Sexuality: Straight Men Are Very Curious About Gay Sex
Straight guys are a staple in gay men’s fantasies, but a new book reveals that gay sex might just be as popular in straight men’s minds as they are in gay men’s.
The book, Everybody Lies, is written by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz and examines America’s online searching habits. One of Stephens-Davidowitz’ findings would not be surprising to any Adam4Adam user who’s had sex with a married man on the down low: there are a higher number of closeted men in America than you think.
In an interview with Vox, Stephens-Davidowitz revealed that his data suggests that about five percent of men are predominantly attracted to men, which is two percent higher than what is believed.
Other findings aren’t as surprising. For one, there may be more closeted men in the South than there would be in New York. Stephens-Davidowitz points out that while fewer men in places like Mississippi admit to being gay, “gay porn searches are about the same everywhere.” It also doesn’t come as a surprise that women in the South are searching whether their husbands are gay or not.
“The number one question that women have about their husbands is whether he is gay. And these questions are much higher in the Deep South, where my research suggests there are indeed more gay men married to women,” explains Stephens-Davidowitz.
Some of Stephens-Davidowitz’ other findings include young men being more attracted to elderly women and overweight women, and “about 20 percent of the porn women watch is lesbian porn. A lot of straight women watch lesbian porn.”
Do these findings surprise you? More importantly, if you’ve had an encounter with those closeted Southern men, tells us the details! Share your stories with us in the comments section below!
Hi, I am new in this roll, always has being with a women, less than a year ago I had my first MM experience and most of the guys I had sex with are married, or in closet as I am, I travel all the south and is impressive how married man look to be penetrated, up to now, I always being top, but loving guys bodies and specially ass and mouth it is impressive how good sex I am having, never fell a lot of sensations with a woman as I am doing it with men
These findings come as no surprise to me. All you need do is create a profile on a gay website such as A4A and watch the men-married-to-women come flocking to your virtual doorstep. I haven’t kept records, but I estimate about a third acknowledge their marital status in their profiles. The remaining two-thirds don’t admit to being married until the chat conversation turns to arranging a meeting. That’s when they confess that they’re married and can’t get away from “the little woman.” This phenomenon includes men in their 20s who’ve been married less than 5 years to men in their 60s or older who’ve been married for decades.
It’s all great fun for married men who fantasize about hooking up with another man, but it is more than a little frustrating to those of us who want to meet another man for NSA or something more lasting – then have our time wasted by men who are actually unavailable.
It’s not something I would over think, personally. It’s as simple as “latent” bisexuality; just wanting to shake things up in their sexual-lives, like a bucket list or something, maybe “its always been there” just that humanity has become more open-comfortable with sexual “fluidity.” you know how some men are, lol, sexually adventurous, like the “sexing out side of your race thing” just something more to conquer? One more notch or a sort? Might even just be some sort of power thing, even… No big deal anyway, not these days.
DECADES ago, Masters and Johnson said that sexual orientation was a continuum between being with the same sex on one end and the opposite sex on the other. Gay and straight say that sexuality is binary, all or nothing, nothing in between. Many men who are attracted to other men do not want to be gay–partially due to the stigma in society about gay=panzy–but also because the gay community has embraced a snowflake, rainbow-unicorn, political stance that is bigoted and intolerant. I adore sex with men. People know I have sex with men. I’m also not gay because I refuse to be a suck boy to the clusterfuck of rainbow pride which is the new closet that the Liberals want men like me to stay.
Yes, there is no hard line between Gay and Straight. We learned that long ago.
This blog should really have been titled, “Straight Men … who present themselves as straight but are on the spectrum … Are Very Curious About Gay Sex.”
This blog should really have been titled, “Men Who Are Curious About Sex With Other Men”
I FIND A LOT OF MARRIED CLOSETED BI MEN IN HHI. NOT A REAL SURPRIZE TO ME. VARIETY!!
Doesn’t surprise me at all. In fact it only solidified what I already knew. The down side to straight men having any sort of sex with a gay man is that someone (probably both) will be hurt. My friend, whom I’ve known for many years though not as intimate) began coming around more regularly than ever before. I’ve found him attractive. One evening while having drinks and smoking dope, he asked if I he could buy a movie. I said yes. Well the movie was straight porn. Soon enough he came out of the bathroom with tissue and declared, I’m going to rub one out. This was the beginning of a nearly 2 year relationship. I call it a relationship because over the next year almost two we did what most couples do. We slept together, cooked, cleaned, spent our days, and even pooped without hesitation. The only thing missing was all out sex. But each day and night we masturbated together. I fell in love with him. When I disclosed my feelings it was the beginning of the end. We still get along but those days of intimacy are gone forever. I reminding him it was he who pulled “it” out first. He who asked that I suck it, he kissed me first and he asked that I Fuck him. Yet it was horrific that I express my feelings. I. Once asked how he would feel if Jessica Alba were on that other couch playing with herself instead of me and he could not do anything to be close how he would feel. I told him that’s exactly how he made me feel. Isolated, drawn in but only so far, played then discarded. The point is, if there is no emotional attachment then go for it. But its a slippery slope. We still talk. Rarely. Though I know he loves me, he will always be the one that got away. Love you Jacob!
Bring them on, I love having sex with straight guys. But, don’t tell them they are actually bi or gay in denial, because I want them to stay masculine and private. If you have sex (oral or anal) with another man, you are no longer straight……..shhhh, don’t tell them.
This post definitely applies to the men I attract. My tastes are very open as far as the physical goes and I’m laid back as well so maybe that’s what puts me in “safe gay” territory for straight guys. I’m in the deep South and a tour de force of gay challenges. African American, wow he’s gay type that deals with the onslaught of rejection from most other gays because of race first and foremost followed by other gay disqualifications at some point. Straight guys tend to be an escape from those frustrations for the most part. There are so many components for why straight guys do gay deeds. Porn is very open, available, and has staggering variety. I think that’s one of the major hey try this, that, or try it all fantasy land that has the guy next door literally bending over on your couch for example. The lines are highly blurred and I do believe guys that are totally straight are solidly so. I also believe that those alpha straight guys have weaknesses at some points too when he wants it drained but doesn’t want to deal with females so then he finds a convenient trans, fem, or whatever type guy lurking on the straight sites. Technology has really exposed so much more behavior in so many ways. Personally, I love to figure guys out. As far as straight guys the question is how far will he go and I’ve seen it lead to male+male marriage. From my own experience, the guy has the identity issue and frantically marries a woman with 5 kids or is uncomfortable having developed a full fledged relationship with a guy. I never wanted to understand that btw but hey life’s life. I’m at an age now where I deal with the straight guys. Do their fantasies and keep my guard up and expectations low. What else can you do when gay life’s so overcomplicated?
I was straight and I did indeed think about “gay” sex. Now I’m bi and I still think about it.
As a married man in the south who is also VERY attracted to guy on guy sex, this is not surprising at all….now, if all these closeted married guys could just find each other….
Adam needs to advertise for this group better. We need each other, lol.
Straight men are only curious about gays ex because they’re not straight. I don’t understand the concept of this. This continues to be a trend that people believe in. There is no such thing as a straight man who has sex with men. I’m gay, and I would never have sex with a woman, for pleasure, or any other reason. Gay men have sex with men and closeted men have sex with men. Not straight guys. I get the whole fantasy thing but it’s not real.
Straight men are fun!!! They sure love to breed and be bred
Not a surprise! In my opinion we are all bi and just fall on different level of the spectrum.
I am from the deep south and so far back in the closet light doesn’t even reach me.
I to am married, we dated, got married and by the time realized this was not for me she got pregnant.
We had a son who was born with multiple medical problems….. so doing what I felt was the right thing to do put my personal needs and desires on the shelf being a good dad I stayed so he would have medical support and not put all the burden on her. Some in the gay family do not understand and only live for themselves to party and look for constant hook up’s. and say why did you stay. It is because my desires are less important now till he is on his own maybe then I can move on with my life with what time I will have left. Yes I like to have an occasional hook up usually with other married men I meet on here. This site is my relief and thank you for all the work you do. So see being married is not what all you hear or see. Walk one day in my shoes and you know why I am still in the closet not for me but for my son. Sometime another married man is not just sex but a friend to talk too. So don’t judge all married men if they have a ring on their finger..there may be a reason why.
Your reasoning is lost on gay men. Being devoted to your kids is the epitome of being a man and a FATHER. Self sacrifice for a true greater good is beyond people who can only think of themselves and can’t identify at all in the world beyond the context of sensations from their dick and ass. Bravo sir.
Very much they do that why they called dl lol
I agree we are all on a spectrum. As a married man, I disagree with Dallas’ comment above. I happen to have other married friends who feel as I do…we love the release and man-on-man connection for recreation and a break from what society has deemed “normal” for centuries. Each of us go back to our daily lives, have no intention of changing our marital situation, but do enjoy the release and sex without attachments.
I also have gay friends who have been married for over 30 years, and they play with other partners. I also have a friend who has been gay his entire life, is married to a man, and is now experimenting with women, so it does happen both ways!
“Each of us go back to our daily lives, have no intention of changing our marital situation, but do enjoy the release and sex without attachments.”
Exactly. Well said.
You hit the nail on the head.
This is not surprising at all. I’ve noticed over the years how much straight guys talk about being gay, or gay things, or do gay things to each other, like grab each others privates, talk about fucking each other in the butt or swallowing each others cum. Act all femmy. Stuff like that. And they act like this is fun and normal to them. Then when a guy they suspect is gay is around, they harass him and say disgusting things about them. Saying things like how un-natural it is that that person is gay. Has anyone ever noticed that?
Guys like sex. Period.
Being an “older” gay male, I certainly have had sex with various married men. I totally understand the fellow who stayed “straight” for his son’s sake. Not all gay men are only interested in themselves and how their dicks feel. The first time I had sex with a married man, he was so scared that I would tell on him. I told him that what he does is not my concern. It is his life to live as he sees fit. I LOVE cock and always find it exciting when the sex is with a married man. I always wonder if I suck better dick than his wife, or about how many women did he sleep with before finally trying cock. I would love to hear more stories about this.
I’m a mwm with a fantasy of being bound and fucked but a guy. I consider myself straight because I only have interest in women, for relationships or sex in general. But this particular fantasy is about the domination. Sure, I could be pegged by the wife, and that would also appeal to my fantasy. But my wife would not be into that, and from a domination standpoint, a guy is simply a greater submission in my mind. I’ve not acted on this fantasy, and truth be told, I don’t know if I could. Because at the end of the day, I’m not into guys, and it’s a huge mental block regardless of how hot I find the fantasy to be.