Survey: Are You Willing to Go Verse?
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From top to bottom, bottom to top. Would you ever consider or try switching your sexual role preferences once in a while if you were asked by your partner or regular fuck buddy?
We are asking because we stumbled upon this thread over at Reddit about a top who bottomed for the first time. He confessed he liked it, adding that he and his boyfriend had taken to switching every now and then. He is now a verse top and he said their sex life got a lot better.
We asked you before if you’ve ever fantasized about fucking a top and there’s quite a significant yeses there. Some readers even shared they actually got to experience their fantasy in real life but the question is: would the tops here in A4A be willing to get topped?
For our tops out there, have you always been strictly top? Has bottoming ever crossed your mind? Would you consider bottoming if your boyfriend or fuck buddy asks you to? Conversely, what about our bottoms: have you ever tried or fantasized about topping or are you a total bottom?
Would you guys consider going verse if you were asked by your partner? Why or why not? Do you think sex role preferences pose an issue on relationships?
Anyway, there is a study that said “versatiles seem to enjoy better psychological health.” According to the scientists who conducted the study this could be attributed to “their greater sexual sensation seeking, lower erotophobia (fear of sex), and greater comfort with a variety of roles and activities.” To our verse A4A members, how true is this for you (To read the study in full, click here)? Would you say that your sex life gotten a lot better when you decided to go verse?
Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below.
On three conditions: that he’s not that large, that we’re a “committed couple” and only with a glove, yeah, I have done anything that my babe wanted.
I used to only top. Then, for various reasons, I kearned to bottom . It was enjoyable, but when I got introduced to total body “assgasms”, I suddenly realized what my buddies (and gf’s) were experiencing under me. Now that I can confidently top again, I have become a much better top, as a result of my experience.
Do I still like to bottom?
HELL YEAH! Nothing beats those assgasms! But true Topmen who take the time, last long enough, and have the technique (or interest) to do that job right are, IME, rare.
In my humble opinion, topping a man is sort of like training to be a Dom: You need to start on the bottom.
Vers/btm here, LOVE bottoming, but enjoy topping occasionally. Really LOVE getting my ass eaten and then fucked…and eaten again, but also enjoy eating a hot ass and then fucking it!
I’m more of a bottom but if he wants it I’ll go verse with him. As long as I get my ass stuffed (safely) leaving me good and sore I’m happy and will be glad to top him too The only time I go total top is when I hook up with a young small framed twink. Something about them is so fuckable – I don’t care if I get topped or not in that situation.
Yes, but only after marriage. I would not trust a stranger not to hurt me. And I would probably have to have hemorrhoid surgery first. I would rather have a mangine created in between, but cleaning it out afterwards would be disgusting.
for me I’m a 100% dedicated total bottom.proud to be a bottom and won’t be talked out of it.guys that I’m fb with except me being strictly bottom and find it more arousing and love how driven i promoted I am about it!
I am vers and always have felt that way, though I don’t meet guys very often. I have a local bud who is a top, but he certainly enjoys my cock in him!
I am considered a Dom top because of my stamina, intensity and size, but years ago in my 20s I thoroughly enjoyed bottoming on occasion but gave it up because I rarely came across a truly vers guy. Guys would say I will top you if you want- but after that statement who would want them too? Or more puzzling were the bottoms who would profess that they wanted to be topped by a real man, denoting they were less than a man for being a bottom.
Prob 60 percent of guys I have topped over the years from A4A, their profiles said top but they sent me a message and it happened. Thus, by my estimates less than 5-10% of guys are truly total tops. Moreover, of that group some like giving head, being spanked, etc. and all too many bottoms believe their total top wants nothing but to be sucked and topping them. This means that that conservatively there is likely 5x more total bottoms than total tops. The discrepancy climbs when you consider that many so called vers guys really mean they have the equipment but are not actively seeking to use it.
Lastly, there is the reality that a distinguished older top will still have plenty of options, but the older distinguished total bottom finds his options are limited! Thus, when a younger guy cockily professes to be a total bottom that can take this and take that, I advise them to try and become vers because you lose all your power by having only one trick! They never listen telling me what they enjoy! Truth be told, I haven’t been topped in over 15 years and when done right it is one of bear feelings in the world, but feeling like a commodity because the top had so many other options that day or another day made me rethink my roles in favor of stability and to be the desired and limited resource as a top! Hope I don’t offend anyone!
Then a dildo will do! It does exactly, without demands, what I want it to do and when I want it. With my guidance, it ALWAYS hits the G-suit (prostate and seminal gland) which is not the case with most “tops”.
Then a dildo will do! It does exactly, without demands, what I want it to do and when I want it. With my guidance, it ALWAYS hits the G-spot (prostate and seminal gland) which is not the case with most “tops”.
I’d LOVE to be able to top but due to age and diabetes I can’t get hard enough to top, even though I was soft, I have done the fucking motions on a bottom guy and it was a LOT of fun. But I’d prefer to be able to actually penetrate.
Me too Ed, diabetes took away my boner.
If you are in a “relationship” why would you not be versatile to your partner. Being “just” being a Top or a Bottom seem selfish. I’ve had the honor and pleasure of being in a couple of relationship; a long term sexual friendship. My experience has been when both of were versatile our friendship or relationship was far more fulfilling, to be able share in each others desires or wishes sexually, be it giving, receiving or mutually sharing those passions at the same time. I’ve also met a couple men over the years, who will Only Top or Only Bottom and would not deviate from their stated roles; would not reciprocate in anyway to their partner outside parameters of being a Top or Bottom and pose an issue on our friendship and relationships which sadly did not last long. My two cents on this topic – GentlemannRSM
PS. To those of you who Only Top or Bottom, I have no issue with you men. as the old song goes “Different Strokes for Different Folks”
DL top dude here. I’m married (to a female), but enjoy gagging and pounding out other dudes on the low. However, I’ve always dreamed of this one masc dude who I can chill and be bros with in the street, but behind closed doors we’d have this secret relationship and if be his bitch! In essence, if I ever was to secretly fall in love with another brotha, hell yeah I’d consider changing positions every now n then. It’ll take a while, as I’ve NEVER bottomed before, but yeah… I’d definitely give it a try!
Bi married here myself. I bottom more with guys but also like to pound a nice ass. Nothing better than two guys fucking away on each other.
Been there tried that. Im a top and only a top. Wont ever bottom again, not even for god.
I’ve been asked a few times to switch to the top my fb … .figured out pretty quick I am 100% bottom. I definitely was not comfortable in the role so we quickly went back to out normal places and we were both happy.
I am most definitely a top. Though if I had a long term bf who wanted to try and fuck me, I would gladly entertain the thought of bottoming for him and finding a way to make it work if I knew it would give him pleasure and make him happy
I think the reason question is why are so many afraid to, more specifically, bottom? And I’ll tell you why. Society. As a man, you don’t bottom. You top. You fuck. You don’t get fucked. Those are for the pussy bottoms. The submissive guys. Getting fucked makes them feel less of a man. So they don’t. Sure, most of them are the closet cases but I’ve had my fair share of out gay men saying they would never bottom because they are men. They top only. The gay community and all it’s labels is such a fucked up place.
I am usually bottom, but if a cute guy is short and thin like me, I enjoy the rare chance to top. Love those cute Asian bottoms.
The ‘study’ is almost 15 years old, times have changed!
Yes, I’ve gone verse. It’s a lot more fun than being a total top all the time. It’s an option that can add spice to your sex life, you never know when your bottom has the most amazing dick, it’s hard and he’s interested in using it…
If you are all top or all bottom, you are missing half the fun.
Im a bottom, and I have topped less than 5 times in my life. I prefer receiving…and will continue to do so.
I’m a total top & don’t like anything touching or around my butt. It’s for exit only!
So I will not change. You knew I was a total top from day 1.
I also knew a guy who was a total Top but he went to Chicago and got the Malcom X syndrome. From that time, he turned his back on me.
If it a small peanut dick,I will.I love asshole,but I do lick big boys at times too.
Yes it’s great best of both worlds
I’ve always been a top. Never wanted to bottom. My recent ex begged me one day to try. He was smaller so I thought I could accommodate him. It wasn’t so bad, I got more enjoyment that it was pleasing him then it pleasing me. I wound up always bottoming for the rest of our relationship.
I’ve bottomed once since we split and it wasn’t the same. I still say I’m a top now but I wouldn’t say that I wouldn’t never bottom again for the right guy.
98% of gay guys have bottomed. If a top says they don’t bottom he is not real, the best vers Tops were vers bottoms, or are still bottoms.
Vers tops do it better because they know what motions feel good to a bottom from experience.
I’m a total top but fantasize about being a bottom too. I love being rimmed. The reason I haven’t bottomed is because I’m extremely tight. : (
Any suggestions?
Get some lube and some Advil. Then enjoy the ride.
Yea bro, u suggest u find a bro who u r comfortable with and that would take the time to open u up, the more relaxed, comfortable and turned on with the other person u r, u will open right up and enjoy it, trust me u dont want ur 1st time being a man busting u wide open and u hurting and dreading anything else in the future.
what I have found most top only guys are selfish. They want to hurt you slam it in dry. Had a hot young hung black top he started out good slow n easy till balls deep then said I am gonna give you some “nigger dick” n he proceeded to try n slamming in. Lol I put my knee on his chest n shoved him off me. And said to him if he was gonna try n give it like that he was gonna take it like that 1st. He turned tail and ran out. Versa men are the best lover’s ..
If he had waited for a few minutes and got me going with the flow. He could have pounded my ass forever. But don’t think your gonna stick it in n slam my brains out in the first 30 seconds. That might be ok in the porn movies but not in my bed. My friend Mike has 8.5+ thick he gets me going properly and can slam fuck as good as any porn star but being he is versa knows when to turn up the action. Not in the first 30 seconds. I started as a total bottom and soon saw my options were limited as such. So when Enrique asked me to top him. And I found out I loved it too. Since then versa all the way!!!
Same here
I have ben predominantly btm for most of my sexually active life. Moreover, I am a somewhat dominant btm with a 9-inch dick so I guess it didn’t take too much effort for me to top. And recently, that is exactly what started happening. Now, while approaching my late 30’s, I consider myself to be fully vers and that has opened up my dating options to a wider range of possibilities.
“Are You Willing to Go Verse?”
Somehow it’s makes guys who are sound like some kind of freaks. Like they’re supposed to declare and remain “top” or “bottom” for some odd reason.
Some guys like oral; some don’t.
Some guys prefer to give; some to receive.
Some like to kiss; some don’t.
Some like to rim; some don’t.
Some like to be rimmed; some don’t.
Some are tops; some are bottoms.
And, yes, some do both of the last.
And some do all or some of all of the above.
And some do and don’t do a myriad of other sexual options.
Is there fantasy to any of it? I guess for some, yes.
For me, personally, it’s all part of the textured fabric of man-to-man sex. A wonderful thing it is! And there are all kinds of guy who are willing to do any or all of the parts with you if you take the time to find them and discuss what parts of the fabric you both prefer.
Textured fabric???
= variety. And a good one. Lot’s of quality to be part of and to experience.
I have always been verse and it sure makes for a hell of a lot more fun and longer session.
I used to be a bottom slut. I loved being fucked! But then i met a hot guy who loved to be fucked. Have basically a Vers top since. I really enjoy having sex with Vers guys. No holes barred, flip fucks are great!
I’ve never really understood guys who aren’t versatile. I’ve been verse as long as I’ve been having sex…. Which has been a long time! I think sex would get boring very quickly if I were always just a top or just a bottom. I enjoy both positions. I got close to dating a guy once until he told me he was strictly a top and would never bottom. Turned me right off being attracted to him.
Hmmm, when I’m playful, I can top only with ease. I’m very picky when I bottom. I definitely prefer a strong gentleman. I don’t know if it’s eye contact, the feeling being inside me or whatever gets some kind of stare when I’m on my back. Then the collapse on top of me and I just hold him until he gets ready to pull out. Like really, who could choose just one mode?
I prefer being a bottom but if the guy I am with wants to get fucked also I will try it but I don’t always stay hard enough for topping someone and I don’t know why because its always been that way for me not just as I have gotten older. from the responses here it sounds like there are way more tops out there than either bottoms or versatile guys but where I live I have a very hard time trying to find a top there are so few around.
I’m 100% bottom, although that hasn’t always been the case. I’ve tried to top a few times over the last couple years, but it seems it seems that I’m not terribly adept at it any longer. I certainly don’t want to give anyone mediocre dick, so I’ll probably stick to bottoming.
I been Toping since I started.
I have no desire to be verse with anyone.
I have a very big butt and I get so tired of ignorant guys saying your butt too big for you to be a Top. Like it’s FREAKING ANNOYING AS HELL.
Also, guys cheat too much for me to consider that. I really would have been in Jail for letting a dude hit this and I catch him with someone else.
I am good. I will stay in my Top Lane,
Thanks
Keep up the good Top work!
So yea I have been a top since I started having sex with guys at the age if 24 now 26, guess cause I am 6’3″ and 230 lbs strong body and phat ass, I’ve always been picky and I loved it when my ex gf ate my ass so when I found a guy I liked and who would fulfill my curiosity of topping me I went right ahead (I have always been a person who liked being sure of what I wanted, and wanted to know if I am strictly top or verse) he ate me like a pro opened me up and romanced me and I was ready like a waiting bottom, it felt great and for a guy that last as long as I did he only lasted 10 minutes saying I was too tight and sexy, but in all honesty after we were finished I knew bottoming wasn’t for me, now that I think about it I guess partly is because I would have tried it again with him but he was always trying to get into my ass and I didn’t wanna be seen as that alone, so I broke it off with him and states top, aside from that my ass is really tight and just straining to shit causes me to bleed on occasions so I wouldn’t allow anyone up my ass ever unless I trust them and they respect me.
BI MWM here, always topped. Just like I always would get sucked by a guy but not suck. Then I started sucking and loved it and became damn good at it. I tried bottom now and again unsuccessfully, then I got toped by a guy who really wanted my ass because he knew it would be so tight. And I was scared because it would have been the biggest I ever tried. He was awesome and he sold me. Still mostly top. But bottom for the right guy
I used to be a btm until I had to have surgery, that was 17 years ago and now I am strictly a top. I have thought about being a btm but it scare me about having my ass ripped again
I’m an honest 10 inches so I’m very desired as a top because all the bottoms want the bragging rights to having taken a big thick dick up their asses. I don’t even need to exist because all I am to those kind of people is a big hard cock. I can accept that. My friend is a thick 9 incher and he is sought after as a top for the same reason. Sure we fuck the willing and curious because why not? The two of us, however, fuck each other and we really like spending hours and hours naked and doing all sorts of sex.
Sounds hot! Where are y’all located? Would luv to join in and make it a small party.
You said it right. Ya get your partner ready and they will be begging for it. That’s the kicker for me if you eat my ass and get me ready I’ll be ready to take any 10 &9″. But if you just put a little spit on my hole don’t even think of dry slam fucking me
I used to bottom only and ran into so many other bottoms and we were both horny. I got the best dick of my life from another bottom May 2017 back in vegas. I’m very confused and dont care if a guy says he’s a top or bottom. I’m versatile now. Enjoy both equally esp. if the guy i’m topping is small frame and tops are 5’10 or taller and hairy muscular to football player build
I was married to a woman, and was obviously the top. When I came out at 30, I had very little M2M experience, and had someone who taught and allowed me to take both roles…and I enjoyed them both.
When I was with my long-term partner, he joked we were both “middles” since we each enjoyed both roles. As time went on, and I became older, I started having some ED functions making it a challenge to stay hard during the act of penetration., sometime even with viagra, etc. But I would do what I could do to please myself and my partner, often putting his pleasure above mine, and that was fine.; it’s a give and take.
Now single again, I happily will bottom, but only if the guy is 7″ or less, because for me, bigger is not better. And there’s are times that everything aligns (and yes, some of it is the mental connection) and I can fully perform well as the top.
All that said, my personal opinion is that guys are missing out on some pleasure if they do not switch and at least try the other position…and, like me, find that size that works for you. I enjoy a great connection, and have been very, very lucky to find sexual partners who are patient, understanding and vers…and will aim to please me as well as himself. That’s when the cuddling afterwards is most comfortable. Enjoy and be safe.
I’m wired to mount, fuck, inseminate. I love fucking men! Everything else is foreplay to me. My cock feels three feet long when I’m bull fucking an eager stud. But gay dating life can be very thin in my remote locale. After a period of bedroom play with another equally horned up top buddy of mine we agreed it was good fun but ultimately a bit frustrating. So we decided to give a flip fuck a try instead of the rump romping back squirting we’d resorted to. If I can take it you can take it too ’cause I really wanta fuck you ragged, buddy…
Subsequent attempts proved futile for me but I did manage to fuck my friend… it was sooooo fucking hot!!! But I just couldn’t get his cock in my butt. We resorted to poppers and I soon found myself wriggling on the end of a big ol’ dick and taking my buddy’s load in my guts. With a snoot full of that popper shit I find it hard to tell who’s fucking who really. I found it hotter’n hell what we were doing… trading 20 strokes then flipping… back and forth. We’ve actually gotten pretty good at it. I like my buddy fucking me… not quite as much as I like fucking him but it’s hot to my pervy mind to manfuck with the kind of muscular, testosterously driven enthusiasm me and my buddy generate. But the thrill for me remains what we’re doing together. I’ve gotten where I can get his dick in me w/out the poppers but it’s not as easy. Truth is… I like fucking and will go butt up for a buddy if it’s as important to him as it is to me and I’m gonna get my turn to plow him back. I don’t mind at all that most guys seem perfectly content for me to get on top… fine by me. But I’ve grown to enjoy getting plowed by my buddy… remains to be seen if that would be true with somebody else. But my pleasure remains something other than the mere act of bottoming. I still don’t like the sensation. Feels just like having a dick shoved up your ass to me.
Flip fucking is the way to go. You learn new skills experiencing both sides of the equation resulting in being a better top and bottom for it. Plus you extend your play time significantly flipping since you don’t have to keep your end (which ever it is) up all the time and can recover for two, three or four rounds of man sex through a long evening.
Exactly
I love to bottom but remember the guy that had me on my back and fucking away. Pulled out and climbed on my and sat down. We both had awesome orgasm and I would do it again anytime
I was a total top in a monogamous LTR for close to 20 years. Towards then end, I wanted to experiment with bottoming, but partner was unwilling to be vers. Now single, I always list myself as “Vers”, not “Top/Vers”. I find myself topping about 75% of the time mostly due to both the ease of finding bottoms and the fact that so many men who identify publicly as “Top” really do flip when offered an opportunity. Quite honestly, the best “Tops” are those who identify as “Vers”. Vers men seem to know the needs of the bottom best.
I’m a bottom more out of default. I last only a few seconds topping. I’m able to have much better orgasm when I’m riding a guys cock. Absolutely amazing full body orgasms. For me it beats just a few seconds of pleasure and it’s over. I could top if the other guy really wanted me to and would be understanding that I don’t last long.
I was always a top, but I was always curious what it was like to bottom. I met someone on Adam, and after a few months of great sex I decided to try out bottoming. Now all we do is flip fuck. I enjoy being a bottom just as much as a top. I can ride a cock with the best ’em!
I use to be just a Top but once i tried Bottom i love it just as much. I love the feeling of my lover filling me with his love deep inside. I’m totally Verse now and i’ll always be.
I would only consider it with someone I was in a committed relationship with. I’m not all that huge on anal in general, which is probably and unfortunately why I cannot seem to get with any guys, but guys fail to see beyond the surface: having been a victim of that horrible four-letter-word, rape, I can’t just hook up like that.
It just goes to show you that if the LGBT community was better about being vulnerable and communicating, those surface labels of “prude” and “top-only” and “oral-only” images might open our hearts and minds up to real connections and a better improved self-confidence, even if we want to just hook up.
I am a top,I love being a top and I love the h*ll out of bottom men,I have taste ass that was better than pussy,no lie here,I like pussy too!I will suck dick if I know it’s a clean one!
I agree I’m 4.5 I dont top