Speak Out : Shades of Gray
Some people seem to live only in black or white. They can’t accept the fact that life is lived in shades of gray/grey! Black or white mentality creates miserable humans in our midst. These are the people who break emotionally rather than bend. Often it is their way or the highway! There seems to be no compromise in their brain matter.
The same black or white mentality has ruined many relationships. Guys in this group cause emotional car wrecks more often than prevent them! The fact that puritanical judgments continue to be espoused among gays and other males suggests that “if a shoe fits—wear it! It matters not whether the shoe really fits, even if it pinches a bit or causes a blister on one of your toes—but inevitably we are all condemned for deeds of misconduct. Sin? Just a matter of degree as some might argue that some acts are “indiscretions” rather than sin.
Now for reality: Since the time of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, humans have been struggling with whether sexual acts are pure or sinful. Since the early days of Christendom to the present, sexual acts for other than procreation is sinful. Within this context, most everyone on your block is sinning day and night!
Where do you think you fit?
Counselor4U
What I read is true about black and white thinking. However in the Eastern World included the Far East concepts of shades of grey have been ingrained for over five thousand years possibly older
What an oddly-phrased post: Are you asking if we are closed-minded or if we feel shame based on Christian dogma?
IN ANCIENT TIMES,NON PRO CREATION SEX WAS DISCOURAGED BECAUSE WORLD NEED POPULATION.
IF YOU WANTED A STRONG TRIBE,YOU NEEDED TO BREED.
SAME IN MID AGES BECAUSE OF BLACK PLAGUE.
TODAY,THE BREEDERS ARE MINORITES THAT WILL SOON,IN 25 YRS BE MAJORITY,ESPICALLY MUSLIMS,LATINOS.
STRENGTH IS IN THE VOTING NUMBERS!
Warning ! I’m opening a can of worms. Sex, for other than procreation, is “sinful”, comes from the bible. As does lots of other narrow minded thinking. The bible (here comes the worms) was written by men (not God) to keep the sheep in line. So all the do’s and don’t’s and stories of fire and brimstone are purely man made constrictions. You choose to follow them or not.
What an unusual entry. Sin is a meaningless word to me, considering that I personally think that Christianity is a sad joke and a control mechanism meant for weak-minded people that can’t come up with their own ideas as to how to behave and live.
Todays modern a la carte Christians pick and choose what they believe, any religion is an all or nothing bet, you either believe the whole thing or none of it. Religion never says that you can believe what you want and ditch the rest.
Personal advice: Make your own values and morals, lose the outdated bibles and come up with your own way to live. That way we can put this nonsense meant for ancient people behind us and really move forward as a world.
Life is infinetly more interesting when you take the roads less travelled with a different mindset. Breaking out of well worn patterns and “types” have made for quite enjoyable moments of joy and clarity. No judgement on what consensual activities trips anyones triggers.
I don’t understand what this post is about. Is the OP suggesting that no one is ever completely right or wrong?
Maybe Bronze Age living conditions are not sufficient basis for contemporary religious beliefs, but that’s another topic.
I think you live your life as best you can with whatever moral or spiritual compass you have.
One of my beliefs is that infidelity is not okay. Call it indiscretion or whatever you will, it doesn’t just happen. You’re not walking naked northward down the street and some guy is cartwheeling southward down the street and falls onto your penis with his anus.
You made a choice to cheat, and rationalizing it or making excuses doesn’t make up for the fact that you are responsible for your own actions. As are we all.
What created us here on earth? I will let you know if my sins flash before my eyes when I reach the other side. To be continued……..
Really? I mean really? You cited Adam and Eve, a story that is religious mythology. The notion of sin is what was given to the common man by their leaders to scare them into compliance via fear and guilt, but it is not real. Being gay is a natural sexual orientation. What the hell kind of counselor are you? We all aren’t afraid, ashamed or secretly repentant for who we are. To each his own, right. However, it is my taste that I should seek out someone to be monogomous, build a life together and with whom to grow old. Sex is really awesome. I love it, but I am a practical man who knows what I want out of life.
Terms like gay, straight, and bi exist solely to put people in the right closets.
The basic question is why should we care about anyone else’s sexuality?
I have a friend who sleeps only with men and all his friends and family know it, but he does not label himself gay because he sees that as a political mindset.
I am married to a woman and have a few fuck buddies. My wife knows about them and I know about her women friends and yet despite this play, we are the epitome of a straight couple with a house and kids and a fairly Norman Rockwell life.
I honestly believe that if we are made in God’s image then sexual variation is a part of that image. If same sex activities are an abomination then I’ll find out when I face God.
I choose to live with out judgmental limits and I have the balls to do it.
I’m awarding a “C–” to Counselor4U for this writing assignment. It consists of a handful of disconnected assertions that are not supported by either opinion or statistical data. The writer needs to go back to his room, choose whether he wants the members to discuss absolutism, morality, driving skills, footwear, Christianity or the meaning of sex. Then he must write a coherent thesis that provokes members to agree or disagree and explain why.
Screw what society thinks.
What I do with another man is between us, and pretty fucking hot most of the time. I care not what others think.
What my partner thinks is all that matters.
I’m struggling with accepting my sexuality but I thought this was good cuz I am Christian. I love the last part of this post. Then everyone is sinning. That is truth that most people forget
You know, there are many shades of many colors. There are many ways to homage a coined phraze without actually plagerizing another writer’s work.
We’re a group of multifaceted men and womyn of well more than JUST black n’white…we’re all the colors and as such have many infinite idea’s of what’s what…”throw out the banners of yesteryear”*
*Celebrate world equality!
As a Christian monk, my advice when I talk with gays having trouble with their sexuality is this:
1. The 600+ laws in the Old Testament are pretty much the laws of ancient Israel. Like all “kings” have done, they were touted to be God inspired They aren’t. Reformed Jews grasp that….Christians don’t.
2. The Twelve Commandments (yes there are twelve), when analyzed, basically say don’t intentionally harm another human being, physically, economically or emotionally. Pretty sound advice. They are nearly impossible to break if you refrain from doing that. Other than that, live your life as you please.
3. Some latch onto the writings of Paul in the New Testament. Considering he often contradicts Christ, I wouldn’t do that….unless, of course, you want to found a new religion called Paulianity.
I’m with Matt on this one. When I’m in my box and alone I will see my maker and he will the side. Until then enjoy what life offers.
Oh, here we go with the trolls again, “I duuno what he’s TALKING about!” There was a post not long ago about bi guys, and the “bi-shaming” biphobia was on display for all to see from the likes of Einathens and his aversion to “cheating,” when it’s not “cheating” at all. Like a couple of others on this one, I’m bi and have lived BOTH lifestyles, so I know of what I speak. I see all the habitude of the now-crumbling gay ghetto to the south looking down their nose at me, and I really do NOT care a bit. I am bisexual, and that is me. It’s like juggling running chainsaws at times, and the non-acceptance by gays is absolutely the most ridiculous and haughty self-serving crap I’ve ever seen them do. It’s up there with the “HIV denial” thing of the ’80s…”Oh…that’s for those bitches in NYC or SF…not ME!”, and they’d be dying of PCP six months later. Clean up your own back yard before you start sniffing around in mine. Just like that great disco hit of 1975 by Faith, Hope & Charity, written by Van McCoy, “To each his own…that’s my philosophy. I dunno what’s right for you…and you don’t what’s right for me….” Damn, those were the days….
I’ve never felt that I was sinning because I am attracted to my own sex. Its always felt completely natural to me. Never, ever have I wanted to change. The straight world thinks that’s all we think about. We hate ourselves and want to get married and have children. Not me no way. I don’t have a gray area I’m completely clear on what I want and that’s a man.
It never fails to send a shiver down my spine when, in this day and age, grown adults debate over how to appease the god. I can’t even believe this blog posted this. Can we now talk about whether the Slither G’Dee approves of my masturbation?
Not 100% sure where Counselor4U is going. There’s too much grey for me in the black and white discussion.
Am 100% sure that in the Christian denomination I’ve been a member of for decades, sex has never been spoken of as sinful.
There is the whole “though shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife” thing, of course. That being clearly stated, it’s ok to covet the neighbor’s husband!
After reading the comments on this one, I’m now convinced that “gay society” is crumbling into a heap rotting from the inside.
blather on
Sin, first off no one sin is great than the other, so if you steal a pen you’ve sinned! And as far as populating breeders need to slow down, this world can not support all those mouths to feed!
It’s my opinion that most people who become black and white thinkers, get that way from getting burned too many times. The world is filled with people who want a “gray area” allowed to them, just so they can use you. It happens as individuals, and it happens between groups of people. Too many people given an inch, will take a mile. As a matter of fact, and more often than not in today’s culture, just that is likely to happen, when you let your guard down. To address those in the thread posting on religion and spirituality, it’s quite obvious you have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about. None of this drivel has anything to do with having a spiritual relationship. None of the parables are about perfect individuals becoming more perfect, save one..and you know it. The bottom line to being a good human being, is self responsibility, that your actions in no way, shape or form, infringe on others. That concept doesn’t matter if you’re gay, straight, or celibate. Finding that concept in practice in the gay community, is like hunting for a needle in a hay stack.