Capture d’écran 2018-02-24 à 18.18.59

Ricky Martin on “Normalizing” Open Relationships

(Photo Credits: Eva Rinaldi [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons)

“I want to normalize relationships like this.”

Speaking with Vulture about FX’s television series titled The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story, Ricky Martin said he met with Antonio D’Amico twice—the person he was portraying in the show—in order to prepare himself for the role.

The TV show by the way, is currently being aired every Wednesday at 10 p.m. on FX. It examines the tragic story of the world-renowned Italian fashion designer Gianni Versace and the events leading to his murder in 1997. D’Amico, Versace’s partner, was the one who found the designer’s body outside his Miami Beach mansion “lying on the steps with blood around him.”

Martin explained he simply wanted to do D’Amico’s love for Gianni Versace justice. And, in order for him to do that, he had to have an insight about the couple’s relationship which was, as it turned out, an open one. “I’m talking about bringing men into our lives. I’m talking about bringing escorts,” he said of his role. The character he was portraying was “very heavy” but the insight he gained from his meetings with D’Amico helped him show the level of commitment the couple had during the course of their 15-year relationship. “The level of security between them and trust between them is so solid.”

Further, Martin said, “We want to normalize another kind of reality for open relationships. And that’s what we’re doing.” For more information about the TV show The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story, click here.

In 2016, a study conducted in Australia revealed that majority or 32% out of their 2886 gay and bisexual respondents were in open relationships while 31% said they were in a monogamous relationship. The study further showed that 14% of their respondents were not having sex at all while others were only having casual sex (23%).

Thoughts? Sound off in the comments section below.

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  1. Francis Asissy

    Shut up, Ricky Martin. You’re a stupid celebrity, so just show off your body and your ego and keep quiet. Open relationships may be common, but they’re not normal, not something emulate or strive for. It may be fine for the greedy spouses who can’t get enough sex, but it sucks for the outsider who may like you and find you emotionally unavailable. You’re just using men as meat and you are setting a bad example of the gay community to the outside world. If we want acceptance and tolerance, we cannot publicize this sort of behavior, particularly as if it were normal. Monogamy is our cultural goal because it is preferable, more divine, and difficult to achieve.

  2. Francis Asissy

    And since it got Versace killed, it should be obvious to even you that opening a relationship is dangerous, it exposes your partner to harm, physically and emotionally, and that’s how AIDS got spread. So shut the fuck up about your fucking and your failed relationship.

  3. Allan

    Say what you want, but an “open” relationship is NOT a relationship at all! It is simply a convenience for narcissistic, weak people that don’t want to be truly caring, decent people. It’s like a disgusting epidemic anymore. Regardless of how many people agree with this atrocity, it is still a low-life method of open betrayal. Sickening

  4. J P phone home

    It’s the shunning
    Most families are basically man and woman for whether tradition or religious or just to be accepted.
    My theory is if you are not accepted by any peers you don’t need that. Just do what you need to do and move on. Peer pressure the bullying is bad. Eventually it will stop. To me it don’t bother me its the others around that makes matters worse and those are ones that are more disturbing. Even if you have children you know are gay they are still your children whether you like it or not is irrelevant no matter what YOU CANNOT FIX WHAT YOU HAVE we can only be happy and grateful we have each other. Sometimes life isn’t always a bed of roses we can’t all marry super models you know.

  5. Matt

    Monogamy is a heteronormative construct pure and simple.

    There are different types of monogamy.

    Sexual monogamy: “I will have sex only with you.”

    Emotional monogamy: “I will love only you.”

    Social monogamy: “We will appear monogamous in public.”

    Activity monogamy: “No one else does this but us.”

    Open relationships last longer.

  6. marc

    Good article. However, 32% is NOT a majority. The response with the highest percentage (32%) was “open relationship.” But a majority would have to be more than 50%.

  7. Mike

    disappointed in his statements that gay marriage WAS NOT ALLOWED TO DELIBERATELY OFFEND THE SANCTITY. All we need is a legal union to allow benefits! These coupoles make a sham of real marriage..before you get your panties twisted..straight and gay cheat and it’s not unique.. but it’s still cheating no matter how you try to normalize it! Just semantics and releasing GUILT OF OUR UPBRINGING, ??lol!

  8. Hunter4B

    DAVE, this is HUNTER the KIND & CARING HUNTER, (not Hunter500)

    Here is a link for you that makes the point I was trying to make in reply to the Gus Kenworthy story you posted a little more than a week ago …

    If your readers were to hear these words, it would be hard to say bad things about Gus, a man who struggles like the rest of us and a man who stands up for his community UNLIKE many who refused to own themselves, their sexuality, or the responsibilities those bring to our lives.

    Either way, thanks for always trying to be a positive force in the community, I try to back it up in what I respond and post.

    • Jake

      HUNTER4B, Gus is another spoiled liberal thinking brat. I read his tweet and from what it sounds like he is jealous that he isn’t as famous as Ivanka. As a gay guy I’m not struggling with who I am. I’m proud of who I am. I live my life as a guy not as a gay guy. The guy I’m dating is a gay Latino i the military and he thinks if the gays would just live they’re life as a guy and not put they’re sexuality in the face of everyone they would be happier with who they are.

      • Hunter0500

        Agreed Hunter4B with your assertion that being gay does not necessarily mean it drives all aspects of a guy’s life along the stereotypical lines and images prescribed as golden by some. Gay guys come with a variety of diverse charteristics, not just a narrow cluster most often promoted to and presented in the media.

        • Hunter4B

          NOT Gus’s tweet: His commentary (did you even check out the video link?). Also, for not having GAY drive ALL aspect of life, I certainly read A LOT of commentary here regarding OTHER’S spoiledness, jealousy, & right to share their gayness as THEY deem fit. Just like your BF has the right to just be a ‘GUY’ & not ‘Military,’ ‘Latino,’ or ‘GAY’ — Gus could easily ‘pass’ or not own his TRUTH — yet he does share, which I find greater than hiding behind your ivory-keyboard & being your GUY selfs! So bluntly: Me thinks the gentlemen doth protest TOO MUCH, and certainly ALL THE TIME …

  9. Lamar

    Hmm, I don’t know if I understand the point of “normalizing, open relationships”, maybe its where I live, but Martin and I live in the same portion of the same State. It (is) prevalent enough to be pretty ‘normal’ at present to encounter such as it is.

    Clearly, in the case of Versace, “he should have quite while he was ahead,” really, but also what is clear, there’s a difference in loving someone and being in love. I just can’t imagine being so blessed-gifted as he; yet in his head, it does not seem to have been ‘enough’, still, wanting more. Then losing it all, paying the biggest-costliest price of all… he did not weigh this out correctly at all to least bit.

    Personally, I just with one party; mutually best-friend-confidant, and one sexually wildly exciting lover in bed, period, no one else need apply for either of us, “mutual” is key…

  10. anonimatovato

    you do you ricky martin, but i’ll pass on that one. please don’t make it seem all gay men are into open relationships. that’s why we fought so hard for marriage equality?

  11. YoYo Mama

    Thank you for not posting my previous comment! Not understanding morality is not a reason to try to change it. Ricky Martin is no spokesman for anyone but his own ego and small talent.

  12. Rano

    Not my type, but I would love to watch them making love especially how Ricky response when the other guy penetrate him. I wonder who has a nicer cock

  13. Jordan

    This is great! Thank you for helping remove the stigma around open relationships. I’ve been in an open relationship for about 6.5 years and we are getting married in August. We plan to remain open. So many in the gay community want to demonize and shame those of us who have happy, functional, open relationships, and that’s not okay. I’m happy to see this. 😀

    • Dave

      Everyone is allowed to do what makes them happy. The guys that are “against” it are probably not ok with it in their own relations.
      Enjoy Jordan!

  14. Hunter0500

    Open relationships seem the most normal for gay guys. Few of the gay guys I know seek monogamy. Good for them if that’s what those few want. Monogamous relationships can and do happen, but they tend to be few and far between for gay guys. They’re great for anyone enamoured by the concept of “true love” or a “soul mate” they’d have forever. But they are rare and often end tragically because one partner doesn’t adhere to the agreement.

    Say, what happened to the post here asking for true love stories before Valentine’s Day?

    Open relationships, or even Friends With Benefits relationships that endure for years, might be a better fit for many gay guys. Care needs to be taken, of course, on who is invited into the group.

    It’ll be interesting to see how Martin covers the Versace story, which includes a murder that rocked the fashion world and gays enamoured with the lives of rich and famous gays to their cores. Versace was murdered by Andrew Cunanan, a gay serial killer who also killed a number of other well-established gay men. It’ll be interesting to see how Martin normalizes Open Relationships in light of the murder(s).

  15. Owen

    One has to define the difference between being sexually compulsive, which many gay men are after years of anonymous sex with hundreds, if not thousands of men, and people who are truly capable of being polyamorous. Unfortunately for most of these men, they have long gone beyond the point of being able to sustain a monogamous relationship with just one man. As a Psychotherapist in practice for many years, I have found that for these men, the best course is one of “don’t ask-don’t tell-don’t bring it home. It is simply more realistic in terms of the relationship succeeding. I still believe in the passionate love that can be shared exclusively between two people. The kids who hooked up early in the game seem to have the best shot here.

  16. Ron

    Monogamy rules with me in my life!
    Sorry to hear you say those things Ricky, I always admired you and thought you would also be a monamist! Not so much anymore.

  17. vigggo

    I doubt this will ever be read, but here it comes. Recently widowed from a 35 year long open marriage, I can say it was always the best fit for us. When our relationship started, we sat down and had the talk. The 3 points I brought to the discussion was the expectation and possible outcomes of an open marriage. 1…I expect discretion, not monogamy. 2…NEVER endanger my health. 3…DO NOT fuck our friends. These seemed to be guilt free guidelines that we both could live with, and for 35 years we did. Was it perfect? not always. We both agreed that sport fucking was fun and it was only cheating if a truly romantic attachment was allowed to form. I sent my husband on many a separate vacation and was happy to have him come home, he did the same for me. Love and marriage are complicated. However 2 people can make it work, let them.

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