Gay Stuff : Too Old, Too Young or Just Right?
With the expanding “Daddy culture” currently in play, age differences of more than twenty years suggest a profiled guy may be interested in playmates around their own age or interested in males many years older or younger! Some A4A members feel their targeted playmates will be around their own ages, but fail to realize that there are many members who are looking further. Some members feel that surfing for suitable playmates more than twenty years older or younger is not acceptable. They may even be referred to as cradle snatchers, or perverts.
Many 20-something year’s old males are interested in guys in their forties and vice versa. When asked about playmate preferences, these younger guys indicated they wanted something more intellectual, more secure, and a playmate that has already experienced some of the twenty-something culture and lifestyle. The older males seem to be looking for vitality, stamina and intellect.
After the sexual heat and cum explosions have subsided briefly, there are opportunities for playmates of any age to have pillow talk time on subjects ranging far and wide—not just about sexual pleasure. Diversity in culture and experience is a powerful component to a relationship. If just a hookup, this may not be relevant. However, some relationships began as hookups!
So, if you are targeting a specific age group, speed up the surfing process by providing info in your profile on your desired age group. And make sure to include your age as well for others to find you when they use the search feature.
SexCounselor4U
I’m in my mid fifties, I can no longer fuck all night but as the song lyrics go: I’m not as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was. I say this because most kiddies(early 20ish) want a quick anonymous one time suck or fuck and poof they’re gone like the wind. Yet they have “high” standards. I tend to stay away from younger guys as I find them for the most part to be total flakes.
I prefer hookups with guys 30 and up, they’re more grounded and less unpredictable. We’re not looking for that perfect hookup, we’re looking to bust a nut, pure and simple. If the lights are off and your eyes are closed does it really matter that I don’t resemble Michelangelo’s David?
Younger guys seeking that daddy or gram-pa experience are the exception to the rule for me. They know up front what they want.
Age has never been an issue to me as long as they are of legal age to indulge in sexual encounters.
I do find that most “younger” guys are mostly looking for that “conquest” rather than enjoying a moment of passion.
That said, there are exceptions to every rule.
I’m sorry, but I don’t find guys 5+ yrs. older than me sexually interesting. They might be attractive, but I’m just not wanting anything “physical” from them.
Which, yes – you CAN call it ironic that I’m looking for 18-40 in my profile.
I find the whole idea of outright rejecting anyone because they don’t fit into a specific age demographic confounding. Even when I first came out I was attracted to men of all ages. The funny thing is that as I approach my 50th birthday, I am a better lover than I ever was at 20. I know so much more and am comfortable in my skin. I am able to relax and totally accommodate my Top’s style and needs. I even literally get wet and have multiple orgasms from getting topped which never happened when I was young. My point is that anyone who would pick my 20 yo body over my current one would actually be getting less. Funny when you finally get great at something the chances to use it diminish.
I have never thought of age when I was younger or now that I am older. The enjoyment and thrill of making love with a nice guy is and always will be the most IMPORTANT.
I agree with Marko. I am 68 years young and still have “needs”. The younger guy looking for an older daddy and grandpa are definately the exception to the rule. The younger guy (30 yrs and less) that don’t give you a second look because of only the age are missing the boat, in my opinion………..
When I was in my 20’s I loved nothing more than a guy in his 40’s, little greying going on, little rough around the edges, experienced. Now that I’m approaching my 50’s I am still into the late 30’s and 40 year old guys, same look, type, etc. having said that, I’m starting to get hit on by guys 19-25. At first I was completely taken back and thought “I’m not into kids, I’m getting grey and white, and not as fit as I used to be”. Thinking back, I WAS that kid looking for fun with a guy pushing the grey side, etc. Should it be an issue? Not at all! I was for 2 consenting adults when I was 19-20, nothing has changed. I will say this; I have seen a lot of younglings criticizing the men 50-60+. We should not forget these are the men who challenged the system in a time when being gay/bi, whatever was no where near accepted on the level it is today. They deserve our Thanks and Gratitude, and maybe a BJ (trying to be funny).
older guys are super hot, and a lot of fun and generally speaking WAAAY better at sex than younger guys.. it took me a LOOONG time to appreciate this fact and for years I was a total jerk in person and especially online to guys even a few years older than me.
It took dating a younger guy who was into much older for me to realize this and I would have never found out if I had not been dragged along to 3ways etc.. Since then I’m only interested in younger guys if they have a natural wild streak and have an above average skill and experience level for their age. Now I genuinely feel attracted more to hairy guys who are bigger, 10-30 years older.. I had this fear that I would be 80 or 90 and still only turned on by super young dudes. BOTH older and younger still turn me on but my tastes are slowly maturing and I can happily say that attraction is not just something that is unchangeable you are born with, attraction is “learned” and driven by experience.
A lot of guys may disagree with me older or younger but i’m not trying to change anyone — just suggest to keep an open mind as much as possible and you might just surprise yourself!
Having met many great men who cross all kinds of “requirements”, I’m amazed. Well, amazed and pleased at the acceptance I’m awarded as a “middle-aged white guy with no abs to speak of”. If age … or race … or build … or ethnicity … or having facial hair … or others … are a “must” for you, thank you for making that clear in your profile. I’ll move on. For the great guys I’ve connected with who have not drawn “stupid” lines in the sand … well, you know what good times we have had or regularly have.
I find it hard to believe that in the times when we are struggling to be identified not only as men, but men who love other men, that we have to deal with what I find narrow and shallow thinking when it comes to engaging someone who is a certain age group. I’m a older brotha who can proudly say,
I not only look younger than I am, but can last and out perform most younger guys who think that age is a factor. I don’t say that to brag,I say it because I took care of myself in my youth, as I do today. I tend to stay away from the shallow thinkers, because that kind of thinking tend to matriculate into the bedroom. Profiles are the first impression as to one’s intellect, maturity level, etc. I’m currently in relationship with the love of my life who is 15yrs younger that me. What brought us together was not what we could do in bed, but what was suppose to be our contemporary in age didn’t measure up to what was suppose to be a”toe-curling,” experience. So to you younger brothas who think you all that, keep on sleeping on the older brothas…….LOL
(aw, great.. here we go..)
I am very upset with my age. I’m now 65 and wonder why I have to be this old. Well, we all know, as the years pass we don’t get any younger. Sex has always been a big part of my life, be it guy or gal, 2 guys, groups, TS, TV, etc, I have always wanted more sex than ever, even now. I am bi, wife knows and accepts it but doesn’t like the idea of me meeting guys. Well, the biggest problem I have today is that hardly anyone wants anything to do with older men like me. Yes, it takes me longer to get hard and squirt, but I still need that hot good feeling that I get when I get turned on and cum. I need guys to get off with, make love to, get kinky with, and more. I need friends as well. Most of the guys on here and other sites, check out my profile, see my age and I never hear anything from them. Occasionally I get replies, such as “I don’t fuck my grandfather”. I wasted so much of my younger years being “moral” as that seemed to be the thing to do. Now I regret it. Back in my earlier days, anyone who had sex with someone of the same sex was considered weird and an outcast. Now I”m old, and no one wants anything to do with me. I am always open to have fun with older guys or younger, but even the older guys are just looking for young twinks. I so bad wish I could turn back the years.
Me personally I like them with +/- 5 yrs of my age. If too young all they want to do is go clubbing, get high, and mooch off people and if too old they seem to be desperate and needy. I need someone who is my equal nothing more, nothing less. Since when is it a badge of honor to be label a “sugar daddy” or a trophy boy’? No thank you.. I have a dad that’s still living and I don’t want a so-called “son” who doesn’t have half of my DNA. Each their own but for this guy I like them right around my age..
Love older guys. I’m 35 and guys older with some gray and wrinkles are hot. Hit me up older guys would love to hear from you
I’m 46 and I tend to go for younger guys. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m aging and I’ve embraced my “Daddy” role. The younger guys go for it and it helps that I have the “Daddy” look. I am tall, muscular, and sporting some scruff. I have the distinguished salt and pepper hair and the alpha personality to complete the package. I get a lot of response from the younger crowd. I want a hot gym bodied bottom and more often than not it’s a guy a lot younger than me. It’s just a hookup, so I don’t see the harm in having some fun with someone as long as they’re a consenting adult.
Well, I’m 25 and I love (SOME)older men. If they have standards, act their age, and are sane.
I had always love getting it on with a younger guy. since i came out in my teenage years, there’s been a couple of times that i did it with a person 10 yrs older then me but they didn’t look their age. being 50 now, its amazing how many over 35 – 40 that didn’t age well. its been awhile since i even went out with anyone my age or over since they look like their breathing dust… that’s why i enjoy playing with 18 – 30 although the 18 – 20 seem flakey,
22. I admit it, I have been with older men only for sex but at least they knew the deal. Sometimes though they get way too comfortable with my presence and want more and that is when I am gone. Like I am sure you are attractive and a nice guy but I cannot spend my life with someone twice my age.
Personally, I’m more interested in men below age 30 for romance because I do not want someone who has, “seen it all.” I want someone who can keep up and share my experiences with me. I also want someone who grew up in my culture and thus wont have any awkward silences when we re having convos.
And for the record, not all of us youth like to go clubbing and doing drugs. That is a terrible stereotype that doesnt fit most of the youth.
I agree with Marco, most times I get turned off by a lot of the younger guys spend more time rejecting those who don’t fit the perfect mold. But what they don’t realize is that they will become trapped in the same mold placed on them by the next generation. When I was in my 20’s 30’s and 49’s I dated within my age group, but I didn’t make anyone else feel un worthy for paying me a compliment. It’s all about respect for another human being. It seems like people think that good manners are out dated. They are tried and true, and if used appropriately, everybody wins.
I am being pursued by a man 43 years my junior.
As an out if shape 62yo I know I should be flattered that ANYone shows interest at all. And on one level I am. But I have to confess it makes me a little uncomfortable. I mean, he could be my grandson!
He is very sexy, but at this point we gave only chatted online, exchanged text. And he keeps sending pictures of his beautiful big dick, which I admit turns me on. But he’s SO young.
Anyone who has been in this situation please advise me on how to proceed. Thanks.
i’m 43 going on 44 years old in a few months and i neither fit into the ‘daddy’ look or any other ‘subset’ of gay men — bears, otters, foxes, daddies, twinks, etc…. i normally am into dudes around my general age (+/_ @ 5 years in a utopian dating/sex world)….
the things i consider to be a significant pet peeve following my initiation into the 40’s age bracket include the following:
— when someone tells me: ‘you look SO good . . . (wait for it) . . . for your age!’ . . just leave out the last part and it’s a bonafide compliment! but i’m not that neurotic so as to not accept ‘back-handed’ compliments with grace and an authentic ‘thank you!’… what choice do i have, really? well, other than to become (cue to me gagging myself with a rusty fork) some age-resisting, anti-agist voice (ala madonna, who should have retired AT LEAST a decade earlier…like she needs the money!) we all know what’s her true currency? the limelight that is her life and all the youthful requisites that are included – nothing you can fault her for, really…just watch her first video: Borderline; think she had a fucking CLUE as to what enormous, never-before-witnessed destiny awaited her?? hell, even her dancer in the video, jellybean, became a HUGE part of the house movement during the heyday of vinyl and the birth of house music in general (jellybean records sound familiar?) but regardless, she just can’t see a second beyond the power she wields so flippantly along with a bottomless ocean filled with vanity and the need for constant validation and edification.
okay, can you say, ‘but i digress!’…? other than madonna, the only one who has the same ‘demigod, whatever-i-say-is-doctrine, thank-me-for-gracing-you-with-my-presence, my-kids-blocked-me-on-social-media-and-are-hating-on-me-big-time’?? answer: BETTY DAVIS
back to my pet peeves regarding the 40’s? i’ve never been approached online and on apps like grindr by more 18-low 20 year-olds looking for a dude who has experience and still has a body of those 10 years younger still in dope shape..the problem? they think that because they possess ‘YOUTH’, a commodity nearly every gay man considers to be priceless and numero uno on the ‘list of gay priorities’, followed by beauty, money and finally, power. forget humor, intellect, knowledge, POV, respect for the past, and so much more the ‘twinks/grommets (surfer term for twink FYI’ can’t possibly appreciate, such less acknowledge…a vast majority, i feel, want a hot older dude who has a body that is superior to their 20+ year-younger self, and just expect the older dude (aka: ME) be the one doing all the fucking work, as if they are entitled to be lazy dead fish, with no concept of the term: reciprocity…other than that, the 40’s have so far fucking ROCKED! and the best part, even the youngest most ego-ridden morons will eventually get their chance to rock the same 40’s i now find myself in the midst of doing. i wish to age gracefully, imparting wisdom along the way (on deaf ears, but still….) and lastly, to look better and be hotter than anyone within 10+ years of me….cuz 40 or 30 or 20, HOT IS FUCKING HOT!!! xoxo
and i have to add this last caveat:
when i was in my mid-twenties and serving like any other hot bodied sexy young fucker, i had my first sexual experience with someone who was 41 years old (at least that’s what he said..haha)…not only was he SO FUCKING HOT and had a body my 20 years more youthful one severely envied and was jealous as hell of; i could only hope, somewhere in the outskirts of my subconscious, that i would be lucky enough to have when the very-VERY-then not that very far off day when i would be also in my 40’s inevitably and finally transpired…not only was his body one of the hottest i have ever looked at (much less fucked: which he did with an artistic-like talent i had never before felt or experienced to this day), he was one of the sexiest and most handsome as well….yes, we fucked and it was amazing and STILL: i fucking FREAKED THE FUCK OUT! my vanity and ego and sophomoric attitude and youthful enslavement actually denied me the full gamut of pleasure and eye-opening experience i was gifted with, really. instead, i fucking lost my shit and acquired for years after, some mutated and totally biased and LAME AS FUCK attitude towards sex between a boy (ME, and STOOOPID as hell, trust!) and a man (the guy over 40 who rocked my socks off)….so if you are in your earlier years and have had the same feeling, just be secure in knowing that it’s just due to your YOUTHFUL IDIOCY and TOTAL SELF ABSORBED and TWISTED, DISTORTED view on life and age and beauty and sexiness and graceful aging….hell, i led the way in that DUMBFUCK DEPT…..!!! don’t fall into the same lame trap i did back yonder, when life was much simpler and i walked to PROBE in the snow with no shoes on….or was that on the way home after the club? LOL
As the saying goes, youth is wasted on the young….
I’m on my mid twenties dl and I use to not be into daddies, after giving a few a shot…I love daddies. They are so much better in bed. They have so much experience and wisdom. They can hold a conversation so much better then a younger guy. I feel they also try harder then when I’m with a younger guys. And guys in Central Florida please message me
im 35 and i see that people younger then me feel that anything over 30 is considered old they only want you for your money not your companionship. and the older guys wants younger guys because of there youthfulness. so us guys in the middle are stuck with heartaches and games players. its hard to find what your looking for these days. the dating/hookup game has changed a lot.
Jhorn’s profile does not include anything specifically about wanting older guys. An update would attract the guys not hitting on him now.
I have always been a strong believer that age is only a number. I look around at my peers and realize that many of them are “Old Men” while some are vibrant, interesting and strong lovers. It all comes down to attitude and self-care. I have been told by many younger guys that I am passionate, responsive and wear them out.
I have always found confident, strong men of any age who know who they are and are comfortable with themselfs to be attractive. A confident man just seems to make a better lover.
I must admit that now that i am 76 I still do admire the young, well built men but often find their insecurities and lack of experience to be a bore. I believe it all comes down to that complicated thing called “attraction” that none of us can really explain.
Different for me, I am in my twenties and most men who hit me in A4A are men who in their mid 40s and 50s even 60s. I love daddies they are so hot. They usually say that they like younger looking guy like me. When it comes to sex, they want to dominate me. Hot raw sex is what they want
As far back as I can remember, so a long time since I’m 56, college age guys (guys in their 20s) were always hot to me. When in middle or high school I wasn’t attracted to other teenagers – loved my college years!!! When in my 30s, 40’s and now 50’s I remain attracted to good-looking young men in their 20’s. I can say that my preferred age cohort has always been guys in their 20’s – why? I have no idea. My profile clearly states this.
My strictly self-enforced policy is to never hook-up with anyone younger than 21 even if they’re hot. (My policy negates the possibility of dad or cops knocking on my door looking for junior) I have declined many offers from 18 to 20 year old men.
I live in a university town and have been surprised at how many times college guys have pinged me and asked if I wanted company, even athletes. But, most of the time when I ping a 20-something guy with a message of “nice profile, hot pics man” (my opening line to see if a young man is interested) I am called a creeper, blocked, or asked for cash.
The manners of most of the entitled gay-youth are appalling. When I am pinged and not interested in the guy, I always respond with respect by simply returning the compliment and stating clearly that I’m not interested. Young guys need to expect to be hit on when they’re on A4A. Clearly stating who they are wanting to meet avoids most of these unwanted contacts; however, they should also be mature enough to decline the offer with respect.
All persons, including gay guys should treat others with dignity. There is no need to insult another person unless that person’s behavior is harassing or offensive. Another policy of mine is to respond in kind.
Peace my friends!
UTfool123 is saying much of what I have stated here on A4A. If you indicate your interest in a specific age range and what you are wanting to enjoy, you will attract more surfers who want what YOU want TOO. Yes, some guys will never take the time to read profiles and will charge ahead, so be prepared for their uncaring responses.
On
A4A I only approach guys near my age or older (70 yo) but have responded to approaches from younger guys. On A4A that has usually not been fruitful.
At clubs and baths, i usually hook up with guys my age. I remember one special night at Clubhouse II in Ft Lauderdale when a 20 yo in good shape “picked me up) at the bar. We had a night of fun in my room and the steam room. He wanted a daddy. I am a total bottom with guys, and he was a very enthusiastic top. But what was most enjoyable were the conversations we had while cuddling. It was a therapeutic time for both of us that I still remember fondly.
My point is, age is relative, but allow it to happen and don’t push.
I surf A4A often observing the contents of profiles. When I notice a profile that especially could benefit by having an age range of prospective playmates, I message the owner and make a suggestion.
WOW>>>the number of young twentysomethings that consider my comment an intrusion is staggering! Too often they fire back with a “mind my own business” response and then BLOCK me. This adds further proof that twinks and early 20s are in a group that is not worthy of consideration by anyone who really is wanting a relationship. They aren’t up to it.
I am 44 n black …older guys i have met act way childish or they dont take care of themselves physically.I am not saying u have to look physically fit like u in ur 20ies but at least lose tgst gut and younger guys either they dont wanna conversate but go straight to the bed n get paid for it after ur fuck their brains out. Am bi myself so when there is a draught on the men side i always go back to the other side……I know we all got eat but dont make getting money ur priority u might be missing out on good dudez just because u thirsty for cash
as a 62 yr old man in average shape. i have been stunned by some of the guys that hit on me and by the ones i hit on. i agree with what many have said. i love their youth and beauty and exuberance and big loads. i to live near a college town Iowa State U and have been lucky enough to enjoy several of them. one young man was wrestler on the squad and went to the national tourney. i hooked up with him many times over his years at school. i only wish he was versa. i have a trophy boy i seen a few times a year. he is now living with a beautiful young woman. he was 19 his 1st visit to my place. he is all bottom with me. which i wish i could convince to top me because he has 8.5″ with a nice downward curve. we have made many vids and pics. the 1st time here he was totally smooth i’ve seen him mature he is getting quite hairy. T and many of the others have learned that age and experience are not negatives. it takes me longer to get hard and i choose to wear a rigid cock ring that helps maintain a rock hard erection and my recovery time is a bit longer than it once was but if they stick around for round 2 or 3 that they will never experience wit a quickie fuck. the ones that do will get some great conversation and benefit of my worldly experiences and wisdom. my only regret is that i waited so long to embrace my gay side. i tried at the ripe age of 55 and never looked back…. DDDD
i forgot to mention that my 19 yr old is now 21 and he got hold of me on the morning of my 62nd birthday we had a wonderful 4 hours together. later that day i partied like a rock star with my unknowing family members smiling thinking of the great morning time i got to spend with “T”. some people may be shocked at what the age difference is between us. but don’t be , he was the one that hit me up and i got the surprise of my life when i opened my door that night 2 years ago about this time of year. oh yea he was here the morning of his 21st birthday back in Feb we like to get busy when he closes the door and get each other off but then we relax and enjoy our time together, when he does leave it’s always with a smile on both our faces and a ” I’ll see you later” his visits are not as frequent as they once were due to changes in his life but i will not ever give up my memories of our times together…. DDDD
When I was in my teens I loved older men inside me. Now that I’m older I love the younger guys better. They can shoot more cum and I love a lot of cum.
I just turned 66 this month. I always gravitated towards the older spectrum. It started for earnest in my 20’s, guys in their forties. In my thirties, 50’s, and in my 40’s had an affair with a guy in his 70′ that lasted many years. There were others in the mix closer to my age and I finally hunkered down in the midst of the ‘health crisis’, with a guy 5 years my senior. All our friends, and each of my previous lovers…gone. We felt as if shipwrecked on an abandoned island. The older guys always ‘knew their way around the block’ and enjoyed holding my hand in the ‘ins and outs’ of mansex. It’s been a good ride. My partner, now 71, halted our sex lives some time ago, ‘getting to old’ for such nonsense? We’ve never discussed it. It was bit of a transition when it came, but he knew of my sexual hunger from the get go and knew there was no changing ‘this animal’s stripes’ and didn’t try. We’ve worked together now for nearly 30 years and made a niche for ourselves in our work. Known but not well known. Sought after but not clamored for.
I cruise through the sex sites, mostly for eye candy, often some good chat, sometimes blocked for being too blunt or a wit that cannot be grasped or comprehended. Good kissing and a good sense of humor! Numero Uno! I get hit on enough to stroke my ego and offer compliments freely. No recipe necessary! Lol
I’ve a gorgeous married bi-guy I’ve seen for several years. But his bi-ness makes it always a hurry hurry rush rush scenario. I keep thinking, I’d love to make love to him but I think he’s afraid I’ll fall in love with him OR he’s on to his next conquest, hoping to get it right. But, he always circles back. I’ve recently pulled back and have focused more on the guy that I use to bump into the parking lot, drive off to a wooded area where I would, shirt up, trou down, get serviced to completion. He now hosts me weekly. He’s no looker. A tad older. ED issues, but wants nothing more than to pleasure me! We’ve discussed our ‘dynamics and he relishes his role! We search for a third to fill in any gaps! Lol
Life is good….esp. without all the drama often afforded on a4a, MH and SD. Yeesh! A guy could starve to death or drown waiting for a life preserver. You/Me/We are all not getting any younger…hopefully just a lot smarter!