Health : Owning His AIDS Diagnosis
Robert Williams (instagram : @r0bertwilliams) isn’t just someone who is living with HIV, he is a person diagnosed with AIDS and he has no qualms about it. Like thousands of others, Williams has learned that AIDS may be Stage 3 HIV, but it’s still possible to live with it.
In his new youtube video, the HIV and AIDS activist speaks openly about what it means to him to talk about AIDS without any pretense or apologies.
Watch below as Rob makes a move to break down the stigma for people living with an AIDS diagnosis.
Tyler Curry – Editor at HIVequal
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A brave and beautiful man
I don’t care. I’d date him!
A4A screenname: MetalDude
In all due respect to the person presenting this video and repeatedly stating that he has AIDS…What is the point that is supposedly being made….I guess I missed it??? He has 80 T-Cells and has been experiencing opportunistic infections. In all honesty, myself once having less than 15 T-Cells and the CDC making that a criteria for being labeled as AIDS…And at the time no antivirals were available.. (I had never developed any opportunistic infections and appeared normal) That was more than 20 years ago and now with 500 or more T-Cells and having taken some anti-virals I remain undetectable and normal???
josh: It’s technical. It’s a question of phase and T-Cell counts.
But, and forgive my ignorance, with current meds available would this only be a temporary diagnosis unless he’s either exhausted all available meds or is refusing to take meds? Being + myself, I thought I was pretty educated about the virus and disease but this…..confuses me. I was diagnosed when the school of thought said to withhold treatment until your cd4 count got 250 or below. Now it’s start right away. How, being his age(by the look of it) was he not put on meds as soon as he dropped or started upon diagnosis? Unless of course, his virus is resistant to most meds.
not like it used to be take your meds see your doc 4 times a year and hell be like Charlie sheen and have sex with everyone
My take away from this video is that (although he wasn’t as succinct as maybe he could have been) he is trying to show that having an AIDS diagnosis doesn’t mean one will be deceased the day after that diagnosis. For all intents and purposes, if I saw him on the street I wouldn’t think he was anything other than healthy. There still exists a stigma for having HIV, but most conspicuously having AIDS conjures up images of one who is near death, looks sick and emaciated and likely shows signs of immune system compromise (i.e., Kaposi sarcoma, thrush, etc…)–images from the movie “And The Band Played On” comes to mind.
By taking aim at this stigma and announcing he has AIDS, yet outwardly contradicts those preconceived notions we have about what an AIDS patient is supposed to look like, he is directly challenging us to engage in a conversation to further dispel this stigma and to show that having AIDS, doesn’t necessarily mean looking sick and near death.
Derrick, thank you at least you understand 🙂
I personally don’t care that Robert has AIDS. Not that I’m uncaring. It’s that the disease makes no difference. The problem with most militants for any cause is that they hold the cause up as a line others MUST cross.
Instead of being Robert who does (this) for a living, who has (these) dreams, has (these) aspirations, and who would be an important part of anyone’s life because of (this), he is the guy who says “I have AIDS”. And what comes across is an implication that “and you can just deal with it”).
For me personally, if I meet someone, I do not need to know that they have diabetes, Lymes disease, Parkinson’s, or any other disease or issue, including AIDS. As we get to know each other in whatever social, business, volunteer relationship we may develop, it would come out as just another piece of information about them.
Instead of making AIDS irrelevant, Robert is making it an impediment … shooting himself in the foot as militants all too often do.
Very brave of him to come out and say that. However, as an hiv+ person, I feel like he stopped short. Ok he has AIDS… is he proud of that? I don’t think he should be ashamed, but I wish he would have explained more about what that diagnosis means and what comes next. I wish he wouldn’t have made it seem like having an AIDS diagnosis is normal or healthy. Idk why he has AIDS but if he was on meds he probably wouldn’t have AIDS. And how did he let it progress to that point. If his message is “I have AIDS but I’m still hot” that’s not a good message. Also, wow he’s hot lol
When I found out I had HIV in 2013, I was already full blown with a t-cell count of 16. I was very sick and scared for my life. Fast forward to today, I am undetectable(have been undetectable since the first 3month visit after starting my 1 pill a day regiment), t-cell count over 500 and as my doctor says “normal” by medical standards. I tell all people that it is better to know your status. I also tell the HIV phobic people that I and people like me should be the least of your worries. It’s those who do not know or who do not get care who are spreading this disease.
An AIDS diagnosis today does not mean what it did 20 years ago. The threshold of diagnosis has moved with the development of better treatments. K.S (kaposis’Sarcoma)is not the scourge it once was, the outward signs of a low (naming each T cell) are not as apparent. Younger guys have lived their entire life in the shadow of HIV as a possibility of sexual activity. An AIDS diagnosis can change as health improves. Life goes on, it has become a medically managable syndrome. The new “CLOSET” of a positive diagnosis is once again haunting the “COMING OUT” about status. The bright side of all this is that GAY guys are a tough bunch of guys to fuck with, we band together and deal with it!
The blogger only talk about attractive white guys. Every person this blogger talks about is somebody who most people would consider attractive…Tell me I’m wrong. Here are three just off the top of my head…1) the high school student that came out to his parents in his yearbook, 2) the guy who needed a kidney, 3) the over the top marriage proposal. If a man is not attractive, there is no place for him in this blog.
Ondrea, you are obviously new here…. I would recommend that you read posts earlier than the past 2 weeks.
Josh: The supposed point is huge, particularly to those who have fallen below the arbitrary, ever-changing threshold. Thankfully I had a compassionate doctor who has been working in this field for 20 years who assured me this was all semantics, and therefore bullshit. (Never have semantics meant so much.)
I never was diagnosed HIV+, my initial diagnosis was AIDS. 40 T-cells and a 2 million viral load. The psychiatrist I selected to help me deal with my diagnosis thought I was there to discuss HIV, when I told her I had AIDS, she openly wept. And this was only three years ago. So the stigma is alive and well, especially outside of the LGBT community.
Long story short, you can overcome and thrive, in 2.5 years I regained 700 T-cells and no viral load. However, I will always have AIDS, and when you communicate that to health care workers not primarily concerned with treating this illness, the reaction you sometimes receive is reminiscent of 1983.
Im with Josh. When Iwas HIV positive diagnosed I had 150 n KS(Kaposi sarcoma). N waiting until a whole year for treatment After 6 years myCD4 count is almost 500. Undetectable n healthy (ks almost gone). I thought that word AIDS was obsolete in America. Who s able to live with such a status here. I really don’t get it.
Guys, by posting this blog post, I wanted to show that HIV/AIDS positive people can look awesome, they can have lovers, they can have friends, they can have good job. They are not dying and unhealthy like many people think. Robert also wanted to show that life is not over and that you can love yourself, even with the disease. It is important that newly diagnosed guys see that. It is not the end of the world, they will not die next year. They can be healthy and look hot, find a lover and be successful. On that note, have a good day.
I thought of not posting, but screw it, and by all means, hurl whatever comment at me. For the past few days I have been watching youtube videos of HIV+ people (there’s been a lot of those lately). The thing that bugs me is that these clips always end with “Owning it!” and the conversation never goes beyond that. Its like what one poster said earlier here, a subtle way of saying “Deal with it!”. If the goal was to show how good you look even though you’re positive then that was very shallow. What’s next ? I know a few HIV+ gay guys who are in their 40s and they look freaking amazing…and I’ve known them for awhile longer than the whole PREP movement and owning your HIV status on Youtube.
This is on one side, on the other side, if your purpose was to show that you are capable of having a career, having a life, a boyfriend, etc, then I find this pretty trivial. This is no different from someone who got diagnosed with cancer, osteoporosis, is deaf or in a wheelchair, an amputee, etc. At the heart of it all, all of these individuals are humans and by default they have the right to an education, a happy life, a career, a family, a pet, etc. Anyone who thought otherwise should really look up Human Rights, whether the definition by Human Rights activists, UN, etc. Maybe back when Philadelphia the movie was released that topic might have been more controversial, but not today I believe. Every single positive guy I know has a job, some are successful business owners. Some sales people at car dealerships…etc. It’s a basic human right. Robert’s clip was pointless for me if it was trying to convey that message.
So we’ve established that you’re fine and healthy and deserve all the rights that an American citizen, a Human, is entitled to. Whats next ? Back to posting shirtless pics on Instagram ? Oh I am sure he has ever right to…what are the cliched lines again ? Oh right ! “Be proud of his body! Be proud of his achievement! And if you don’t agree with it then you must a sad and fat guy”. Hey I am all for people striving to achieve successful careers and Adonis bodies…this is the dream. And you can be proud and feel happy of what you’ve accomplished when you look in the mirror in the morning. Btw, this is not a personal attack on Robert. This is just something I have been observing lately. What comes after ? Are we going to talk about the underlying issues ? I feel we always fall short on the conversation. Every couple I know is in an open relationship. Every guy I know wants a relationship but is stuck in a vicious cycle of hookups. The gay community in cities tend to be small (or big like in San Fran) that all of these lead to a hodge podge of…I don’t know what to call it. And yes, I am very aware that an HIV+ person is not automatically a slut (before you “HIV slut shaming” justice warriors come down on my neck) and that it may take just one encounter for your to contract it.
All, I am asking is, what’s next ? What are we going to do about it ?
The purpose of the video was to reduce stigma and lessen fear of AIDS- both for the word itself and for a person with an AIDS diagnosis. I posted the video to my Facebook page so that it could be viewed by not only my LGBT friends but also by people who know no other person living with HIV/AIDS. I thought it was important to post because I had feared the word AIDS and did not want to accept my diagnosis. I also did not know anyone else with an AIDS diagnosis who I could relate to and could tell me l could live a happy, healthy life.
Adam,
My CD4 count is now 400 and has been as high as 770. An AIDS diagnosis is a term which shows the progression of HIV. It basically states the disease has at some time or another progressed to a higher level of severity (the person having a CD4 count of less than 200). Once a person has an AIDS diagnosis, even if they improve, they still remain with the AIDS diagnosis.
MT,
So glad you are doing well and you seem to have a great perspective. 🙂
Shades,
Creating and posting the video has been helpful to me and has empowered me. It has helped me overcome fear and shame and is helping me live a happy, open life of my own making.