Gay Stuff : A Successful Gay Marriage
We are now approaching the day when the U.S. Supreme Court decree will most likely make same sex marriage the law of the land. For those of us who have followed the evolution of marriage, the ultimate decision will not be the shocker of the 21st century! One of the tenets of early times espoused marriage as the cornerstone of family life. Little did our forefathers realize that same sex couples today would have families with children present in their households. So the old adage, “marriage and family go together like a horse and carriage,” must now include families with two fathers or two mothers!
I participated in the celebration of a same sex marriage in March 2014 when two of my gay friends, Danny and John married in Massachusetts and celebrated their marriage the following day in Houston, Texas. They are energetic workers for charitable organizations and have been recognized for their ability to raise funds for the benefit of health issues within the gay community. They are committed to each another and to sustaining a loving, caring household. When Danny proposed to John in November 2013, the event was in the midst of a social gathering with several of their friends present followed by months of preparation for the wedding. I remember their excitement—the same that one expects in preparation for any wedding!
When I think of Danny and John and their loving relationship, I am reminded of couples everywhere who build successful marriages together through “sickness and health” and “for better or worse.” Whether it is a heterosexual couple or a gay couple, they will face the same challenges as they become a loving, caring couple devoted to each other. Successful couples must build a solid relationship based on an understanding of trust, faithfulness and mutual consideration. That is not determined by sexual orientation—but by recognition that we live life daily and our love for one another is sacred. We are human beings—not robots!
If my prediction prevails, gay couples won’t have to travel to other states to get married—because that will be possible in all 50 states!
David M in Texas
If anyone wants to see a great recent film about same-sex marriage, find a copy of “Married and Counting,” the story of my two friends (Stephen and Pat) who started marrying in every state that allowed it, and have now been married at least 10 times.
As much as we want to think that gay marriage is the same as straight ones,for many of us, that is just not the case. Our being outside the mainstream for so long, has allowed us to develop different relationships from most straights. The biggest difference in my experience, at least for men, is the sex play outside of the couple, whether it’s threesomes or open play with others separately. Many couples have not just accepted the existing marriage model, but expanded it embracing a more open sexual attitude.The biggest advantage of the legal tie was financial for us, healthcare,inheritance, etc…after 35 years we did not need the government to call us a couple, but the many legal advantages were essential rights that we took advantage of. A big step toward actual equality for gays.
Any union takes work and maintenance, if you do that it will last, if not it ends, I am speaking from experience.
Amen.
I’ll never understand why it seems ever gay in relationship or married has open one thats recipe for disaster
It is nice to know that the efforts of our men and women are going without notice. The push for all states to recognize all marriages is gaining momentum. We will get there. However, with each state making it legal is one more step to honoring our Fore Fathers’ notion of equal rights.
in the first line i meant aren’t!! Opps
Commitment , trust, mutual respect. The legalities makes sense. I would really have to be knocked over by love to do it again. Scary thought, really it is. But if it happens , I’m in.
I’m engaged to another guy, awaiting divorce decree from my wife. Hell, if I can put up with that for 22 years, being married to a dude SHOULD be a piece of cake! Besides…I love the guy…I really do. We’re that rare couple who just likes to be around each other for all reasons and no particular reason. We’re going to keep it monogamous to keep the bugs away. Besides, he’s about all I can handle sexually, and probably ever will be able to do so! We both are honest with each other about everything, which is FAR better than it ever was with the ol’ ball and chain. And he has the NICEST ass…. Having known him for 16 years probably makes this the world’s longest engagement, and now, we can just legally DO it. We’ll be in the Neiman-Marcus registry…
It’s cum along wayz baby. I had zero hope just a short time of some 20 yrs ago, when I found myself in the midst of my Sexual evolution..of becoming a gay Man…SO shocked some yrs later men are marrying men…time has melted my enthusiasm over the events, as in my region of the country there are few mature men that date, yet even think about being in a committed relationship, embracing and celebrating there relationship legally. But I will toast to those that do, risk and embrace there relationship via a ceremony and walk it down the isle as it were. Wish them the best…I haven’t met a man that has been able to turn my crank enough to even give it a second thought of any sort of committment beyond the next 5 mins. YA totally ambivalent and even sounds hopeless….Again wish those well that found there truer soul mates
I agree with you Bare. I am married to my partner of 8 yrs and we have a great, monogamous relationship. He truly is the only person I desire. We work on our relationship everyday, and I love him with every part of my being. I think the key to a successful marriage is to keep it spicy. You can keep your relationship as hot as when you first met, trust me. Have weekly date night, say I love you religiously, keep it sexy for your partner, and never take your partner for granted, and make your partner feel like he is the most beautiful person in the world. Finally, keep the sex spicy. That doesn’t mean you have to have an open relationship, because we will Never go that route!!! There is plenty of sexy underwear out there, and plenty of toys to make things interesting. A successful gay marriage means both of you giving all of yourselves to each other, not 50/50. If you are just 50 percent of yourself, the other 50 percent is somewhere else!!
The no fault divorce, for me, has made marriage meaningless. It is a legal entanglement I would never enter into again.
I can’t wait to attend my first same sex marriage. Some of my friends have marched and protested over the years to legalize same sex marriage in our state. Now, that it is legal, when I ask them now when they are going to get married, they say “why be in a hurry”. I’m all for this if you are in love and truly know what a marriage means.
Two of my friends have been together for a long time and I’m sure they were waiting for the legalization of same sex marriage in California…now happy as they’ll ever be, they are finally getting married this August.! Soo can’t wait to go see them and experience my first gay wedding.!! 🙂
I have been with my partner for 22 years.
Marriage would have had, nor will have any impact
on our relationship.
Wait, people on this blog who claim to be in monogamous relationships…and they are posting ths on a primarily hookup site? Or does this blog exist without going through the actual site?
Same sex marriage will be a legitimate proposal when same sex procreation is possible. Get a grip guys. Quit being a whiner.
I was ready to take the step 2 yrs ago things didn’t go according to my plan, i’m glad things fell apart when they did and not at a later date otherwise the pain would have been much worse, now if and when I find the right guy I would deff think about the big step, until that time I’m still looking and playing the field
My partner and I have been “legally married” since 1993.
We flew to Canada and saw the Registrar (in Canada, a Registrar is who marries people) and used our INITIALS on the marriage certificate.
NOTHING WAS EVER SAID. When we came back to the US, the Dept of State honored our “Canadian Marriage” and didn’t ask ONE QUESTION.
When my partner died, I qualified for Spousal Support/Survivors Benefits and have been receiving them for 8 years now.
I don’t know why gay/lesbian people need to make such a fuss.
GO LIVE IN NORTH KOREA IF YOU DON’T LIKE LIVING IN THE UNITED STATES.
SEE HOW MUCH “GAY RIGHTS” YOU GET THERE. (I notice that the majority of gay men these days who advocate for “gay rights” have absolutely no reason on the fucking planet to do so. They just want to make themselves heard/noticed due to lack of attention)