Gay Stuff : Sexual Interests And Energy
When you surf the Adam4Adam site you will find a wide variety of sexual offerings from which to make selections—like a restaurant menu! One element in common is the mutual desire for a stimulating sex partner who desires the same pleasures and is in sync with you. Sometimes, your surfing produces quick results—other times it can be a start and stop experience as you begin the process of determining what the other guy wants in the sexual adventure—whether for a single event, or for a possible LTR (long-term relationship).
If your profile is clearly defined, you will have less confusion finding a compatible playmate. If you are a defined top then state that fact! If you are not a versatile/top, then avoid that notation in your profile. From my review of the site over several years, there appear to be more bottoms and versatile/bottoms than there are tops and versatile/tops. Clearly the tops are in demand by guys who want to be penetrated!
Some guys will respond that “age is but a number” while others will clearly state an age range to meet their particular desires. Unfortunately, some younger males perform like senior citizens because of stress-related work, lack of energy, etc. Some senior males perform like guys much younger because they can maintain erections. (Surprisingly, some males in their 80s can perform like bulls!) As for Topping: I believe there are males today who could enjoy being in a top role, but defer to bottoming because they have issues with maintaining erections—some are clearly erectile dysfunctions—and can be alleviated through medication.
Good health is important to males of all ages. Exercise, diet, lifestyle, and vocations can impact the health of any male. If you have not had a physical examination lately, then consider having an exam performed by your health care professional. Stamina is needed to thoroughly enjoy a sexcapade with a desirable playmate. Don’t limit the duration of a very special event to being a “quickie” when you really want more!
David M in Texas
P.S. Vitamin D deficiency has come to the foreground in recent years. Libido is usually stronger if Vitamin D is present in your body at recommended levels.
Yeah, I’ve met alot of big dicked bottoms within the past 5 years. i think some of the erectile dysfunction is psychological. People want to attach sex with intimacy and in our hookup culture that’s not always possible. After a while, its hard to be stimulated by casual sex b/c you’re so programmed to be “on to the next one” instead of being in the moment.
That brief essay was on the mark. A profile gives a basis for another guy to know whether he should look there, and it gives a base for conversation, flirtation, negotiation. As for the fatigue and stress comments, those are truly good. I have a bisy life, and I have had times when I couldn’t sustain because of fatigue. A bad attitude from the other guy killed what was left. On the other hand, I had a realistic guy who made it fun for us both with playful measures to get it in. Mutual fun with realistic understanding beats the pornstar demands. It should be fun, not stressful. A fun first meet can make a lustier second one. Definitely I can vouch for that. But that was a good essay, especially with the reminder about health. Good health enhances sex, and stress-free sex enhances health,
I clearly state in my profile what I’m looking for and I always get the opposite. A lot of the men on here, especially in my area don’t understand the words “not interested, no, leave me alone, not my type” and then you get called some rude, nasty, and sometimes offensive name after you kindly told them no 50 million times.. I’m all for perstitence, but even I know when to stop. Blocking them does nothing cause they create another account with a different e mail addres, so they hit you back up bugging you all over again. Reporting does nothing either, cause I get people from other websites bugging me to go to their websites.
As far as topping or bttming many people clearly state whether or not they want bttms or tops, the problem arises when people but vers in in their profile, which a lot of people assume that the “vers top” is a bttm, “vers bttm” is a bttm, and fully vers is a bttm. That’s not true at all. Not everyone is a bttm or wants to bttm or top all the time.
Health is important, so me personally I always play safe and try to be and stay healthy. So as a rule of thumb, I don’t do drugs or meet or hook up with people who do drugs..
I’m a verse top. Sometimes I like to be penetrated just because sometimes I like to feel nor in charge and get in touch with my feminine side. I’m not a fem though. It’s just nice to let go every now and then.
Funny you should mention about vitamin D deficiency, just today on news the medical people claim most people do not need extra D in there diet, and to much vit D weakens your bones and other organs, so be careful of any advice here, consider talking to your Dr. before believing in everything you read here.
Good article. A well documented profile does help in making better matches. I am constantly surprised at the blank profiles or lack of information. My initial reaction is that if they cannot be bothered to fill it out, then why should I bother to contact them (even when they state, just ask me).
Furthermore, I wonder if age is verified to ensure minors are not participating. Although, I do not know how that would be done on the website. But it also brings up the age stated in the profile. After initially filling in the profile, many do not go back to update the information. I know of one person that states they are fifty-something and in reality they are sixty-something. Their age in my circumstance doesn’t matter to me, but it might to some. I would think it would be a simple thing to enter a birthdate and have the computer server update the age automatically.
David, Please provide more information as to how Vitamin D helps the libido.
The main source of Vitamin D is found in sunlight and it is usually effective for low levels of phosphate in the blood, low blood calcium, softening of the bones, psoriasis, bone disorders and rickets. But I am unable to find any research supporting a stronger libido.
The main source of vitamin D is not sunlight. Sunlight helps transform the “base sterol” made in the skin to the inactive form of vitamin D. The inactive vitamin D is transferred to the liver and kidneys where it is converted to active Vitamin D.
So, if you have low sterol production in the skin, live where you have limited sun exposure, kidney disease and/or liver disease, you may need vitamin D supplementation. Currently, there are no recommendations for vitamin D screening, despite having levels established for insufficiency and deficiency.
I also recommend being careful about Vitamin D data. Here in southwestern PA, as high 90% of the population requires Vitamin D supplementation.
Overall good health = good libido.
Tall_bttm
The only way you can verified information of a someone’s age from this website is by meeting them some neutral place and check their ID. Trust me when I say this, there’s a lot of minors on here with ACCTS that are using phoney birth dates (had a friend get arrested for meeting a minor from here & wasn’t till they saw his profile on here did they drop charges against my friend)..
What he says is true especially umong the younger generation because they dont get enough of sun light to make vit D. The computer generation doesn’t get out of the house that often
The top/vers/btm labels may not always reflect the mood of the guy in the profile – usually I pass by other tops unless there is an angle where we tag team a third guy’s ass.
But I do get hit up by a lot of guys who list themselves as tops, which I don’t mind at all. I’ll plow a hot fucker who gives up his hole to me, heh.
there is a difference between a “true bottom” and a guy that just likes to get fucked…
a good bottom (exclusive) really enjoys the position and sees it as a position of strength… the bottom is truly in control… and gets his pleasure from pleasing the top.
top/vers – vers guys that just like to get fucked I find do not show a lot of interactive passion when they bottom … they are just interested in getting their hole plugged…
And then there are the top/vers – vers guys.. that in the middle of them getting fucked…
if they cum first… its over…
Not totally true though, my profile clearly states what I’m looking for and how I do stuff (meeting personally, know at least the other person’s name, exchange info, etc), yet every day there’s at least one other user just sending me an ass/dick pic and wanting to hook up.
A lot of people don’t give a crap about the profile itself, they just look at race, height, sexual role and hiv stat…maybe age, but anything other than that is totally trivial. A4A ‘is’ a hook up site but I have yet to find ONE gay-related site or app that isn’t an online fuckfest.
I’m turned on by a guy who knows what he wants and is able to communicate it. I get irritated with guys who are hesitant, aren’t even sure what they like or don’t like,or talk a big bravado and then you meet them and they want to talk about your job or the weather or something. I’m all for a chat but if you told me all about how you love to suck dick and take it like a champ then that’s what I’m expecting, not a dissertation on weather patterns. Clearly define things and have good follow through, both on here and in life.
I understand we are out for a hookup, but can’t we just take our time once we do meet?
I am a total bottom and state this on my profile. I also state that “quick cum dumps DON’T interest me.” Yet, most of the time, this is what I get. Tops just want to use me to bust a nut then go. There is a great deal to be said for naked body contact and cuddling. Let’s slow things down guys and enjoy the time we do have together.
Interesting comments boys (and boys)… The net has opened up the world to gay people yet we still lack the fundamentals of what it actually means to live side by side our fellow hetro’s. If anything, the barriers we faced in the 60’s returned because of the net. When we had no other way of meeting someone, there was more at risk. But now with the easy access provided by A4A and the rest of the mating sights, we’ve lost a sense humanity, and a sense of humility. Advise can be found everywhere on the web. But is it sound or accurate. There are many predators out there, and we need a safer approach to finding love and/or human touch. I have no answers. But it depresses me to read the profiles of the regular, the naïve and the wicked… all of whom seem to be searching for the same thing. The truth of it all comes by knowing yourself and remembering that the best way to interact with fellow human beings doesn’t require a modem.
I’ve been fortunate to have numerous good connections through this site (and a couple of others). I generally just avoid contact with guys with profiles in which the guy is looking for something that’s not a match. And if a guy has a profile that’s too brief, that’s an indication that he either isn’t serious or just has no understanding that effort has to be put in on his end to “sell” himself. For me, there’s an indication that not much good would come from any quick encounter we might set up so one should be avoided.
On the other hand, when solidly written profiles point to a match, that’s a good start. From there, it’s a matter of brief discussions about wants, likes, dislikes, etc. up front before meeting, If a guy is willing to talk for a bit (not countless messages, but a good few), that’s a good sign and usually leads to a successful first meeting. If a guy isn’t willing to invest the time to “seal the deal” … or worse simply vaporizes without a decent reason or graceful exit mid-discussion … that’s frustrating/annoying. And if discussion indicates there’s no match, that’s all for the better.
A real issue (pain) for me above and beyond profile information is guys without basic manners. I’m happy to miss meeting up with guys who believe they are God’s Gift to All Men and are, therefore, somehow so deserving and entitled that their being a gentleman is unnecessary.
I agree with alot you have to say [hunter0500]there are a lot of rude men on here some are just assholes you can be talking to them next thing you know they just quit talking in mid discussion or they might ask a question you answer and thats it they stop i find that to be very rude and immature now i know how women feel and why there getting tired of men so im getting offmen going back to women so all you rude bastards go fuck yourself