Sexuality: Reasons Why Straight Guys Sleep With Men
Photo credit : Raging Stallion
If we take porn as a kind of barometer of what gay men are into sexually, it appears that straight men are oftentimes a part of the mix. Numerous gay porn sites got their starts with straight models. “Straight Guys” are a separate category on numerous free tube sites. This site even says it can help you sleep with straight guys without them even knowing.
The reasons why gay men are so drawn to straight guys are easy enough to understand. A lot of us probably had a crush on a straight guy when we were young, and some of us may have even fixated on them ever since. There’s also the fact that it’s thrilling knowing that this straight guy is doing something with you he wouldn’t usually do.
What’s murkier are the reasons why straight men sleep with guys. While not a comprehensive list by any measure, here are some reasons we came up with as to why straight men end up in bed with another man.
They’re not out yet. If the comments to this previous Adam4Adam blog post are any indication, the main reason why straight guys sleep with guys is because they’re not actually straight at all. Maybe it’s their religion, maybe they live in a hyper-masculine culture, maybe they’re just scared. So they maintain that they’re straight…at least for now.
It’s macho if you’re not the bottom. Back in a May 2002 issue of The Advocate, Gael Garcia Bernal was quoted as saying “It’s hard to explain; it’s a Mexican idiosyncracy, but you’re more macho if you fuck men, you know?” It’s not inconceivable that this mindset isn’t just something that exists in Mexico. In fact, if you go all the way back to Ancient Greece, the top was associated with masculinity, higher social status, and adulthood, while the bottom was associated with femininity, lower social status, and youth.
It’s just a phase. If you’re lucky, you were probably told “It’s just a phase” when you first started feeling something for guys. And while that may not be the case for most of us, for some guys it really was just a phase. If you’re the guy he experimented with, good for you. And no, not because you bagged a straight guy, but because he trusted you enough to do something so intimate with you.
They’re into drag queens. If you’ve watched any season of RuPaul’s Drag Race — but particularly Season Six onwards — you’ll know that there are some men out there who will have sex with drag queens only if they stay in drag. So if you’re already a drag queen, maybe you just need to find the right straight guy.
They’re gay for pay. Just like we said at the top of this story, a lot of porn sites started out featuring straight guys doing decidedly not straight things, and while some of those models weren’t really straight, some of them are straight. The Tyra Banks Show even dedicated an episode on it!
These are just some of the reasons we think straights guys end up sleeping with gay guys. Have any other reasons as to why they do this? Share it with us in the comments section below!
I met a guy that has turned into a very good friend on another site. We never hooked up, but became good friends. We discuss our hookups and all things sexual.
He looks very young and one guy asked him to wear women’s clothes. My friend complied.
It is absolutely unbelievable how many super hot, otherwise straight guys, go for my friend. Literally 100+ guys in their 20’s and 30’s have hooked up with him.
I don’t think they would ever hook up with another guy that was dressed as a guy. They love being with him because they can hold onto their masculinity while still exposing some of their innermost desires.
My friend makes a very pretty girl. I could never do it, but the look has served him very well from a standpoint of hooking up.
I have a particularly unhealthy fascination with ‘straight’ men. I use quotes because any guy who will suck a dick, or let another guy suck his, is not, in the strict sense of the term, “straight”. Gays like me find some arousal in the ‘taboo’ of it, i suppose. I say “unhealthy” because if you want love and acceptance and a long term relationship, you will not find that with a partner who, for whatever reasons, identifies as “straight”. Because he will not be comfortable with intimacy (snuggling, caressing, the physical bonding that occurs outside the sex act), and he is certainly never going to introduce you to his family! at least not in that stage of his life!
Might have something to do with the fact that some straight men who are interested in sex with other men might not be as jaded as out gay men? i dunno…
The answer seems pretty simple to me: straight guys sleep with men because they’re not straight.
Bingo.
THANK YOU. End of story.
Thank you so much for the only realistic answer.
Well said. See my answer to Kyle.
I for one am attracted to straight “acting” guys. Guys who are masculine and such. I’m not the most manly guy out there, but I am not what you’d call “obviously gay” even though I am out. I enjoy masculine activities, such as working on cars. My voice and mannerisms are more masculine than feminine.
I am attracted to the masculinity. I want to bring him his plate of food and his beer, and suck his dick while he eats it LOL! Its what makes me gay. I love men, especially when they act like men.
No offence intended to anyone else, to each his own.
I’ve been seeing a married man for five years. He self identifys as straight. We only have oral sex, which by the way is fine with me, it’s what I like. But he says that he has sex with me because men are better at pleasing other men. Women don’t want to give oral as much. And his dick doesn’t know what gender the mouth is attached to. All good reasons for me. 🙂
Another possible reason, if he’s a friend, is he knows a guy will know what feels good to another guy, so he’s more likely to be satisfied. My joke to any straight or bi guy was, I won’t expect flowers or candy, nor expect him to be perfect since this is purely recreation. No pressure and that guy cameraderie, then, would be a reason I have noted. It almost can be treated like an inside secret, not awkward or anything afterward. Just a thought.
and if he is a straight married guy he won’t get you prego lol
Guy are just sexual pigs . The dude gets drunk and the chucks brush him off. Then finds a dude sneaking looks at him in the bar or at the urinal. He thinks to himself that he really needs to nut, so why not try it for “once”. Then it gets to “that butt looks hot, so, since I KNOW he wants it”… Sometimes the difference between a straight guy and a straight trick is a few beers and a couple Fireballs.
LATINLUST where are you at? i’m buying shots of FIREBALL at the saddle tonight
I consider myself 99% str8. When I do get that urge to seek out or fantasize about a male companion I have met or I see on A4A, the 1% kicks in big time. I can’t rest until my urges have been satisfied either by stroking one out or hooking up with a willing male partner from this site. Being only into receiving oral in past I now fantasize of sucking my 1st cock. The 1% now seems to overwhelm my body when I see a big cock on a local guy who wants to choke on my above average dick. Currently I just move on and stroke one out knowing that if we meet the 1% will turn into the 99% and will consider myself 1% str8 from now on.
I am 50 something years old and I didn’t mess with guys until I was about 35. I dated females exclusively and fell in love with a lady and we had 3 kids from our marriage. We brought our home with the white picket fence. Basketball court and dog in the back yard. . I looked at guys but never tried anything. My first experience was a blow job in a book store booth. He sucked my dick like no other woman did. He didn’t nibble on it, he sucked it all. He licked my nutts and all. I think straight guys mess with gay guys is because of the good sex. Men know what men like and have the stamina to handle back to back to back sessions. Gay men suck dick and eat ass with a passion. They moan and groan letting you know they enjoying the dick. Secondly I think its the brotherhood thing especially when you’re having sex with a good friend.
I love ya, Dave, but I think your post is based on a false premise. By definition, straight men have sex exclusively with women. The moment a guy engages in sexual activity with another guy, he is no longer straight; he is at the very least bisexual.
Studies of sexuality have determined that if white is gay and black is straight, the vast majority of us are shades of gray – meaning nearly everyone possesses some degree of bisexuality. Few of us are 100% straight or 100% gay.
The guys you listed have other issues going on. 1. They have not yet embraced their sexual identity. 2. They act out to repress doubts about their masculinity. 3. They fear social/family pressure. 4. They’re in denial. 5. They pretend to be straight as it appeals to gay fantasies and increases their earnings in the porn business.
No doubt, there are many other psychological and emotional reasons why gay and bisexual men claim to be straight.
Headsupguy nailed it: ANY sex with the same gender NEGATES the ability to be straight!
If I change my spark plugs, I’m still not a mechanic. If I take out a splinter, I’m sure not a surgeon. If a guy has sex with another guy, he’s just a guy who had sex with a guy. He can define himself since it’s his life. Or any gay guy who umpregnated a lesbian friend is not gay. I guess I just don’t condone the gaydream that every straight guy is waiting to be turned. It’s like an admission that Jerry Falwell conversion therapy is valid, after all. See the issue? Just my opinion, though.
Changing your sparkplug (or knowing they’re the problem) doesn’t make you a mechanic….but you aren’t completely oblivious to a car’s workings. & who said anything about “bagging a str8 guy like a trophy”?
Let me give you an example to explain how I see it: suppose you have a gallon of white paint. By adding just a microscopic drop of black paint to it, it can no longer be considered pure white.
Is it possible that some men enjoy the physical aspects of sex with another man, but emotionally only partner/love a woman? I don’t think sex and emotional bond drive people to only one gender.
For me, the older I get its more about compatibility. I want someone I can relate to, talk with, share special times with etc. it just so happens that men meet my needs better than a woman ever has. And the sex is wonderful!
That is me. If I were in my 20’s right now in 2017 I would be looking for Mr Right. Instead I have been with my wife 30 years and it was 20 years ago that I really felt a sexual preference for men. However in men I prefer smooth/shaved slim versatile bottoms like myself. And if they are overtly gay or fem in their mannerisms I REALLY am hot for them. To each his own.
I’ve found, through experience, not to label guys or their behavior. Men will do what they want with whom they want, and defining this as gay or straight or bi can be very limiting. Why do you think AIDS campaigns are directed at “men who have sex with men”?
While I tend to agree with the former, many HIV campaigns (A new AIDS case has not been found in a long time due to all the advances in medicine))deal with all different types of people from all different walks of life. The focus is on men more and why men contract it more, is because we are all horn balls. Labels are simply just that..a label. Gay, straight, Non-binary… It’s all just shit to divide is even more. Just do what makes you happy and call it a day.
Shouldn’t the title be “Why Straight Guys FUCK With Men”. I don’t think there is any sleeping involved, it’s all about the “fuck and go”. Sleeping is a nicer way to describe it, but we need to put that word to rest.
Sleeping? That’s a curious word for this subject
It’s all about CUMMING! Gay guys like to suck and love the cum. Simple
I’m married to a woman for over twenty years. I love her and I won’t ever leave. I like having sex with men, though. Sex has waned over the years at home, and sex with men is just more passionate. We don’t need romance, we don’t need to be friends. The buddies I meet for sex are just that…sex. We have a hot lunch hour of making out, sucking and fucking. Then we go back to work. It’s passionate, loud, uninhibited, fun. You can label me whatever you want. I call myself horny…
Married here to a woman for 25 yrs and I feel the same way bro. Love her and the kids and would never leave her but holy shit there is something so satisfying about getting it on with another dude. With another married dude is ever HOTTER
Where do you live? Haha…
same here married for 30 years love the wife but she does not want or like sex works for me because having sex with another guy is so satisfying and just fun and hot
To “Kyle”, “Rich”, and “Brian”, you are all “BISEXUAL” men. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with this “label”. The problem is when “bisexual” men refuse to accept it and call themselves “straight” or “heterosexual” men who, by definition, are sexually interested in women ONLY while, on the other hand, “gay” or “homosexual” men are sexually interested in men ONLY.
Think of it as a straight line that you draw on the page or on the blackboard with “gay” or “homosexual” men on the left, “bisexual” men in the middle, and “straight” or “heterosexual” men on the right. The closer the “bisexual” men are to the left, the more interested they are in men rather than women, and the closer they are to the right, the more interested they are in women rather than men. Those in the middle of the line would be, in principle, equally interested in men and women. Of course, these interest proportions can change with age while the person still remains bisexual. This description applies to women too (lesbian/homosexual, bisexual, straight/heterosexual).
All three of you said that you are interested in sex ONLY with men. Well, that is precisely why many “gay” or “homosexual” men do not want to deal sexually with “bisexual” men, especially those who are married to women, because these “gay” or “homosexual” men do NOT see any prospects for relationships and/or genuine friendships with these “bisexual” men. I truly think that “bisexual” men who are married to women should hook-up with other “bisexual” men who are also married to women since they are in the same boat. It would make things simpler for all of them.
Enjoy yourselves gentlemen!
i do agree with you totally i consider my self bi to the left and i do trying finding other bi men like my self sometimes that is hard to find i do find my self finding more gay males that love married bi males more then bi males with the same interests
Dave, your title is one of those cliche sensationalized eye catchers that then inevitably fails to follow through with anything worth reading. Sensationalism is defined as “reporting about generally insignificant matters and events that do not influence overall society and biased presentations of newsworthy topics in a trivial or tabloid manner contrary to the standards of professional journalism” (Stephen Mitchell, 2007, A History of News)
As the title falsly suggests, the article will be talking about “Straight” men having sex with men, and then your first example simply states, “theyre just not out of the closet”. Hence they are not straight but just in the closet. You then quote Gael Garcia Bernal who claims that being “macho” means to top other men. This doesn’t mention anything about sexual titles, it just mentions how masculinity will somehow suggest sexual roles. Bernal’s comment pressuposes that if you are a bottom you must be “unmacho” and therefore worth nothing more than a hole to stick your penis into. All in all your article seems to suggest nothing about straight men, but moreso talks about how some societies aren’t accepting of homosexuality and therefore men are likely to hide in the closet due to terror of being socially shunned. God forbid we should be honest about our sexuality and not feel embarrassed if (as is my case) a “macho” bearish construction worker loves bottoming for his smaller framed smooth skinned asian husband.
With regards to the pay for being gay, if he’s a prostitute and can maintain an erection for a man long enough to perform sexually, he’s not straight. If he is doing porn, posed as a “straight” man, he’s not actually engaging in sexual contact with a man and therefore doesn’t belong in this article.
I would hope that this blog would use it’s influence to discuss topics that can influence our societybfor the better and spread acceptance for homosexuality throughout the world. I don’t see that happening with articles that use cliche sensationalized titles and in the body of the article spreads messages of deprecatipn towards certain groups of people.
The straight guy I suck off on weekly told me it’s because unlike his girl I don’t stop till he nuts, which sometimes take awhile but all good with me.
It’s silly to make assumptions. There are many reasons. Look at women: they are more comfortable with women, and once their hormones stop driving them to have babies, they are more likely to become lesbian. Many married men do the same thing. Or they finally find they want something different, or they won’t cheat on their wife, but with a guy, it’s not cheating. Or, or, or, 500 shades of everything. Most of all, they are more comfortable with the idea now, and women have pushed them to it. Men maintain their sex drive longer, so it all works out.
You missed the big one: it’s easier. There’s really no such thing as casual sex with a woman. You either have to spend ages seducing her or you spend ages trying to get rid of her after the deed is done. Guys are horny and don’t have a problem with a fuck and go. And they give way better head.
If so called straight dick rises for another man, then straight dick is really bi (or gay), if straight dick doesn’t rise for another man, then he really is straight.
I love my bi men.
Well said!
I’ve blown several straight guys. I’ve no reason to doubt they’re straight, but in a dark room, when they’ve got a full load to release then it’s a case of “a mouth is a mouth”. It’s surprising how many will go for it if no one ever finds out, especially horned up young guys who want to get off 24/7.
At most I’ll get a hand on the back of my head, but there’s no touching apart from that. Also no chit chat after & most have wanted to watch straight porn while getting sucked. None of them look at where there cock is. Yeah, they’re the straight ones.
I went to Cuba and spoke to a straight musician on the boardwalk.. I offered him a deal if he wanted to go a 16 day vacation with me.. He agreed because he would go get to see his family and not work.. I wanted nothing from him,except for him to negotiate everything for us.
When we were alone we talked about me been gay and him straight.. He would only have sex with women ( especially prostitutes) because they are straight to sex.. it took me 7 days to get him to be comfortable about me sucking him off.. I explained that he didn’t have to pay me, and it would discrete be drama free.. The lights turned off and his dick was hard as hell.. From that day i sucked him off every night and even gave him ass 3 times.. I think men will have sex to bust a nut..then go back to their reg life..:)
I think a big part of it deals with straight guys not getting their needs met with the wife/gf. Especially when it comes to oral I feel this is the case. Although most straight guys will never say it, I think in their minds they KNOW that guys will be able to satisfy them in ways a women can’t understand or perform on them. Guys also like variety and want something new, thrilling, exciting, and seek it out.
For me the attraction is that this is something they don’t normally do and especially not with another guy. The fact they let their guard/walls down and are willing to be intimate with a man(me) was and is a big turn on. A lot of my experiences with “straight” married guys has been that they are more passionate and expressive in bed and the sex was amazing.
Currently I have one guy that is straight and we meet up for the sole purpose of me orally pleasuring him. He simply loves the way I suck his cock and that I’ll rim him, nothing more. I get my needs met and so does he. We get along great like two buds, nothing awkward or uncomfortable even after we are finished before I head out.
but none of those are straight they are bi like me i am not straight i am bi at least i love sex with men and women i just love sex with men a little more which makes me bi leaning more to the left
When I was a teenager, I had sex with 7 of my friends. None of hem knew about the others although we were all good friends. They all eventually got married and have great families with kids. Not me, I knew who I was from puberty, I like men! In later life, I’ve hooked up with several married men who just love what I can give them that their wives can’t. I don’t think they think of themselves as homosexual, just curious. Also, they don’t think they’re cheating on their wives because another woman isn’t involved.the Kinsey scale tells us that between 1 to 7 most men are somewhere in the middle but very few are ones or sevens. If men were completely honest, I think you’d find that the vast majority have had sex with another man at least once.
I will throw in my two cents and since I am so far down, I’m sure no one will even read this, but I always thought that being gay or lesbian was associated with the emotional desire to be with that particular sex. I am a man that gets his occasional blowjob from the guy in the video store booth. I don’t know who he is, what he does or what he believes in. The only thing that matters is that I am horny and this is much faster than going to a bar, buying drinks and possibly striking out. There is a 100% chance of getting off in one of these locations, I don’t and have to say hello to this person and I don’t even have to see him sometimes. I still consider myself straight because I have a desire to be intimate with a woman, and envision a future with set sex. I feel no shame in what I do but I won’t be screaming from the mountain tops for personal privacy and I believe that if men knew how easy it is to drop a load with another man then they would do it as well.
I agree. Often it is married men with sexless marriages. It is easier to be with a guy and they know what to do. Many straight married men like kissing and the whole works, others not. The reality is a lot of “straight” men do other men. Let’s all just enjoy it. It has gone on for centuries.
but they are not straight they are bi
Pretty cut and dry if a guy is straight but gets sexual with his gender be it giving or receiving he is at least bi curious and the least. Most of the guys I have been hooking up with are married but tell me men give better head and some say the wife don’t do anal.
People like myself although very few guys I am attracted to the one thing I know is I love pleasing a man and truly enjoy having sex with them and to me it is much better then sex with women.
when you have a guy that knows what a guy like and is eager to preform for him of course the sex is going to be better.
I think most every guy has a bi side to him, whether they admit it or not. Society says, either your straight or gay. Religion, morals, society, laws, and how we are taught by our parents basically try to set us up to be straight. But for those of us like me, I admit, I am bi, lately learning more toward the gay side. Yes, I love women very much, and not just for sex, and also love men for who they are and not just for sex. I have always been able to get a hard on sometimes just thinking about guys or women. Us guys know how to please each other sexually. We just get it up and do it. Now women on the other hand, well, in order to get a woman to have sex with you, you have to coddle her, give her flowers, take her out to expensive dinners and drinks, buy her jewelry, have lot of meaningless talk, etc, long before she will just give in to have plain old sexual fun. Men on the other hand enjoy the pleasures of sex without all that hoop la. Us guys know what turns each other on, what we like are are into. Sex, love, and romance are separate things. Women seem to think all these must exist first before the sexual thing kicks in.
People get so caught up on the labels that it’s confusing and a turn-off to some. Just because someone has a sexual encounter with their same sex doesn’t have to make them “gay” any more than a person eating broccoli makes them a vegetarian. Also, despite popular belief, being gay and being effeminate are two totally different things. Not all gays are fem, just like not all fems are gay. So, it’s these stigmas and unnecessary labels that scare many guys and make them run away. They think they don’t want to try sex with another guy because then that would make them “gay,” which would then place them in a community of fems and snap-queens, which they might not want to identify with. If people got rid of the labels and if the gay “image” wasn’t almost always stereotypically fem, I think everybody would just be happy to do whatever they want without fear of it having to mean something more than maybe it is.
Hey guys, read post written by Chris, he has a point….. I, myself have been with various men all at different stages of Kinsey scale measurements….. I am gay, actually 100% gay, never have had sexual contact with a female & the main reason that I am gay is due to the fact I am emotionally spiritually physically mentally & my entire being in every way is attracted to men…. Can I be, & have I been sexually stimulated by a female?….. yes….. Have I ever acted upon that stimulation?….. no….. why?….. because the desire was not there, the urge was not there, the necessity was not there…. I am gay for a reason.
Can a st8 guy have sex with a man & still be considered st8?….. yes…..
The problem is confusing sex with sexuality…..
I had/have sex with st8 guys, sometimes only once & sometimes more then once & it becomes a regular occurrence. Are those st8 guys that I have sex with still st8?….. yes they are & the reason being is it is just sex, a motion, a desire, a release, an urge & nothing more at the end of the day he is still emotionally spiritually physically & mentally attracted to female, to him I am nothing more then an “ends to a means” he does not “feel” the emotional attachment to me that he does for a female. This is not to say it is a cold void encounter, nothing could be more the opposite.
The st8 male gets his sexual appetite fulfilled be it, kissing, sucking, fucking, fisting, whatever he may desire/want….. having his cock sucked until completion, him sucking mine, his ass fucked, him fucking my ass, his ass taking a fist, my ass taking his fist & any combination above….. after-all it is just sex…..
That is how the st8 guys that I have sex with view our encounter….. they are getting something from me that they cannot get from the gf/wife/partner…. sex & only sex…..
Straight guys sleep with men because they can..why ? because we gay fellows are willing and able to give them what they want.. a blow job because the wife doesn’t give them head anymore and a nice tight hole for those who wanna fuck..go to a bath house around 5.00pm…married men “working late” sizing up who they want to suck their dick..then quick shower to rinse off the spunk smell and head on home for dinner with the family.. the male species is predominantly more aggressive and is ALWAYS looking for something…same reasoning applies with heterosexual men who cheat on their wives with another woman…if the opportunity presents itself and they think they can get away with it…PANTS DOWN…there are sites which I’m sure some of you may have visited, where guys are on cam jacking their cocks off with their wedding bands on…really ?…men are whores..most of them attention whores..looking to boost their ego
For me it was a thing of curiosity. I grew up being told what “men” do being hard and disconnected from feelings and shit. I met a older gay guy at work and he pretty much knocked everything I thought I knew on its ear. We never hooked up but he taught me not to be ashamed of having feelings for people of the same sex. I’m still “closeted” I guess you could say. I’m engaged and I told my wife to be about my feelings and urges and she completely understands and is still by my side. But at the end of the day it’s something about feminine men that’s a turn on for Me.
For me it all started with butt play in my 18-21 years. I would sneak a hearty carrot or zucchini into my room and take em up my ass. It was such a thrill yet nothing about it made me feel gay. I never fantasized about men when I masturbated. It was just a fetish at the time. Then I discovered Craigslist when I was about 30. The easy access to sex was too much pass up. All this time I’d been using dildos to get off and still I’d never been with a guy or felt that desire. I have never been attracted to men physically, only in what they can offer me in terms of pleasure. And here was CL, this place where you could send out a message and a picture and potentially be meeting someone. It was so amazing at the time. Now CL is full of bots and fakes, but back then you could actually meet dudes. And so I finally did one night. It was in a sleazy motel with mirrors on the ceiling. I was so nervous but determined to do it. The guy opened the door in his underwear. I walked in and made sure no one else was in the room. Then I began sucking his fat cock. It barely fit in my mouth. I’d never practiced on anything so wide! I then jumped on the bed naked and got into doggy style. But that fat dick couldn’t get hard enough to fuck me. I was so ready too. It was a dissapointment. But at least I’d finally sucked my first real dick.
After that, I tried again. Not much better though. This guy came the second he pumped me once. Bummer. Then I met a guy with a huge dick. But he just jammed the thing in there. It hurt. Not a good experience. I was beginning to think I’d never find a fuck buddy. Then one afternoon I met a dude with an average nice size cock and he fucked me balls deep so good. I couldn’t believe how good it felt to have his whole dick inside me. We fucked several other times then I lost contact with him.
Since then I’ve still run into bad experiences, but now I know what I want and what I don’t. I’m not picky about looks because like I said, for me it’s not about physical attraction. I am only attracted to women in that way. Intimacy and relationships only feel right with women. That’s the truth. But if taking some good dick makes me gay, then maybe I’m gay. But I’m not. I’m most likely bi in that my mouth starts to water if he’s got a beautiful cock way.
I don’t feel conflicted about what I do. I enjoy both men and women, just in different ways. Find me on A4A if you’re in CA near Redlands. 😀
I’m a married man but I realized that I was just as content to kiss and cuddle as to fuck and suck – at that point I knew I was gay
Yep
The straight-gay sexuality issue has changed in recent years. Although so much has improved for our community, one can see that many gay men are showing some very unhealthy patterns. Although stigma towards a subculture is not healthy for the members of the culture, many can wear that stigma like a protective veil. When it is lifted, they need to put it on again to hide.
Two phenomena can be observed–gay men treating straight men as supermen, and themselves as unworthy.
This can be seen in public classifieds such as Craigslist. A few years ago, there would be an occasional ad where someone was looking for a straight/bi man. Sometimes it’s now upward of 90%. Straight men are almost fetishized. They are revered as sexual gods while their own community becomes abhorrent to them. (A little self-hatred?) And to round out the game, gay men pretend to be straight to become more attractive to their own.
In addition to turning straight men into sexual objects of the highest worth, the term “straight-acting” indicates the need to run from one’s self-identity.
1) Just what is “straight-acting”? It must mean there is something known as “gay acting”? They’ve bought into stereotyping themselves. Does it mean one has to buy a pickup truck and spit on the sidewalk? Do all gay men prance and wear makeup? The terms are pretty monolithic.
2) Why would someone need or want to “act” a certain way? Are they embarrassed about themselves? Desire to be straight? The world has said we can be and act gay….but now we are saying it’s important to “act” non-gay.
3) Why would someone want to get involved with someone who needs to “act” in a way not natural to them? OK, role play can be fun, but they’re looking for a person who lives with a mask on.
Perhaps in another generation or two, we can begin to remove the self-hatred created from being oppressed. In the meantime, let’s stop oppressing ourselves.
I love fucking straight young guys..it’s like I’m taking advantage of them because they don’t want anyone to find out. I particularly like calling them sluts while I fuck them.
I have been seeing a guy for 14 years. During that time it was nothing but oral. He is extremely sexual. I think in the back of his mind he was curious but never proceeded. Now 14 years later we are having anal and let me tell you it is GREAT. He loves women and is married to one as am I. The sex is so great I’ve fallen in love. He says He does too but don’t like to hear it all the time.
I, personally, refuse to have sex with hetero-identified men. I won’t participate in any of the stereotypes involved in such activities.
I even draw a (dotted, admittedly) line at ‘straight-acting’ gay men. to me it’s like describing yourself as hot. if you have to tell people, you’re not.
I really don’t care its harmless fun for both gay and “whatever” really. I don’t feel the need to pin a guy down for an appropriate label, I’ve always had all kinds of sex with guy that are bi or, the have “tendencies”, its all good to me, just so I’m not involved w/someone who is cheating on a girlfriend or worse; wife. These were always the conditions set forth.
Otherwise, some like to have the kind of sex women typically don’t like, then there’s the other whole host of reasons. I’ve met guys that have a fetish for Black men, but prefer hetero-sex, with white women, there all sorts of scenarios…
Straight guys may just not identify with gay culture…I am middle-aged happily married for 30 years to a lovely wife with two grown children…I have always enjoyed anal sex. Been taking cock since introduced to it by a 16 year old neighbor when I was 12 years old…Flat out it’s the sex…These days it’s just getting a cheap motel room, put an ad up for anon ass up lights off action on CL, or Asspig, or BBRT. I can get a 1/2 dozen loads in a couple of hours and get home for dinner. I get more nut in my gut in a month than most gay guys get in a lifetime. Usually it’s either black or Latino guys and lately all BB. None of these guys are gay, most are married or have girlfriends…It’s just sport fucking.
Lately I have started avoiding hooking up with gay guys, too many lonely hearts, and limp weak hard-ons. Is it Tina or have they become jaded by too many hook-up s? The bitterness and superficial conversation of a middle-aged gay man doesn’t match the fascinating stories a young uncut thick fat cocked Mexican laborer with a wife and a couple of toddlers at home or a handsome BBC career naval officer. Variety is the spice of life!
Sport fucking, ha, that’s something as a young man, you would do. I like your point though, these guy today, are like hard-ass fucking street-walkers, bitter, cold, as you said, jaded; too many games, lies and down-right betrayals = trips to the clinic….
Ain’t got nothin’ to do with love, sex, is the addiction that kills many things, before you finally stop breathing…
This, is why, I ssooo rarely play, I cross the road before I get there…
I struggled with that for a while. In College I felt more emotionally attached to woman then I did men. I’m a top and I’m not attracted to penis at all. I loved the physical part of fucking dudes and getting my cock sucked by a dude because guys know what a guy want, but still loved to pleasure and touch a woman and and worship a woman’s body. I am openly bi sexual and still have these same feelings. At the end of the day i think its just a top and bottom thing. I never identified as gay because I’m not attracted to cock. But I enjoy fucking guys that always made me feel weird and out of the loop. Anybody else deal with this?
I think its really a TOP AND BOTTOM thing. I can’t put in the words I want to but I’m seeing some of the same points I said along this thread. Sex with men is just awesome but women are amazing and caring. Not saying guys aren’t but when I’m with a guy I want a guy not a fem. That’s why why we have men and women. The universe gave us options. I’ve been in a relationship with a bf and a gf and I’ve loved them both equally. But there was more of an emotional attachment to my GF where as my BF and I were more like buddy’s still love but it was more sexual and fun. Can anybody relate or am I just rambling? Would love to continue this disscussion. Its something I’ve been battling for a while
Straight men understand that procreation is a useful tactic. If men fucked just men-there’d be no babies. So, I feel like some straight men live a temporary fantasy-and go right back to the boring ole ‘ routine. End of day men on men is a no-holds bar, 1-1 (or 3)-where in most cases a gay guy so happy for cock he’ll shut up. The straight top doesn’t care about you-just his nut so no words spoken, there. Some,sure, have that “Brokeback Mountain” bromance behind it-but I’m most cases I just feel as if NSA sex is the goal for most claiming to be straight-in & out-no prenatal appts, ceremonies, child support arrangements, nor a “chill” after Netflix sex.
Labels are for small minds.
The constant shrill squealing that any contact with another dick means they’re not straight is tiresome and nothing but an advertisement of their own inner struggle with self acceptance.
How can someone’s world be so small and experience be so limited that that’s they’re only conclusion there able to draw. So ugly.
Grrrr. Their/they’re.
Come on it’s because men always want what they can’t have, and it’s like getting approval from the straight community! After all that’s what most gay people want.
I started when I was young, my penis was and is small and I could not satisfy any girls. So I went the other way and I would satisfy guys. Now I love the feel of a nice big cock inside me.
For some weird reason I feel a weed to post a follow up comment…I am married to a woman but am always cautious if I okay with a single gay man. I’ve never had any sort of fatal attraction thing (I’m not that interesting if a guy), but rather I feel it’s an unfair dynamic to the gay single guy. If I’m with another married man or a partnered gay man, we both know what we are there for…sex. If a guy is single I always feel like he deserves more than to just be someone’s lunch hour fun. Now…I’ve had gay single men as partners…but I always make sure he isn’t feel taking advantage of…because I would never want to be the one to take advantage of someone.
If you sleep with men and are a man, then you are not straight. I am gay and I do not sleep with women no matter what. There is no sexual desire what so ever. And yes, they try.
Two different head spaces, man, women are about home, hearth, kids, men are always about fun, frolic, adventure of the hunt-whatever it may be. Just remember, as humans, we’re still evolving right along with all other life-forms, ain’t sure for how much long considering, but that’s another conversation. The Ancient (Greek) civilizations, the men went away in packs like wolves or something, hunting, training for wars; they coined a phrase I once heard, “men are for loving, women are for babies.” It’s Religion, that fucked-up everything, people are way more confused than ever before, about a great many things, again, another conversation, though. Maybe individually, people just need to learn from what they’re doing, by the results of what they’ve done, be still, take note and get to know their selves, from the inside and just stop reacting as though they have no control over their bodies, you think? Then they tell everyone else applying labels, to go fuck themselves ’cause they know who they are to themselves.
Well, the one I have seen the most of personally – drugs. Specifically : crystal meth. It increases libido, lowers inhibition, and allows them to explore without guilt.
I am straight, but love taking anal from a sexually aggressive, and dominating man. I just really love the actual sensation of being penetrated, and a real penis does do it best. I also love being emasculated and humiliated sexually, by the guy who enjoys treating me like a sexual object.
Oh, you’ve made a very strong point there, we’ve all heard the “I was drunk,” excuse.
If a guy who says he is straight but too eager to have gay sex with you he is gay or bisexual. If he is homophobic, he is usually gay or bisexual. People who have phobias to spiders and snakes tend to be afraid because they can bite and poison you. Nobody is going to force themselves on a guy unless your in jail or prison or a helpless child. So it’s ridiculous for a straight guy to be homophobic outside the real world. Phobia is fear and fearing gay guys is after your dick when they might not be just tells gay guys more about them then it does them. After all gay guys don’t have straightaphobia of turning straight for being around a straight guy or girl because they are secure in they’re own sexuality so why feel insecurely if you’re a straight guy around gays?
I am a straight guy who really enjoys getting anal, sexual emasculation and humiliation play, being physically and sexually dominated, being sexually demeaned, and i love being sexually objectified. I dont know why, but when a guy pulls out his large erect penis and waves it at me, and asks if i wanna take it, and how he is gonna turn me into his bitch, i get in this weird horny state. I usually reply back something like, ‘would like to see you make me take it’, which works 99% of the time to get them to come over and grab my ass, forcefully bend me over, grab the back of my head, and shove their penis in my mouth and fuck my face then hold my back down on what i was shoved onto, and get my pants pulled down to mid thigh, feet kicked apart, and get a good anal pounding, and experience the most intense and aexually gratifying orgasms i ever had. I dont like kissing guys, and if a guy touches my penis i get turned off. My penis gets really flacid and tiny when i am in a submissive mood and pretty much i enjoy the feeling of a nice large real penis over toys, the way a man thrusts his penis into my ass, hard fast and deep, the way a man dominating me holds me down, as he makes fun of my dick being super tiny, calls me his bitch, makes fun of my butt looking like a nice bitches bubble butt as he grabs, gropes and smacks it, and how i have feminine shaped legs, and how i should have been born with a pussy, not my tiny dick, since then i would have more holes for more dicks. I also love when i get told how i sound like a bitch when i moan in pleasure, and when asked if like their dick, etc. I enjoy degrading sexual actions, like facials, and in general being covered in cum.
My first roommate ever took me and made me his bitch like that, for three weeks, when he wanted my ass, he took my ass, and i loved it. After three weeks, i would initiate just as often, because he would grab and grope my ass, smack my ass with his cock every chance he got, and the few times he jerked off since then, he would cum on my face righr after waking me up telling me to open my mouth, but he still would get most of my face plastered, and smear it all over my face with his cock, as he took photos, and recorded some video. I enjoy the sensation of a real penis inside me, especially bare and getting loads of jizz often. I love sucking a penis that came inside me clean, because i love the taste of cum, and doing nasty raunchy slutty things, but only when a man doesnt ask, he just shoves it in my mouth. I love being manhandled and being made to feel like i am powerless and weak, and less manly, especially when i enjoy the otherstuff. When the man controls everything , angle, speed, position, where he is going to shoot his cum, and i enjoy it in or on, pref around my butt or face.
While i have spent several years being a mans ‘bitch’ and not dating or pursuing women (women who did not have a large penis for a few kinky 3 ways) and how awesome it was to enjoy intense, gratifying, multiple orgasms while being able to really pleasure a guy, who there was 0 attraction to, never kissing him, him never touching my penis, but still 3 or more times a day we had sex wxcept on weekeds which we would marathon sex, going several loads of cum in my ass without him ever pulling his penis out of my ass, and when he did, lots of cum from over 14 hrs and 10 loads. Being fucked unexptectedly in several restrooms off installation, in a movie theater, and even being taken by him to a gay bar and club private party, whoch basically was for gay BDSM type stuff. Was fun having sex in a bar and they encouraged masturbation. Loved seeing hard dicks being stroked staring at my naked ass bend over being fuckwd good and hard by my roomie. Loved watching guys jerking off to my ass and howany came when they saw the huge cum loads drip from my gaping hole, down and off my butt cheek, and getting a facial after blowing him at the bar, and all the times my ass was grabbed, groped, and how guys loved running their wrections oto my hand, and beong called a crazy wild filthy slut. Alsoanu laughed when they realized that when i am in total submissive bitch mode, my penis .al.ost disappears it gets so small, i love it.
I think a lot of men have sex with men. I think a lot of men just don’t identify with being bi or gay even if they have bf’s or sex on the side. I think a lot are sexless marriages or they are into being with men b/c it’s just the sex (you know, how a large majority of gay men are, and if you are not and have a loving and mono relationship you are one word: lucky). But yes clearly no matter how you identify yourself, if you are “straight” and having sex with men, then you are bi. And yes, totally bi, into both men and women, people do exist. Some may not be comfortable with their sexuality yet or whatever, but I think they know if their dick gets hard for both sexes, they are not totally straight and not totally gay. The in-between exists, lucky bastards.