Speak Out : I Met My Husband On A4A!
Below is a letter received from an ex member of A4A, I hope by sharing it to you guys, that it will show you how A4A can change your life too and that love exists. On that note, check out Ryan’s love story below!
“Hey there A4A team,
Who says that dating in the gay world is as rare as unicorns or a successful Backstreet Boys comeback? I for one had at one stage, as well as many others. Being young and gay, tall, skinny, and blond, the idea of settling down and being with one person Is remote and almost outrageous. Finding a hookup is like shopping online; a couple of clicks here, and then he’s at my doorstep. Sure, true love seemed appealing, but just not obtainable in our world. Hookups were much more convenient. It was a random Saturday afternoon in the middle of summer, and I was doing some “shopping” on A4A to fill in the afternoon, just like I had numerous times past. This particular time, a handsome, young man by the name of Dean visiting from Cleveland had messaged me. We started a chat and within an hour, I was driving to his hotel room. We all know how that ended, but afterwards he seemed very sweet and intelligent to boot. He spent an evening with me showing him around LA and learning more about each other (like what our names were!), before he had to retire to bed to catch his early morning flight. Dean left the evening by saying that if I ever were in Cleveland, to contact him. Typically, that’s an empty promise or invite, especially given the distance. I couldn’t forget him that next morning, or the day later, or the one after that.
It sounds cliché, but Dean was perfect. Within three weeks, I was in Cleveland to meet him again and was probably the most nervous I’ve ever been. I’m flying across the country to meet a random guy from A4A whom I met briefly to a city known for the Drew Carrey Show. Will he be there at the airport as promised? Will he be just as nice as I remembered him? Will he have a creepy doll collection at his house? Luckily, the answers were yes, yes, and, no, and the more we knew each other that weekend, the more we felt attached. Over the next year, I traveled to Cleveland every second week to see Dean, and he would come once every few months to LA. We were able to also travel to my native Australia together and to Europe, and despite the 2500 mile distance between us, we became inseparable.
On my first birthday together, he proposed to me in the middle of Times Square and shortly after, he moved to LA so we could live together. We are now a happily married couple and are looking forward to a lifetime together. I find him more handsome, sweet, caring, and appealing every day. It’s easy to imagine a life before him, but it wasn’t nearly as fulfilling. I wanted to take an opportunity to thank A4A for giving us the tools to meet each other; especially in a culture where dating and especially marriage remain taboo. I don’t take my marriage for granted, and often reflect how by sheer coincidence, I met Dean and how the website brought us together. There are success and love stories out there, and thanks to A4A, ours is one of them.
Thank you so much for the awesome service!
Regards, Ryan (formerly “festiboi”)”
Isn’t it an awesome story? Brought tears to my eyes when I read it and I immediately sent it to the owner of A4A, Marc, my friend. He was also very emotional reading it and proud of his website and everybody’s work too. I know sometimes it might take time to answer a question in support or might have a glitch on the app, lot’s of porn banners on the sides, or something else, but at the end, we are very proud to offer a FULLY FREE site where guys like Ryan can find the man of their dreams! Have a good day everyone!
Dave
Congratulations, guys! There are plenty of us here on A4A who envy you, and wish you All the Best!!
I live in Texas where it is not yet legal to get married but I met my “husband” on a4a and we have been together 4 1/2 years.
James: awesome!!! Congrats on the 4.5 years!
I think A4A should have a site for gay men wanting monogamous, ltrs. I’ve seen too many people requesting nsa sex but never open to dating. I’ve seen too many “open” relationships as well. Why fight for gay marriages when so many can’t commit to the monogamy involved. For once some of these people are having me side with the republicans. Sad ….so sad
Ltr_is_hot: A4A is what u make out of it…
Awesome! But what about those who met their wife on here? Is that cause for celebration too??
Randy: There’s no wife here…only men…
Well…I can’t say I’ve met my husband on A4A yet….but I’ve met many other people’s husbands on here!!
Congrats to u guys 🙂 coz sometimes I wonder where r all the real n good guys or if they exist on adam….
Met my mate on A4A, & Have been together for 8yrs now, So you can meet someone and it goes beyond NSA & one shot Hook ups
When I tell guys I met my husband on A4A they are skeptical. I still go on and speak to the friends I have made here also. Some guys just don’t understand and believe A4A is solely to hook up. Until our culture can engage in man on man contact without the sole aim to be sex, A4A is the only venue to meet other guys like us.
I met my husband on here too. I drove an hour at 9pm on a Thursday night. The next day I was telling my friends I met “the one” and I truly did!
What a nice story.
I met my future husband here also, although we met and played at a sex party over three years ago. It wasn’t until a couple months into the relationship that both of us remembered the event. We are deeply in love right now, and I think he’s the one. After the summer, I think I will propose to him.
So I guess my point is that you’ve been where I’m going. It must have been a wonderful experience for you. It is for me.
I met my current boyfriend on here. We’ve been together 4 years. We met up for a one night stand that lasted all night. We messaged each other the next day to go on a real date. The rest is history. And yes we are still both on here. 😉
I’ve met lots of husbands on A4A. They were just married to other men & women.
Ltr_is_hot: Monogamy is not required for marriage. I don’t know where you got that idea from. Oh wait I do, from the same conservative religious zealots that don’t want you to get married in the first place.
One example out of hundreds of thousands to give as proof that love is not rare. Strangely I remain unconvinced.
Awesome James! Love to hear that! Prayers for many years to come man!
I met my husband at a crazy bath house. After that first magical night, we decided to stay together. It’s been 11 1/2 years!
I agree Ltr is hot. I don’t believe most gay men understand what a binding contract is involved in getting married. Being tied to someone you might not can stand in a year or two will cost both of you a lot of money and headache when it comes time to split the sheets. I wonder what the rasciou of gay devorce is these days.
I was fortunate enough to find my husband on here 4 yrs ago, neither one of us could be more happier
Love the story, wish you would feature more stories like this, thanks.
Are the two boys in the photo old enough to be on this site? I thought 18 or over was the requirement. Best wishes for a long, long life together.
I am happy for the both of you. May you have a long, loving, fulfilling relationship and marriage!
As for me – I have become more practical as time goes by. I now would like an arranged marriage. I am willing to cook, clean house and take care of someone in exchange for companionship, friendship and just keeping each other company until the end of our lives.
Years ago in some cultures, marriages were not based on love, they were based on arranging a match. In time, many of those arranged marriages became marriages based on love and mutual respect.
For me, that’s the way I would like to go now. As we take care of each other until death, hopefully, we would grow to love each other. A love based on respect, mutual admiration and appreciation.
I picture myself keeping house, making sure clothes are washed, house is clean, food is on the table when my husband comes home. I picture me mixing him a drink and leaving him to settle down. When he is settled, he can come and have a sumptuous dinner that I prepared while we talk about the day. Maybe we go out for a bit, maybe we take a long stroll, maybe we just watch a bit of tv together before settling down for the night.
It may not be romantic but…hopefully I will have that arrangement someday. And that would be fulfilling enough.
If they’re in a small town it may work – for a while
There is no such thing as monogamous in a
Big city. I laugh at the guys on here that brag about
they’re in a long term relationship but are on here 24/7
LOL turn the computer off and do your “partner “
i too met my partner (boyfriend, significant other, spouse, fill in the blank) on A4A! we’ve been together over two years, moved in together three months ago, and things just get better every day! THANKS!
I met my husband on manhunt and we have been married a year and together for 9.
I am soo happy for them I soo wish one day to find this also but in bama I bet it wont happen since in bama gay marriage is far from happening and since most guys here just want hookups…
Congratulations guys
I’ve been back on here since 2012 & haven’t found what I truly want yet but I hope to find the one who I’ll marry someday.great story.
Husband material on a4a?? Have we fallen into a parallel universe, because I can’t get up. Hmmm…gay men & monogamy…oil & vinegar…they don’t mix, I call BS(:
Great story! Happy for both of you and what you have together.
I also met my husband on here. 😀
What it was meant to be an one night stand, turned out to be amazing and we’re still pretty strong.
x
I guess that’s inspiration for me. I wish I could be in a real relationship but most guys are superficial and looking to one night or have a relationship or play games. Its unfortunately that many don’t want relationship. I hope one day there will be less stigma and more love in this world. Beautiful story.
I guess that’s inspiration for me. I wish I could be in a real relationship but most guys are superficial and looking to one night or have a open relationship or play games. Its unfortunately that many don’t want relationship. I hope one day there will be less stigma and more love in this world. Beautiful story.
I think there’s something wrong with people who has their picture of their penis as their main photo. I make sure i block them. First impression people.
I think they have a screw loose. No husband material there.
As a closeted bi bottom, I could be open to be a ‘wife’ and meet my future husband. I just want to be loved and that story was beautiful!
Cleveland? ugh
Really guys?
Why fight for gay marriages when so many can’t commit to the monogamy involved.
same reason straight married men come and use us.
cause where men and we want Options
I am happy for you Ryan and Dean…:)hoping to get my husband from here too.
Ltr_is_hot I too am in an open relationship , but it is open because we are honest and my partner future husband is still new to the out thing. We know who we are home with at night and we will close it when the time is right for us. So please it’s not sad. We have a very honest and committed relationship and use a4a and other places like it for fun not for husband hunting. As fur the story shared. It is rare but very sweet. Congratulations to the Dean and Ryan I can hope Ga will soon get off there ass and allow me and my man to get married. Thank you Adam for lots of fun and great service but lord can you get some more bottoms around here for me? cheers
Dlinaug.
Ps
DL isn’t down low , they are my initials just saying.
That is very awesome and inspiring! Best of luck to you both!
Where would I send my story to be published as such. I met my husband on a4a when he was featured and the “member of the week” and he was halfway around the world. Granted, we didnt initially meet TO get married, but………………we did! July 15, 2014 we got married in Groton, Connecticut USA! 😀
Justin, really? wow that’s amazing.
You can send to [email protected] adam4adam . com
My partner and I met 11 years ago on gay.com, no adam4adam back then, for a hook up. We ended up dating for 6 months, then moved in together. We’re still going strong.
I am a bisexual man of 35 years. But, until I met one particular hookup on A4A, I never thought it possible for me to even fall in love with another guy. This happened while I was in California last summer. Since the feelings weren’t mutual, I had to move on. But six weeks ago, I met another guy who has definitely caught my attention, and we’ve been exclusively dating. That’s another first for me!
Congratulations Blogger on finding true love!
I met mine on another site and we just celebrated 13 years together
Great story.
I met a guy on here 6 years ago and we dated for a year and still are very good friends to this day.
If relationships don’t work one can still have a friend after 6 years.
Best of luck to the both of you
Hey guys,
I’m the actual Ryan from the article (and yes, that’s us in the photo). The initial intention of writing to A4A was to thank them. It’s been four years since I met Dean, and shortly after that we closed our accounts. In that time, I’ve been wanting to at least give the site the appreciation they deserve for offering the site and the means to meet. It was unexpected to be placed in a blog (with permission granted to them of course)
The reaction from the story is truly touching. Reading the comments, it comes as a surprise as to how many guys have also met their partners, boyfriends, and husbands on here and other sites. That is awesome, and goes to show there are many guys online looking for something long term and committed. Sometimes it seems as though they are the silent minority. Congrats to all of you, and especially to the amazing stories that mention years and years of togetherness.
To those of you who are longing for a relationship or are on the verge of giving up; don’t give up! There’s no guarantees in life, but you’ve got to keep looking. I had essentially given up as well, especially in image-conscious and self-centered, LA. My prior relationship before Dean was two years earlier and that fella had cheated and was abusive. While searching for guys online afterwards, it was a never ending onslaught of hookups, or pretentious guys. I didn’t wake up that day knowing I was going to meet Dean, just as many others have said they didn’t expect to meet their partners on these comments. It happened, and it can to any of us at anytime.
Wow, thanks again guys for all the kind words!
Cool! Good luck
congrats guys i’m so happy for you and jealous too. Thought i’d found mine cpl yrs back but he had other plans so I’ve moved on. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE
Noticed that every guys that wrote, “No Asians”, “No Small Cocks” or “No Shorts” on gay.com or A4A.
Asian boys got no lucks, no dates, no boyfriends, no real friends or no husbands.