Health: Postcoital Dysphoria (PCD), What is it?
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Have you ever felt sad, irritable, or distant after sex? If so, you are not alone, and also there’s a term for it. Its medical term is postcoital dysphoria (PCD) or, you may have heard it in a more common term: post-sex blues.
Usually, we feel great after having sex because of the feel-good hormones that our body releases during sex namely the oxytocin (sometimes called the love drug or the love hormone) and the endorphins. People inflicted with PCD however, feel “deep sadness or agitation,” even if the sex was consensual and even if it was “satisfying and enjoyable.” Some of them become “tearful or depressed after orgasm.” In some cases, others become “argumentative with their partner,” says International Society for Sexual Medicine.
In the past, it is believed that PCD is common among women only but recent study conducted by scientists from Queensland University of Technology in Brisbane, Australia showed that it is prevalent among men, too. The study, which was conducted online and internationally, had 1,208 male participants. It was revealed that 41 percent of the respondents experienced PCD “in their lifetime” while 20 percent said they experienced PCD four weeks prior to the study. Further, 3 to 4 percent of the participants admitted they experience PCD “on a regular basis.”
How do you know if you have postcoital dysphoria? Reportedly it’s when you don’t want to be touched, if you want to be left alone, and if you feel unsatisfied and annoyed after sex then you are most likely to be experiencing PCD.
But how bad is it for those who experience it, really? One of the respondents admitted feeling “self-loathing,” while another felt “a lot of shame.” This particular participant on the other hand, confessed that he “usually have crying fits and full on depressive episodes following coitus that leave my significant other worried . . . .”
Why experience this?
Experts theorized that PCD occurs when people are experiencing psychological distress, or if they experienced abuse, including “sexual, emotional and physical abuse in childhood and adulthood,” and if they have “several sexual dysfunctions.” In fact, the most common form of abuse reported by the participants of the study was emotional abuse which they suffered before and after age 16. On the other hand, 12.7 percent of the respondents revealed they suffered from sexual abuse as kids while 3.5 percent suffered from sexual abuse as adults. Further, 36.9 percent of the participants of the study revealed they suffer from depression, 32.5 percent of them suffer from anxiety, and 3 percent from bipolar disorder. You may read the study in full about postcoital dysphoria here and here.
One of the researchers, Joel Maczkowiack, told Reuters, “I would like to think that this study will help males (and females) reflect on their experience of sex, as well as encourage communication between partners about their experience.”
“In addition, we hope that this type of research will help people whose experience of sex is dysphoric (or dysphoric at times) to know that they are not the only ones who feel this way. In this sense, we hope this study normalizes a variety of human experiences following sex,” Maczkowiack said.
Hmmm, when younger and dealing with the possible implications of being attracted to males, my mind would race to places, usually positive and I would indulge the feeling. If I acted upon the feeling or masturbated to the thought of such actions, I realized that it often took me longer to ejaculate and I would have a sort of dull ringing in my ears, and feel really negative in that moment. I am sure there were many issues at hand: I recall feeling sad I would NEVER have kids (untrue), I would imagine how my life would change (unrealistic/unmet societal norms), and the one I could never quite fix, a notion of impending doom, often which I believed was systematically based on much earlier, repressed, abuse. Let’s just say for at least and hour and sometimes as long as a day (24 hrs) I felt a mild to heavy funk that I could not override. Fantasy was safe, it was always the possibility of reality that brought the negativity to the situation. My handsome boss [he in his 30s, me 17] would walk by and give me a strong rub on my shoulders and tell me to keep up the good work, the rub was great, the compliment made me ecstatic, the fact that I once walked in on him drunk and masturbating, semi-clothed in his office (he was in the middle of a rough divorce) and there were rumors of him taking home some of the ‘easier to get girls,’ but thing is he was a novice body builder and major athlete in high school, so he was fit, hairy, and handsome; he probably had no idea, and I certainly had no idea why, but his form sent me there! To this moment, I recall that I could have majorly taken advantage of that situation, at the very least, oral sex. Thing is, I don’t mess with fire, and he was a conflagration: married, messing around a lot, probably used drugs for pleasure and that physique as well … so I would not willingly go there. The reality was, in those moments I didn’t know how I would feel as we approach the end of the moment, and that impending doom I would inevitably feel. I recall actively knowing there would be another opportunity (I now wonder if he set them up, however, as I fantasized, I realized I was frightened by the thought of ‘tasting’ ejaculate. I looked it up online; there were others who felt like this, and they suggested that you could taste your own … damn, THERE it was. I hadn’t and could not do that, because every time I had an orgasm, the moment completely soured and I COULD NOT even imagine going there! It was the perfect storm: Norms & morés, religion & morals, and a heavy dose of repression and naïveté … it’s amazing that many of us make it successfully into adulthood relationships. I believe some will scoff at this topic, however, as I read, I had an epiphany about those moments … I put my 2¢ worth in a lot more on here, but I believe I just had a slower start than many. I made a lot of headway in my late 20s, and a bad relationship reinforced the stereotype that a lot of guys lie, I hadn’t had the PCD moments in a long time, these past two, very complicated years, have really caused me strife, time to get up, and dust myself off, again
Just as long as you explore yourself emotionally, mentally, Spiritually, take to your time; you’re coming or came-out, I’m assuming?
“Angles fear to tread, where fools just jump in,” that is to say, that even in my youth, I had that sense of caution that, normally, an older person have. What I got from the experience of going to church; ’cause I had to under mom’s roof, lol, was a sense of “Spirituality,” not programming
of the religion. “Reverence,” is a good thing.
And who cares about “societal-norms,” no such thing, or, as turns out; more dysfunctional as it ever was in every way, shape and form; if, you’re well informed enough to know that (self-educated) in the broadest sense.
Be your own trail-blazer in your own life, man and don’t, “follow the pack”, “know thy self”, “to thy own self, be true.” Always, get back up, my friend!
Maybe it’s because you hooked up with someone for the sole purpose of getting off and realized midstream they were someone you just weren’t at all attracted to?? Buyers Remorse, as it’s called.
That resonates with me, actually, I learned long ago, I felt that “emptiness” after the act of, well, in those days “tricking,” which is why I kept that or those kinds of encounters to a minimum. It’s even worse when you realize you really don’t even like ’em, an ‘ah-ha’ moment of growth of who you’re not and who you are. I found out, I’m not that kind of shallow, I still love a good-looking man, but I need substance.
Interesting read. Now I know what your condition is called. PCD
t.
It seems that we now live in a society that is obsessed with labeling to the point that we have labels within labels. It appears that PCD is symptomatic of a myriad of other negative factors where having sex itself is the trigger. If sex facilitates said trigger, then it seems that avoiding it would make the most sense. There are other ways to get off without subjecting someone else to feeling badly as well.
Honey, PCD happens my playmates when I put my big dick away and leave.
Seriously, though, I have never experienced that and if someone I was having sex with had that reaction it would be the last time I had sex with them. No need to invite drama in.
GWM, here, no PCD, nor HIV, nor STIs, not into BDSM, just a DTE guy ISO LTR, not NSA.
this is an old topic
Post coitum omne animalium triste est – After sex, all animals are sad. This is a shortened version of a Latin phrase, post coitum omne animal triste est sive gallus et mulier, which means ‘After sex all animals are sad except for roosters and women’. It is attributed to the Greek doctor and philosopher, Galen.
I dated a guy who had this. Sex was AMAZING to say the least. It lasted hours. A quickie with him as two hours. One of the best sex partners I’ve ever had. When we started staying at each other’s places overnight after a marathon sexathon, things got weird. We’d be exhausted laying in bed. I’d try to cuddle (and stuff my cock back into him throughout the night) and put my arm around him. He would slide away and get up several times to get some water. He’d lay back down and get right back up. In a king size bed wed be laying on the very edge. When he’d come back he’d lay on the opposite edge I was on. If I moved over he got up again. One day I caught him crying in the bathroom. Asked what’s up. He broke down. Didn’t know why he was feeling this way. The next day he’d stop by and we’d go right at it again. Sex you’d see in a porn with more passion then you could imagine. After sex he was a mess. I told him to go see a doc. Never did. We tried to live together but this def got in the way. Who knew it had a name. He was so awesome. This def led to our break up. I hope he got help. Jeff if you’re reading this I still miss you.
Wow what a fucking great story. Hot as hell. I don’t have this PCD or WFT problem and I’m not Jeff but I would love to meet you !!
Well at least that’s one more thing i don’t need to worry about, been alone for 30years now . Don’t get out much at all , why because i feel like that all others out there are laughing and looking at me saying to another or other OMG, he is a wierd 1. It is so hard to find the right person. Hell it’s hard enough just finding a friend out there . But i really try not let this get to me but it is very difficult and depressing
I’m not sure what all this means, but I know after my BF and I have sex, or we just do things together, it just makes me feel closer and more satisfied with him, and he with me. Depressed after having sex? not me, I just look forward to the next time we get together.