Love : Feminine Men And Love
Feminine gay men are beautiful, they are smart, they are bold, they are thoughtful, they are creative, they are funny, they are all of these things. The innate femininity that is in a lot of gay men is what makes us great, and better than straight men (just kidding, not really). Besides, we’ve come this far in this gay fight. Why try to pretend to be “normal” straight folks now? Yawn.
So, you’re a rather masculine gay man, and what would complement and stroke your ego more than a feeble, submissive feminine gay man, right? Wrong. Your need to be an alpha or Adonis should not be a factor in how you decide to treat a feminine man. Sometimes the “masculine man” think they already know that the feminine man will be crushed by their perceived manliness and large beard. They are just so sure that they will be ready to be their on-call maid, sexual deviant, and yes-man. On the contrary, mannerisms and clothing choices hardly signal what kind of man you are going to deal with. Feminine men come just as strong-willed and dominant as their masculine counterparts. Your best bet is to actually get to know the individual, and create a unique relationship based on who the both of you are, not by what society says you are.
More than likely, a feminine man is beyond comfortable with who he is, and the last thing he needs is someone who isn’t just as comfortable with it. Even better, he needs someone that loves and prefers it. If you can’t handle a martini or a shopping day once in a while, then you might want to back down. The feminine man has spent entirely too much of his life fighting to be exactly who he is just to hide it because his love interest isn’t as comfortable with who he is as he is.
These are six key points in how to start and maintain a healthy gay relationship with a feminine man. The central thing to remember is, as always, that people deserve love just how they are without compromise because usually that’s what makes them brilliant. If you take away the fire from the sun, you just have another moon. If you take away the water from a waterfall, you just have a ditch. If you take away brown skin from Olivia Pope, you just have Monica Lewinsky. Basically, what I’m trying to say is that it’s those small quirks and nuances that make them beautiful and brilliant, and love shouldn’t inspire someone to take that away, but enhance and celebrate it.
Have you ever dated a feminine guy?
Dave
There are a lot of overgeneralizations in this piece.
Be who you are without fear or apology, and don’t let it bother you that you’re not everyone’s cup of tea.
If you’re a gem guy, great. Rock it.
If you want fem guy, great. There are plenty of them out there.
But there’s no reason that fem guys should be promoted or extolled or worshipped any more than any other kinds of gay guys.
The fems that I have met without fail have been self-centered attention grabbers who live with a “victim” chip on their shoulder blaming everyone for not being acceptedby everyone and not receiving the respect to which they feel entitled. This blog post presents every rule that needs to be followed when interacting with a fem while delivering very little about what they would offer. It’s all about that they want. What do they offer? What do they bring to a relationship? What are the prepared to give? No blog posts will be needed once they relate to others in a two way manner.
Maybe I’ll get lucky soon and will meet some gems don’t fit the stereotypical mold presented by this blog.
Getting desperate for content? Who can we marginalize next? Make every human nuance a subject to dissect? When I did porn and conducted a live forum, I was very aware of the impression I would have on remote gays, shut ins, and the naive newbies. I recommend you stick to a sexy blog of pics and fun. Your country is very judgemental and conservative. You are in a position to do something to change that.
1versfucker : yeah I think u didn’t read the post…
I like to dress up in pretty panties and a skirt or dress with a nice wig for my lover and when he is on top kissing me while he is inside me making love the feeling is so great.
Wow. This post has me rather speechless. I cannot help but wonder the motivation behind it. And yes, I’ve dated a feminine guy.
What is masculinity anyway? Whatever it ia , it was used to make SpikeTv.
Hello I found this article very interesting reason being I am a fem guy but really don’t care about labels.I love myself and it took me a long time to get to where I am.I use to hate myself because I could not hide like other gay men.then this beautiful person came into my life and said I love you and respect you for being yourself you must be a strong person.he went on to say that you have alot of good things going for you.like you work hard at your job own place don’t do drugs and you not about that drama. and this came from a straight man cause I stay true to me first not others.
Olivia Pope is just Monica Lewinsky without the brown skin? Seriously?
If a guy is comfortable being fem, that is his choice. I make no judgment on anyone’s choices for themselves. However, if I am not attracted to fem, that is MY choice. Why must we be criticized for not desiring a feminine male??? Some of us may not want an obese man or an old man, so why should fem get a pass?? If I wanted fem, I would get a FEMale — but I don’t want a female. I am not attracted to femininity on a woman OR a man. So, dating someone who is basically a woman with a dick would just not interest me. My dick would go limp. The attraction I have for a man is that I know I am not with a woman. Seeing a male walk, talk, dress, gesture or otherwise act as if he were a female may be attractive to some, but it doesn’t have to be attractive to all!
There some gay guy. Who like fem guy.
Nothing hotter than fem bottoms. Except maybe trans girls.
I love feminine men, but I’m feminine & they love masculine men, so there you go.
Anyone upset with this post needs to shoot themselves. If you don’t get it, you’re part of the problem
Sometimes I’m feminine, sometimes masculine. Sometimes I’m hypersexed, sometimes I’m a-sexed (is that a word?). Sometimes I’m the top, sometimes the bottom, sometimes in between a top and a bottom. I just wish we’d get past characterizing someone as strictly “feminine”: let’s get beyond these labels.
I wear makeup on a daily basis, I love Top 40 music, I can’t wait to go the Beyonce concert. By all accounts one would classify me as “fem”. And I appreciate that this post discusses the idea that just because I’d rather shop for clothes than watch a football game doesn’t make me somehow less than. And to the other commenters who say this article furthers a stereotypes or marginalizes “fem” guys please re-read the whole article.
mixedfem : thank you:)
@Gays4…so what should anyone think about someone who thinks other people should commit suicide?
The guy I’m currently talking to is one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met. He wears trendy clothes, gets his hair styled instead of cut, doesn’t follow professional sports, and he loves dorky stuff. He’s not the type of guy I’d usually go for, but he’s a genuinely nice person. He’s not afraid to be himself and he appreciates everyone’s individuality. I think we should be more concerned with a persons character than a collection of superficial labels we want to brand on someone.
For Me I Am Attracted To Men (no offense) but I’m not into Women sexually that’s why I’m gay not straight. Fems are cool as friends but I could never see myself with one because the attraction thing is a definite turn off if he behaves like my sister or mother.
As long as you are not a fashionista, act like a diva and worship celebrity singers excessively, we’ll get along just fine.
There is a spectrum of feminine gay guys. There are those who are fem with a higher pitched voice and a few hand movements when they talk, and there are those who care very much about Beyonce, Gaga, fashion and all that. I don’t get a long with the latter. I wouldn’t call them fem and berate them, but then I couldn’t possibly comprehend their interests. You don’t have to be into football (I am not) but the gay guys who obsess over celebrities like Britney and Beyonce…we’re just not on the same page here.
Unfortunately – my vast experience has been the more feminine the guy is the more drama-laden he is. And a guy who slings drama is a bigger turn off than a turd popping out of a dude’s ass mid fuck (oh wait some guys are into that huh? LOL). I prefer my men manly – if I want feminine I will just get a chick and take the shortcut.
I think it is fine to show mannerisms of the fact that you are gay but at the same time we are still men and should not be overboard with comparing ourselves to a strait female and or taking on the role thereof a strait female because we are still males not females whether or not we be bottom,top or verse etc.
I enjoy having sex with a fem guy because I like how docile and subservient they are in bed. Most are natural born bottoms and they admit and embrace it!! I have to admit, when I fuck them they make me feel like a man because it reminds me of having sex with a female.
However, going out in public with a fem guy is a different story. I have to admit they embarrass me in public with their flamboyant feminine behavior and mannerisms. So I could never be in a relationship with a fem guy as much as I like to fuck them.
I have noticed some fem guys do not realize their mannerisms are feminine, they are just behaving in a way that comes natural. Fem guys are like you said, very creative, animated and fun. Love to fuck em – but couldn’t marry one. I know that is my personal hang up – but just being honest.
See my pic? Think I’m a staring acting dude? I love men and women and I love to dress up in soft sexy sheer women’s lingerie. And other dudes who do too. Under my suit is sheer nylon and lace
Hi.. my name is Tony. I’m a middle aged Mexican who happens to be gay and cannot dance. So, imagine how far that goes… oh yeah, I’m feminine, rather geeky, and have dated other feminine guys — and I find this post troubling but not upsetting. There are plenty of groups within the gay community who feel the same as the author of this blog post.
Funny thing about this is most gay guys are just that gay…there isn’t really anything masculine about being gay…we like men. We see through male bolstering because we are men so that stuff doesn’t even work. A lot of guys who claim to be “masculine” are in fact very feminine they just refuse to see it. Seeking masculinity is a feminine trait…just saying. Love who you love everyone has subtle things about them that are not exactly “masculine”. The only people who seem to care about labels are the ones who believe in them. Being closed minded keeps you from finding variety in life.
Agree with Shades.
I like men who are male. Not hyper-masculine like they have something to prove, but I’m not attracted to men who wear women’s clothing, either.
First of all, ha! This post could only have been written by a feminine man.
Let me start by saying that the idea of a masculine gay man not being comfortable with who is he is, is outright ludicrous. Not all of us feel the need to make a scene wherever we go. I, for one, am very proud to say that I am a gay man, I just don’t see the need to be so damn loud about it. My sexual orientation DOES NOT define me as a person or a human being. I am more than rainbows, top 40, white accessories, the latest trendy clothing (floral patterns, I’m looking at you). Nor do I believe that your ability to grow a beard says anything about your masculinity. Hell, I’ve know some woman who are able to grow beards. If you’re going to grow one, do so because it matches your personality, not your outfit.
I simply want a man who acts, looks, and is just plain manly. Feminine men put me off because they’re too much like, well, women. And isn’t that the whole point of us being gay, anyway?
Being feminine or masculine does not make us any better than the other. In the end, it’s all about one’s personal preference as to whom we’d choose to date. So, dear blog post author, come down off your odes atoll and have several seats. This sounds more like someone has rejected you for being feminine, and you shouldn’t fault him for it. Chuck it in the fuck it bucket, and move on.
Oh, and does it count if I dated a guy who pretended to be masculine once, only to later show his true colors?
I think besides some of the issues already mentioned, another issue that’s more like a peeve is DRAMA! It’s bad enough from a chick along with inclining to gossip. But coming from another guy it’s almost nausiating!
I’ll have to respectfully disagree with you there, Cheerful.
Just because I prefer to have sex with guys doesn’t mean I also have to take on any of the stereotypical traits of a “gay” man…just like those who have sex with women aren’t expected/required to take on the macho masculine traits.
Who I am and who I choose to have sex with are two completely different things. One can be a genuinely masculine guy and sleep with guys, just as one can be a genuinely feminine guy and sleep with women.
Trying to tie a person’s gender and their orientation together is pretty disrespectful. That’s like saying that all gay men secretly want to be women, but they “just refuse to see it.”
Hard as it may be for you to comprehend, some guys just want to be guys and happen to have a more masculine personality. Not everyone who sleeps with the same sex has a secret desire to even tiptoe into the other gender.
The complainers probably have never dated a fem or a transgender for that matter. I have only dated to two mention and LOVE IT!!!! I have NEVER dated a masculine in my life. I want someone whose fem but classy not the loud flaming type…. if you got it going on and know it that stuff is not needed. I like they way she(yeah I said she) feels in my arms, the smooth soft skin, kissy lips and can handle being treated like lady without getting mad at me using fem words to to communicate with them. It’s mainly a fem whose ready to settle down into a true relationship. I like the hugging, kissing, cuddling and foreplay which doesn’t always lead to sex because we know it’s real and aren’t rush to just fuck… fucking just leaves you empty and it’s non caring. I love being the man(I’m masculine) and her being the woman(fem). MAN YOU SURE ARE HARD TO FIND. Please don’t be a smoker, drinker or hairy.
I.just love fem men ,they are a total turn on for me,if I had to choose I would pick a fem top,I love everything about them. I love how tbey dress ,walk talk,how they fuck me,I love.small fem men, love to cuddle and snuggle with them. Give me a fem man any day over a masculine man.
Amen to that Dave! I would love to find a fem man around my area!
Armando i dont know who you are or where your from but i like what you have to say
I love Feminine men i have dated fem men that does not bother me at all. They can dress very well and help you get a better wardrobe. It’s that some Gay men and “Straight” men say that why are they fem. That instead they rather be with a Female woman that a fem guy. The stereotypes that Gay man have and others for Fems are just outrageous. But I don’t discriminate i believe that a fem man is still a man and regardless of how they act or who they are their still men. That cannot change we all have a dick and two balls unless they change their sex. But that’s what always happens with the Fem I rather be with a Fem guy than an Masculine asshole..
Really? Olivia Pope sans the brown skin? Intersectionality at its best. White gays (men) are tiring.
I’m a Gay Feminine and i like black topper . these men rearley know how to make love and i should know , i’ve had a few. my problem is i’m always looking for more….. it’s not that i dont love them , it’s because i have a very strong sexual urges , which involve black men. i love the way they make me Cum…. Very hard every time.. and it’s addictive..