, or already know they are gay, but are not ready to accept any other label besides straight or str8. And I think most of the time they see your picture and send a message, and that’s why your profile says 30s and 40s and you still get these messages from 20-somethings. The next time you decide to take a youngster up on his offer, try sliding a wet finger up his ass. If he lets you keep it there and move it around and in/out, then the game’s up!
I agree with you 100%. A man is not bi or gay for letting a gay man blow him? If he goes down and plays with the gays dick while getting sucked, he might be a little bi! If he goes down on the gay man and blows him, he is gay! That’s the way I have always known it and I get straight dick every day coming by for a blow job because their wife or girlfriend will not suck them and a blow job is the best feeling in the world!
If a man nuts in another mans mouth before he nuts in his own hand, he has started to move to the right on the Kinsey Scale. I believe in labeling lifestyles though, so I do believe a man can still be considered straight because of him wanting to live a life with more women involved even if he does go all the way with men. You can’t say a mouth is a mouth if you can’t say an ass is an ass.
Yes Mr. Clinton, that WAS sex…haha! Sorry to disagree Chip, but to me, a person who has any type of sexual relation with the same sex renders him/her bisexual…at least in my mind 🙂
I think I dont care, and it doesnt matter. Im all for labeling amd stereotypes, but this is just stupid. Let him be what he is comfy with.
I would have to say they could claim the bi title.To me a straight person is someone who will not have same sex for any reason.My beef is with guys who claim to be straight but wanting a guy to blow them.If they were straight shouldn’t they be looking for a woman to suck their cocks?If anyone participates in any type of sex with a person of the same sex they are not straight.They are bi if they have sex with both sexes.If a guy is only getting blowjobs from other guys they could possibly be closeted gays.
Im in my 50’s & live in the midwest! I have hooked up with a few guys that say they are str8, they come over I give them a blowjob & some I rim their hole out & they all love it & shoot their loads. They won’t suck my cock, but they will stroke it & jack me off & they all like to have me come some where on their bodies. And majority of these guys are married or have a girlfriend & its all age brackets. But they claim that they are not Bi, they say they are str8. Whatever!!! In my mind any guy that lets another suck his cock & rim his hole is gay!!! I really don’t think a true str8 guy is going to let a Bi or gay guy touch his body in any way!!!
I think if a straight guy wants a gay guy to suck his dick and that’s all he wants and he does nothing to u,then he is still straight and just wanting a bj. after all, a straight man thinks with the wrong head sometimes too.
I agree with you as an older str8 man who has been married several times and has on occasion enjoyed a bro job (kidding) over the years sometimes when I was in a relationship. I wish I was gay and could enjoy screwing or being screwed by a man. Seriously, its a joke but gay men have the sex lives straight men dream of. I’ve come to look at it as my “kink” and I thank all the gay and bi men who can enjoy that part of me without judgment. Say are there any gay men who sometimes have sex with women as their kink? I guess THAT would be bi.
I disagree.
Straight guys do not want a guy on them.. I started ezperimenting with a buddy when we were kids then went straight as a teen … My first exploits in bi were getting sucked through a glory hole in my mid 20s. .. Probably for 6-7 months before i touched back then everything progressed. But I always liked cocks.
I remember reading about tea rooms of th 70s in sociology. Older guys said when they wefe youbger they loved getting sucked when younger and wouldnt consider sucking.. Then said they were now the best cocksucker. That may be who these guys are.
Oh and save the message for a week and see if tbey are still around… Bet you they are not…
Oops meant to say i always liked looking at cocks in porn.
Bi guys are too risky in my opinion. Too much emotional baggage. Same goes for DL. If you don’t identify as gay, we can be friends but that’s about it.
I wish I got those hits, lol. But according to the research, the “true 100%” hetersexual is rare and that everyone straight person has some bi tendencies. I wonder if it is that being Gay or Bi is more acceptable than it ever has and the younger generation has been growing up with Gay people who are in the mainstream and in the public eye – maybe the younger generations (I am 50) are more open to exploring their Bi side or seeing it they are interested in it at all. The “straight” guys my age were/are more closed-minded and back in the day would think that even getting sucked by a man would be “gay” (not “Gay” in the positive sense. Might be totally off-base, but it makes sense to me. The younger generations seem to be more tolerant of differences, where when I was in my teens and twenties, for the most part, you wanted to conform. My teen years were horrible being bullied and I always wondered if some of the guys were homophobic due to being Gay (but fitting in), bi, *ssholes or it was the times then.
I don’t believe in bisexuality in men. But I believe that it starts with oral then eventually moves to other things.
Getting a blowjob is having sex! Getting a blowjob from another guy is gay/bisexual! Once a guy gets a blowjob from another guy, he is going to want another blowjob and a very good chance he is going to want to do more with another guy. So whether you call yourself straight, curious, bi, or gay, what difference does it make. I think we all need more guys to be more accepting of the gay bi community!
If he liked it, he’s bi..
It’s hard to say. A guy who just wants another guy to suck his cock and that’s about it. Is he “bisexual” ? He is selfish, that much for sure.
I’ve see the term homoflexible. Maybe that’s it.
Ever heard of the Kinsey Scale? A rank of 0 to 6 or hetero to homo.
A pure straight person is 0, after even one sexual interaction with the same sex, a person would no longer qualify as 0, they would be a 1.
So yes if someone is seeking or fantasizing about same sex interactions they can identify as bisexual.
Now I’ll pose some questions:
Why is a sexual qualifier required?
Who gives a fuck where someone puts their cock and how they choose to classify their behaviour?
More important issues worth discussing are (positive) the level of acceptance where “straight/bi” guys are comfortable enough with same sex interactions without fear of ending up in hell or (negative) the sexual addiction/health issues that spawn from increased sexual opportunity.
it seems to me, that however one identifies, if you are engaging in sex, with someone of the same gender…….. even when the activity is limited, then you are engaging in homosexual sex. So, in the above example, the ordinarily straight dude who wants to get sucked by another man would in fact not be straight, but bi-sexual……….that he limits himself to only being on the receiving end of oral sex makes him no less bi-sexual. To expand on your premise, are you also saying that a gay man who only likes to receive oral sex is ‘less’ gay? I guess what I am trying to say, is that there is a difference between how one identifies and the kind of sex people have, and just because they identify as straight doesn’t mean they engage in only heterosexual sex………which really means they are not really straight even though this is how they identify.
This can seem complicated, and never more so in the case of our
transgendered brothers and sisters. I remember once reading a personal in the village voice that read “male to female transexual seeking woman to have sex with”………..this totally perplexed me until I understood that there is a difference between gender identification and sexual orientation. Gender identity being how a persons sees themselves, be it male or female……..and sexual orientation, that is, what kind of sex you like to have.
I would say Yes, bi. I think bisexual applies to anyone who sexually interacts with the same gender. Then again, I hate labels… if both parties agree, and like, who cares what its called!
You have a cock that’s hard, you invite a male to suck that aforementioned cock, you enjoy by coming — you are NOT straight! It’s only because the cock-suckee down not want to be labeled or thought gay or bi. You suck or get sucked — You Are NOT Straight! Geesh.
I hate the labels.. That being said, I firmly believe that everyone is gay. Some people just aren’t enlightened enough to be exclusive with the same gender.
I might be wrong as heck, but my so called ‘Gaydar’ has never worked.
WHO CARES! Gay, Bi, Purple, Green…let him label himself as he sees fit. Not your business.
That being said…watch yourself. Could be a scam especially if your “older” and they’re younger. Hit them up and they’re asking for monery OR they come to your house and rob/assult you.
Caveat emptor dude (Let the buyer be ware).
I think of sexuality in terms of romance. If you can generate genuine romantic feelings toward a woman (and you’re a man) then you’re straight. Genuine romantic feelings toward a man or woman, you’re bi. Genuine romantic feelings toward another man, you’re gay. This is “I can see myself spending the rest of my life with [a man/a woman/a man or woman]” not “I’ll fuck dudes but I’m going to marry a woman. That’s just greedy.
Other than that, sexuality runs the gamut. I believe straight guys will let other guys do sexual things with them because it’s a level of “bro”-ness, it’s less complicated than trying to fuck women, there’s a level of trust that it’s JUST sex and nothing romantic, etc. But I view those guys as straight…they have no romantic feelings toward the guy who is sucking them off and generally don’t care what that person looks like. That’s why people are like “in these videos, how is that tatted up muscle guy letting that [whatever you find unattractive] guy suck his dick!!?!?!” – because it’s not about attraction or romance; it’s just about getting your nut.
So…those guys messaging you are probably straight, but there is no box for “just using gay guys’ mouths when girls aren’t available” so they have to check “bisexual” – even though they really aren’t.
I would have to agree with some of the others here that as long as you get aroused by sexual interaction with both genders on any level, you are bi. The ability to get an erection and function with a man or woman means you are bi. How wonderful that is and how it expands one’s options!
Really? Man sex is man sex whether you suck or penetrate
I didn’t read all of the responses, so I apologize if this has been mentioned. Those 20-25 year olds are looking for money to pay rent or to buy drugs. I’m considered a “daddy” due to age and they contact me all the time. If you accept their offer, they will then respond back with “are you generous”. Don’t worry about it, just block their ass. Bi is anyone that willingly has sexual contact with both sexes.
Sigh…. Who cares do we need to label everything? Not interested move on if so reply.
In almost every instance when I did a blow and go I found that after the pants came down they really enjoyed some light touching. By the second or third encounter we were both naked, stroking and sucking each other. I still get together with a few of the guys a couple years later.
Honestly, I think I would rather more guys use bisexual rather than go around saying they are straight, but yet openly enjoy blowjobs from guys. Too many guys use “straight” as a cover story so much that they start to believe it themselves. Like “Oh yeah, I’m totally straight, but I like BJs from guys too, and I screw them, but I’m totally straight”. it is people like that which make the haters believe that sexuality is completely a choice, because they make it look like, even though they take part in gay sexual activities, they are “making the decision” to be straight and not gay or bi. Blow jobs are considered oral sex, it is still sex, and guys having sex with guys is not straight. If a guy was fully straight, even when he is desperate, he would just have a wank to porn rather than get a blowie from a guy. If you can go around, getting BJs from guys, yet still call yourself totally straight, you had better come home from Narnia before you get lost for good.
You need to give me some pointers on what to put in my profile to get those messages 😉
I am a gay man and proud of it. I have no interest in women whatsoever. I’m still a virgin as far as chics go. I wouldn’t want a cross dresser to blow me either, it’s just not my thing.
I can’t picture a chic giving me head no matter how hot or talented she might be.
Likesise a 100% straight guy is going to jerk off before letting a gut blow him. If he does let a guy at his dick he’s at least curious and if he comes back for more he’s bi with limits.
I’d like to say that a man, including myself, can suck a cock much more superior to most women
Hate the labels. If a guy wants sucked by a guy but identifies as straight, good for him.
I read the post about the guy who has sex with men but doesn’t have romantic or emotional attachment to them. As a gay man who can have sex with a good looking girl ( bless their hearts they think they will turn this hot sexy home to be straight) I have no emotion or romantic feeling towards women they are just too complicated. But to answer your question I believe everyone is bisexual it is in our nature we are sexual beings. If a man has even thought about being with another man even in the aspect of it disgusting him he still had the thought meaning he was .5 percent thinking about it.
That’s my opinion.
If a guy lets another guy even touch him in a sexual way, he is NOT straight…he is either bi or a closet gay. A 100% straight man would be repulsed at another male touching him in a intimate way…just as I am 100% gay, and if a female tried to give me a bj, not only would I not be able to get it up, it would take all my will power to not spew projectile vomit! I think it’s so amusing how some guys will go to any length to convince themselves that they are not gay even though they crave cock in their dreams. —
And another thing…I agree about the young twinks hitting on older guys…I’m 55 and I put in my profile that I’m only interested in guys close to my age, but I still get lots of messages from twinks…what’s with these kids.
P.S. – I’m 55, 5’9″, 145lbs., slim, blue eyes, moustache. — I Need a Husband!!!!
Bi. Plain and simple. Now get here so I can swallow some hot cum
I once had this on and off again thing with this “Straight” boy who said he was straight but only wanted to suck my penis. He never wanted to kiss or for me to suck him off at all. Strange guy lol and yes he’s gay
Im a gay 25 y/o this whole is he bi thing i never really understand. Ive personally experienced bi “straight” guys wanting only for me to go down on them but it does get old because i wanted more and when you end it they asked “why”. Everyone likes different things. Some things may not fit your perspective. So this whole issue is he bi is kinda an old question. I have learned men in general love sex, and some are not opposed from who they get it from. Whats the saying “Sex is Sex a Nut is a Nut”.
I am like most of the guys in here. Who cares about labels. If a guy likes to get his cock sucked, he just likes to get his cock sucked. I have a guy stop by often because his girlfriend does not give head. Most of the guys I have sucked off is just looking for good head. Either their ladies don’t suck or not good at it
As the author, I want to reply to a couple of points:
1) I didn’t hook up with these guys… as I said in my post, I’m not into the “servicing scene” – and I’m additionally not into “chicken” (eek! Another label!). Give me a hot 40 y/o who knows what he’s doing vs. some “young gun” who still has all of the drama…
Also, I specifically pointed out that other people’s fetishes are fine with me! Far be it from me to tell anyone how they should or should not get off (as long as it doesn’t hurt others without their consent).
2) Labels ARE important… it is how we attempt to understand and relate to our world! There are professions that do nothing BUT apply labels to things! Even a clear jar of pickled pigs’s knuckles needs a label!
3) Still, labels about sexuality, whether applied to you or by you, should not be given too much import… on any given day, we could all act outside our “normal” (ok, “usual?”) sexual behavior…but riddle me this: why is is not OK to question when a guy who won’t actually touch another guy is bi, but there is no such outrage when a 50 y/o dude calls himself a twink and gets called out for it? They’re both just labels!?!?
4) Intentionally mislabeling things is always controversial… which is, in itself, sometimes alluring! Hence the str8 dude fascination with crossdressers & m2f trans people: s/he looks like a “girl” but has a dick!
Anyway, the point of the post was to provoke discussion. I’m glad it did! 🙂
FWIW: In each of those 3 cases (different profiles, same essential request) I replied “I’m not your man, but thanks for the attention”. I reply to nearly every 1st message — I think it’s polite to respond, even if it’s “I’m not your man for this job”
I think you are thinking to much! The main thing I am concerned about is me…life is to short,if you don’t want to meet these guys just delete. that takes about 5 seconds and you don’t need to loose all the sleep over it!
Good luck, but I would suggest a challenging hobby and let your sex life be relaxing and fun
Great thread! I agree with most here. Neither man is straight in a man on man situation unless one is just curious and only does it once and is turned off and never thinks about it again. But, I guess my main problem with these guys is they don’t read profiles. They should know from your profile that you would not be interested in what they want.
I am equally confused by the very young guys who just want to service and don’t want to be touched in any way. They don’t even get naked or jack while doing it (guess they do that afterwards in private?).
First and foremost it shows that few actually read what a persons profile says!
There are plenty of str8 (or claiming to be str8) men who just want their dick sucked, It’s fine by me.
Please just read a profile completely before you respond to one!
I don’t really care what somebody wants to call themselves-don’t really even notice. If they have a nice dick & want me to suck it-I’m game. Personally I don’t connect too much emotionally w/ guys. I love sucking cock-my favorite thing!, but I can only enjoy intimacy with a woman. Go figure. Enough with the labels, love your life!
No. It does not make one Bi if a guy gets a blow from another guy. If so then every gay guy that ever had sex “once” with a woman is Bi. Even if he had his dick sucked more then once, all that means is that someone knows how to give good and I do!
In all these years, this is the first time I’ve heard there is a problem with tons of young guys hitting up old guys for nsa BJ’s.
I honestly despise that kind of guys who think of gay people as “substitute women” and play around with them as sex toys…if the guy’s not at least curious about touching other guys I won’t even bother, please stop feeding the stereotype of homosexuals being desperate, lustful whores.
Chip, i agree with you if it’s you only suck me he’s strait and i think to a degree lying to himself. all guys are horny sex crazed to some measure.having sex with both genders is BI period.However a true bi-sexual is intimate with both genders and they really like both !! repressed strait boys-men may be nice to blow but way to uptight overall to bother with on a regular basis.
I like to think of myself as “bisexual” even though during the past few years, the only sex I’ve had has been of the gay variety. When you’re old and decrepit like me, though (I’m 66 and disabled with MS), it seems as though the only people I can get to agree to have sex with me are guys.
I enjoy the sex, to be sure, but still long to make love to women like I used to. But at this point in time, I will just take whatever I can get.
I like having a guy suck my dick but also like sucking on another guys’ dicks. But I like eating pussy, too, and having a woman suck on my dick. I like fucking women but also like fucking men and having them fuck me.
To me, it is all about mutual pleasure. While, like I said, I enjoy the sex, it is just as important to me that my partner enjoy the experience, too. It’s not just an intent of mine for me to get my rocks off, I want my partner to get his or her orgasm, too.
It’s all a matter of pleasure, to me. Mine AND my partner’s, whether it be a man or a woman I’m with.
One of my fondest memories is of one lady I used to make love to. When she reached her orgasm (usually as she was riding me and long after I’d reached mine, or at least my first one) she would moan a long, drawn-out word: “Pleasure!”
A comedian I saw once said the dick knows what it wants. Whatever it responds to, it obviously likes it. You can try claiming whatever you want, but obviously you like that if the person can get a response out of it. You can try to deny it, but you know deep down inside, who you are what you really like.
As a 52 year old divorced Man. I started out getting head cuz the wife wouldn’t go there. Told my self I was bi curious. eventually moved to sucking dick myself and now want to bottom. Everyone is different, but I think all guys are curious to try more.
You are whatever you think you are. Stop with imposing labels on other people. How you feel and how they feel may be completely different. Just enjoy life and if you and he are after the same thing together, why define it?
Really! With all the things going on in the world, this is all he has to worry about! I am more concerned about his condescending attitude! Maybe he should volunteer somewhere, and not spend so much time thinking about dick sucking!
Well’ All I have to say is, you are who you say you are**. If you say you’re a Tranny, then you’re a tranny, a man with tits and his cock intact~~~. If you say you’re straight, and you like the act of a guy sucking you’re cock, then that’s what you do,, but you are who you say you are, and not who someone wants you to be””” Real gay men like the Dramma of being gay, and want every man to be gay so they can have him~~~**
Real gay men have a problem with labels, and wish the world would just become gay”””””. The real problem is’ you GAY MAN, who can’t accept other MEN to live the life they want to Live, and call hisself what he wants to call himself~!!!! (GAY MAN””” live and let live) You have the problem not him~!!! The Dramma is in you*****. Suck his cock and let that man live free to who he say he is~~~~~ 🙂
I think sexuality is just too complicated to pin down so precisely. I think of it in terms of romance; straight people have genuine romantic feelings toward the opposite sex. Bisexuals have genuine romantic feelings toward both sexes and Gay people have genuine romantic feelings toward the same sex.
Straight guys don’t like things being complicated, and I think that sometimes if the girls in a persons’ life are being testy or emotional, that guy may turn to another guy for some “bro” time or even go to one of his gay friends to get off. But it’s only that – there is no emotional or romantic attachment to it. It’s just convenient and uncomplicated. I’ve had some friends who were fucking their straight friends and when they got emotionally invested the straight guy pulled away. They aren’t looking for a relationship because they don’t have those feelings – they just like that they can get sex or a bj or something with no complications.
So…these guys are probably straight, but there is no box for “just looking to get off because my girlfriend is being difficult” so they check “bisexual” with a list of “except for kissing, touching, talking, moving and looking into my eyes” and so on.
Who cares? Can we finally move beyond the labeling bullshit?
First time here. Has been entertaining. I have but one observation which i must preface with “I am Bi”. how do i know. my idea of heaven is to have a man cum in my mouth while i cum in a lady’s vagina. if that aint Bi … My observation seems to be that the proclaimed GAY seem to be more emotional about labeling. and i am with the guy who wants to know “how to get guys to ask 4 BJs.”. Happy Holidays wish u all success and happiness!
Chip- You are a smokin hot man!
This 55 y.o. would def kick back… and top and bottom GRRRRRR
The labeling matters when straight or bi men have sex with gay men and view the gay men as lesser–not worth the same rights, the same treatment, or the same equality. The labeling matters when straight or bi men have sex with gay men and then make jokes about them and call them cocksuckers and buttfuckers and other derogatory names. The labeling matters when straight or bi men have sex with gay men but do nothing when their straight or bi buddies go out gay bashing.
I recently hooked up with a student who attends Vassar College, which is close to where I live. We made out and engaged in mutual c*ck sucking. F*cking, however, was off limits. He said, “If I f*ck or get f*cked by a guy, then I can no longer consider myself straight.” I thought that was funny.
My feeling is basically this. If you simply want a blow and go or some other anonymous sex then you are just are just a horny dude who shouldn’t be hiding behind the “bi-curious” banner. If however you are interested in making out or mutual JO or whatever then I would consider you to be truly bi-curious at least.
Guys will ALWAYS want a bj,especially a good one. And is a fact we know how to suck a c$!k..So if a hot str8 boy is sketchy about having a dude go down cause he doesn’t want to be bi, just say “Naw brah your still str8”.
I don’t really care about labels but how I think of it is if a guy thinks about getting a blowjob from a guy and does and keeps coming back for more they are either gay or bi and just dont want to admit it.
For me all the guys have their gayish sides…I mean no matter how straight u are once u are in that situation of man to man body contact specially if the guy are truly handsome.. You will not resist on it…you will find yourself horny too.
It’s not for anyone else to decide or label another person. Let the person define (or not define) themself. I’m looking forward to the day when all of this doesn’t even matter…
Several of have pointed out (rightfully) that human sexuality is expressed across a broad continuum with homosexual behavior on one side and hetero on the other. I believe the continuum of sexuality looks like a conventional bell curve with the majority of us somewhere in the middle. The fact that 90% of the population is self-described as “straight” is due to the influence of culture: straight is our cultural norm and the gap between cultural and physiological norms is the fertile territory where distrust and outright hatred are cultivated.
A person’s place on the sexual continuum isn’t static. It moves around depending on cultural (societal) expectations and a person’s own physiology. The same hormones that make a guy horny can also direct his attention to one end or the other of the continuum.
So…. labels are pretty much pointless. We are what we are, and we may not be tomorrow what we are today. Get over it.
Over the years, I’ve come to realize that a STRAIGHT male will let that CERTAIN guy suck their cock. And usually it comes after months of talk about how great guys suck, and how women don’t like to do it.
I’ve sucked SOOOO many straight dudes.
Some have been bc their women want to see it,
Some have been bc opportunity struck (lucky me 🙂
Some have been drunken nights.
Some I have paid. (Known males I’ve worked w or long time friends)
And ALOT have been bc they meet me, get to know me through friends and parties and get togethers, that I literally become a GF to them. No longer the gay guy, but actually someone they love, love to be around, love that I’m gay, and esp when drinks r in them. Boy, they flash me, kiss me Nd hang all over me. OFCOURSE, they’re drunk, but they ALLLLLLLL tell me the say thing.
“Dude, if u can keep it between us two, I’d let u suck my dick”
And I have sucked plenty that way, and they remain my friends, and with their gfs or wives, and kids. And they always tell me, they do it ONLY bc it’s me, and bc I’m cool and not “gay gay” (fem). I’m just like one of them. And OFCOURSE I give the greatest head ever to prove my point!! That men DO suck better cock.
So NO, I don’t think a guy is gay bc he relieves a bj from a guy. I don’t think he is gay even if he GIVES a bj. To me. Sex is sex. I’m GAY, and I can have sex w a female, and I’d still b gay. I think u r, who you fall in love with. What gender u fall in love with. LOVEEEEE! It’s who u love, not who u fuck that makes ur gay or straight
I have a str8 married guy that stops by a few times a week for a blow job. It is the same process every time. He texts me saying he needs to drop by. I say ok. I have to be clean shaven with a very smooth face, I don’t speak, I can run my hands over his nice hairy legs. He is not a quickie. He only touches my head and throat. When he is finished he says nothing and gets dressed and leaves. It has been two years and we have never seen each others faces. But then I like it that way also. I love to serve