Stories : Nine And A Half
It was five minutes pass the six a.m. start of the Breakfast Hop morning rush and Damien Dieters had still not arrived for work.
Dale McGreavus, wrought with anger and sick with the boys continued insubordination, told his three cooks through the food window to keep up the good work and assured the host of his immediate return, charging her with the extra task of expediting the food to the servers. The old woman’s blank face left him unconvinced and he cringed as the front door of the restaurant flung open and entered a twelve top, followed by an array of other couples dressed finely for Sunday morning services. But the manager had to go, he had to call Damien or assure that another server was available to fill his spot if he was not to show up – which was likely for the seasonal worker.
“Take care of the customers, Agnes,” he pleaded. “I’ll be right back.” And with that he quickly rounded server’s wall, bore through the kitchen, and out of the back doors. On the loading dock he already had his phone and contact ready to dial.
But before he could, the stale scent of menthol flavored tobacco had encroached upon his senses. He followed the scent and transparent trail of smoke to its source; he stood pointedly at the bottom of the loading ramp; his skin tight black corduroys added significant depth the boy’s lithe hips and bubble bottom; his tiny package was compact and tight against his left thigh; he was drenched in a thin cloud of smoke that glowed a deep yellow in the rising sun.
But Dale could not appreciate Damien’s unique beauty. He was furious that the boy even had dared to show up late for his third morning shift in a row, more or less spark a cigarette before he clocked in.
Damien turned to face the tall bulk of muscled man that was his boss and owner of the Breakfast Hop. To the twenty year old youth the man looked like a hulky lumberjack disguised in loafers, slacks, and tie – pretending to be a distinguished business man. He had little respect for the military veteran, cared even less for his victories and prowess in Afghanistan, and the milky glaze over his baggy eyes, pale and spotted hairless face exhausted from a night of rolling gave his continuance no trace of adherence or patience that morning. Even the morning birds chirping and the wavering hum of cars on the highway seemed to irk the boy.
However Dale persisted conscientiously with every sense of martial vigor the marines had instilled in him (without forced cohesion) he said in a low roar, “Put that fucking cigarette out and go tend to your section.”
The foe-black haired boy balked at the notion of snuffing his cigarette only a quarter ways smoked, although a half of him was sensationalized by the immediate and stern tone of his tenacious, bald headed, wall of a boss. But he naturally gaffed, rolled his cold blue eyes, and flicked his cigarette into the parking lot before tromping by his employer and into the restaurants rear entrance. Dale could not help to notice the young half-man’s hips rigidly swaying in defiance. He would have flushed with red when Damien’s head doubled back to catch his boss staring as he walked away. Instead Dale locked his gaze, he had already been leering the boy down; violent frames of him fucking the boy into submission – like he used to do to the college grads whom thought they had it out to be officers in the core – gripped his mind for only seconds before the sound of piles of pork being dumped onto the flat iron stove sizzled him from his daydream.
Soon the restaurant was at full capacity, raucous with the clamor of patrons gossiping over coffee, the waitresses relentlessly – but somewhat quietly – menacing the cooks over the specificities of their orders, the cooks doggedly barking back their inconformity, while the busboys and dishwahers giggled and gawked as the five women servers and one male (that to Dale McGreavus’ standards was a woman nonetheless) scattered like chickens as they waited their sections with unorganized determination – he contended that he wasn’t the only one compensating with the urge to facefuck some bitching servers. Grudgingly, but shortly after, the first meals of the day were served and the restaurant was finally taut with poignant stench of fresh bacon, sausage, and baked dough coupled by the simple scent of Breakfast Hop’s house coffee.
Scores of sated churchgoers replaced scores of hollow bellied churchgoers until the morning rush had ended well into the late morning. At eleven-thirty, assured that the small residents of the town and Sunday travelers had had their fill by their mass quantities, he cut three of the morning servers, and convinced himself that he was ready to fire Damien Dieters.
The boy’s corduroy pants whispered between his thighs and catlike stride, while the heavy soles of his fatigue boots clumped a trail behind Dale McGreavus to his office at the back of the restaurant. Why the boy needed combat boots was a baffling query to the former marine. The boy had week arms and introverted chest that would likely cave in with the most minor of weight. He obviously not the outdoorsy type, McGreavus could tell that because of the heavy shone of boots’ toe. The marine could only guess for the sake of fashion, which in a modern sense had dreadfully disgusted the man and made little to any sense at all. Dale smiled cautiously at the last table of the section and was assured by them that the service, for a Goth, had been exceptional before he made the last few steps to the door of his office. He did not stop smiling, his focus intent on the nosey customers as he opened the door for Damien. But when the doors closed his face had hardened to a scowl that tensed every muscle in his large, lengthy, and hard body.
For a moment he felt as if he might have burst through the snug fit of his slacks and dress shirt and murder the insolent youth where he stood – smug and pointedly angled in the corner of the small eight by six foot office.
Mounds of contracts, towers of file boxes, countless piles of scattered paper ranging from spread sheets to employee applications mocked the employer’s organization. “Get a lot of work done in here?” Damien had softest voice of a birds tone, every word he spoke had an unintentional, even natural tune – the amiability of which was immediately lost with the reverence of whatever he said, more than likely to be an insult or smart ass remark.
Which, on a half note, was, but Dale was fed up and did not balk. “Damien your fired.” The pressure of Dale’s stomach alleviated as he relieved the words. “Give me your apron and get out of here.”
Like it was just a replay in his head (which being fired, McGreavus assumed, must have been a replay) the boy automatically removed his robe from his head. The myriad of arrangement of Pokémon, novelty, rainbow, and equality buttons the boy had pinned up and down the neck strap and across the middle base of his apron clacked and clanged with little vigor as he handed it over. The boy had made even his work uniform a beacon of flamboyance. His pale blue dress shirt was a few sizes too small even for his frail torso. But even still his, now former employer, could all but admire the boys thin but healthy, wirery yet shapely figure. Curiosity stalked behind Dale’s auburn brown eyes, unbuttoning the boy from collar to fly, lured by whatever magnificence that gave his generation so much refined, unworldly, and blindly entitled confidence.
In that moment Dale was fantasizing about breaking that confidence and repairing his poor attitude with sticky cum after he had crushed it under the weight of his stone-like build. He did not notice nor could he help the smile that reacted to that sordid imagination.
A little color had returned to Damien’s face from the morning rush and the glazed haze of his eyes was now clear and placid. He reacted little to the news at first; his expression and his demeanor showed no sign of resentment. Then, Dale had guessed, he realized that he was an adult now, with bills and obligations; a martial sense of responsibility was an irrevocable requirement with his new age and growing, although stunted maturity.
“I need my job.” The bass in his voice had darkened with building desperation. A formidable contrast to the high and eclectic tone Dale had gotten used to being chastised by. Now it was thick with remorse and pleaded thoughtful harmonies in a low and mournful pitch. “I have to make it to the end of summer. . . I won’t have anywhere to go before the term starts.”
“You have your parents,” McGreavus did not doubt. He plopped into his computer chair with ambivalence and began vainly sorting through his disarray of paperwork. For once in this miserable employer-employee relationship he had not felt emasculated; he was not slighted nor humiliated by the wicked head games of that little boy who was protected by law. Normally, or at least overseas, under the pretenses of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, McGreavus would have shown the boy true manhood on the very day his insolence began. However this land had constitutions and mandates while its people had rights and the liberty not to be raped into submissions. His victory over the boy was slight but sweet. At thirty-six he had not rejoiced for a sweeter resolve.
“Mommy and Daddy have nothing left for me; they don’t even know I’m back in town for the summer.” He replied, his voice still as low, slight with mournful desperation, but slow and seductive. Confidence washed over his expression like a revelation had warmly revealed itself from the deepest, most secluded and locked away parts of his psyche.
His seductive voice and the light bass he had added to its harmony shocked and stilled Dale all at the same time. He had been in this situation before, he knew where it was going and his dick was already pointing in that direction. But he maintained his dignity and remembered the thin walls of that small office. “Friends?” The question was airy and weak.
Damien rolled his blue eyes at the stupid question. “I’m staying with friends.” He insisted. His black bangs contrasted well against his ice blue eyes. For the first time Dale had noticed the ominous and ethereal essence of his dark hair that was cropped in the back but cut to hang low on one side of his face. The black was the theme, from his hair color to his fingernails. His porcelain skin, the antithesis of his ebon style, added well to the mystery of his demeanor what his disposition had retracted.
The almond shape of his blue eyes, the pout of his full pink lips, and the deep furrows of his brow coupled by the effortless debonair style of his speech was an entirely new side of Damien, unrevealed to Dale for uninterested proclivity. But this new Damien spoke with effervescent assertion; the color returned to the boy’s face in thin layers with each image that flashed back into Dale’s mind of ravaging and claiming the boy’s ego and he was sure that Damien saw them all from the look of anticipation building on his face.
And when he said, “I’ll do anything to keep this job,” after he had placed a hand on the inside of his boss’s thigh – that was firm beneath the taut fabric of his slacks – Dale had finally noticed the raging hard-on that distended like a heavy rod just before Damien’s fingertips.
Damien patted the tip of his boss’s clothed head which was blotted by a small sticky shade of saturation that was precum that had soaked through not only Dale’s briefs but his grey slacks too. Dale watched enchanted as the boy stuck the slick tips of his fingers into his mouth under slow bats of his eyelashes. And it was on.
Unbuckled and unzipped, Dale’s nine and half inch cock revealed itself like a blooming edifice – a straightening Tower of Pisa – until it stood tall and erect pulsing and flexing with life. His cock stood erect without the support of the marine’s fleshy abs that was not as hard as it had been in the service but still thickly toned and defined beneath a thin layer of lethargy. The marine was freshly shaved. His shaft was long, pink, and bottle thick. Torrents of blood brimmed veins pulsed their ways up, down, and around the glorious slab like scattered trails of cataracts that jerked the mouthwatering organ in rhythmic spasms. Wholesome, full, and healthy balls hung like weighty flesh grenades over the support of his briefs he had barely pulled down. Damien wanted to see them explode.
Without another word the boy’s pouty pink lips wrapped and worked the fat sensitive head of his boss’s dick. Damien sucked with great force until he was convinced that he had nurtured all the precum now available. He caught the warm, sticky, transparent fluid in mouth but did not ingest it; instead he went on to swallow the length of the cock in one fluid gulp, all nine and eleven-twelfth inches pressed his soft pallet and pushed pass his uvula until Dale could feel the boys rough lipped epiglottis gagging just before the ultra-receptive tip of his dick. The boy maintained the heavy length of his employer’s penis and murmured to vibrate the closed walls of his voice box and further stimulated the long cock, well in the deep of the boy’s throat.
The feeling was all Dale could muster without cumming so he pulled his length from the boy’s rigid throat. The sensation of retracting his dick from the boy’s deep well of warm salvia was mind numbing, the inner ridges of his throats anatomy catching and sparking burst of electrified fervor that ricochet through his towering bodying. Damien reacted with a deep gasp coupled by the sound of spit, membrane, and the soft pallets of his mouth. His eyes were watered and his face was flushed red but his expression was wanting.
The boy had an affliction for sucking and he was a master of his vice. His fingernails dug into Dale’s pelvis as he clawed the marine’s briefs from his tightly formed abdomen and groin. His loins hung like a marvelous set of bells housed in salty tissue lightly coated with strands of platinum hued hair. The boy pushed Dale’s fat cock against his midsection and gnawed the marine’s heavy clackers until they sounded a deep moan that exited his employer’s mouth in pure elation.
The marine threw his head back in a circle, looked down, and parted his dreamy eyes to glimpse through a haze of pleasure a sly and accomplished smile on Damien’s face, a sight all too familiar for the man that was just minutes before hell bent on ridding himself of the mischievous juvenile-half-man. He grunted in utter repulsion just as he grabbed the boy his earlobes and forced him from a fluid motion of lip stroking to full on throat fucking.
Dale grunted lowly and heavily after deep breaths of aggression; Damien gagged the sounds of a tormented animal in even lower grunts; his face turned a beat red; his nostrils violently flared with each struggle for breath; and four steady torrents of salty streams (one from each corner of each eye) blasted and carved trails down his bright rosy cheeks. The marine felt like he was literally choking the boy to death with his girth, but the marine also judged by both of the boy’s hands groping the cheeks of his thick and fury ass, Damien was enjoying it.
No matter how hard, how inconsistent, or how deep Dale had forced himself into the boys mouth, balls deep was just not enough to break the wanton little pig. Even with a full two handed grip of the boys silky black mane, the sound of the boys now gleamed coated cheeks clapping against his rock hard pelvis as he pounded away, was still not enough. Damien’s hadn’t even undressed his own cock to stroke the tense pleasure from it; Dale wasn’t even sure if the boy was hard. But that mattered little to him, the gothic creature was not his type anyway, he was rock hard, the muscles of his dick seemed like they were bursting from their skin seams, but not with attraction, with devotion to break that incorrigible ego. Dale decided it would not be broken nor penetrated from the mouth.
So he yanked the boy from his cock and Damien grimaced from the sudden pain of whiplash. But he stared back almost dissatisfied, the white of his eyes were a menacing red that contrasted heavily against his sky blue irises. He was truly a devil; Dale McGrevus had finally persuaded himself.
With a fist full of hair he pulled the boy to his feet. Damien reacted submissively and rose to a deep kiss so dispassionate, so rough, and so distant that when Dale removed the boy’s face from his own he noticed spots of blood on his lip where his teeth had cracked the skin. “Turn around,” he demanded. “Bend the fuck over.”
For the first time Dale was received by an expression from Damien that resembled a startled air of surprise and concern. “I-I’m a virgin.” The statement was airy and simple and his casual high pitched feminine tone had returned.
The marine smiled for a method of breaking the young stallion had finally revealed itself. “Fine, keep sucking.” He lifted and spun the boy upside down into an inverted 69 position. Damien laughed a soft and boyish laugh when Dale flipped the boy, confident he had escaped punishment.
By the tightness of his hole and the marine’s own experience, he accurately gauged the boy was in fact a virgin. And when Dale’s tongue penetrated the boys sweet pink barriers Damien reacted like fire, wailing and whipping his lithe muscle of body in sheer pleasure as he tried to sate his mouth’s appetite for dick. But what he did not know was that Dale was only half devouring the nectar of his boyhood, instead he was adding to it, more lubing the hole deeply than rimming it. He did not stop until his mouth was dry as cotton. The anatomy of the twenty-year-olds throat upside down was an entirely different sensation for Dale, but he had new and pressing motives of domestication he was dying to tend. He bit down on the boy’s inner cheek hard and Damien unsheathed the cock from this mouth and moaned. At that moment Dale flipped him back over on his feet, pinned his arm to his back and forced him to bend over the office desk and into full submission.
“No!” Damien tried to plea but it was too late. Big, strong, and rigidly calloused hands cupped his mouth and Dale began to work his way into the boy’s tight entrance.
“Don’t say another word,” his voice was heavy with bass on the back of Damien’s ear. His masculinity was settling the boy, but not fast enough. With his free hand Damien attempted to grab whatever was in his reach, sheets of paper flew wayward with his opposition. So Dale pinned that hand behind his back and sternly pleaded, “just relax. It’ll hurt less.” He reassured in vain, not really caring if it hurt at all or not.
He thrashed and fought violently in resistance, but once his boss had successfully pressed his golf ball sized head in with surprising ease thanks to his loads of saliva he had dumped earlier, and the pain had ebbed, slowly his body eased to obedience. The immense pleasure coupled by striking pain moved Damien’s curiosity to allow the hulky man to have his way. But before Dale could enter any further a knock came at the office door.
They were less than a foot away from the door, still partially locked together, when the chopped voice of Agnes stated her presence as the wooden portal began to part from its frame. Before the door had even cracked an inch Dale freed the boy’s hands of his grip and slammed the door in Agnes’ face, whether she fell or whatever happened, Dale did not care.
“Go away Agnes, I’m having pertinent conversation regarding someone’s employment!” You would have never told by the casual tone of his voice or suspected any wrong doing. Or that he was partially clothed but for his slacks that were around his ankles, a pair of knee high dress socks, and a disheveled unbutton shirt; Damien was buck, every item of clothing ripped from his gist, and strewn over a desk.
He looked the door, with the tip of his dick still tightly fitted in the boy’s entrance. The grip of Damien’s spit slick boyhood was not something Dale was willing to pass up so easily, so when he caught the boys flailing arms and pinned it behind his back again, he whispered with the greatest sense of accomplishment. “You want your job, right?”
And he did, for before he had time to answer, Dale unmercifully rammed the length and girth of his nine and a half inch cock balls deep into the boy’s virgin hole. Dale was impressed that he had not had to cuff the boy’s mouth or muffle his cry at all. He took the cock with the purest of dignity and showed the immense pain of his rectum being stretched and ripped all from the anguished expressions of his face. He only moaned of either acute affliction or of listless indulgence. But he endured with grace all the more. If the boy had had a hymen Dale had shattered it and everything attached to it.
The pressure of his cock throbbed with great pulsations under the intense grip of the boys insides. Damien felt ever juxtaposing throbs of the man’s cock inside him, the walls of his boyhood surged in response.
Damien’s back was a canvas of irregular and amateur tattoos, if not done in prison done in someone’s basement or garage. The shabby art ranged from black crosses, dead trees whose branches, at their tips, turned to birds, countless and colorful stars that formed no constellations, and much more. Dale’s attention faded with the pace of his fucking and soon the boy’s entire back was a blur of color as the marine plowed deeper into him until he was loosened and unbearably sore. Dale hadn’t even noticed that Damien had bitten into his arms to help consolidate the pain, his teeth had sunk deep but he was sure not draw any blood. But soon the worse was over and the boy was fully receptive, at that point of wanting, Dale removed his cock and began to coax himself with long strokes of his gleaming slab in the order of releasing a hot and sticky load.
He had half expected Damien to just lay there to gather his thoughts and what dignity that had remained with him, but the boy hopped off the desk and dropped to his knees and before Dale could blink his cock had disappeared into the boy’s mouth and he was fucking Damien’s face again. It was not long before he spilled his seed in sporadic jerks of fruition into and down his employee’s insensitive jugular. Damien smacked and licked his fingers and whatever traces of seed he had left on Dale’s body.
When he was finished, he clothed himself, and left the restaurant with his apron on the pretense of another day and a saved job. But he did not leave with the same jolly, indignant confidence he was so known for. Instead he walked with martial grace, his facial expression heavy, austere, and indifferent, even matured with the last few minutes, Dale had noticed. Whether it was for the sake of the restaurant and her patrons – which there was very few of in the hours of intermission between morning and lunch – Dale never knew. But the day continued just as fluidly and with little tension. The other employees were assured that he had squared the attitude from the devil himself, and that he had only sent him home for the day.
When he returned for his shift the following morning his section was clean and stocked within the first fifteen minutes of clocking in, which he did at 6am sharp. Although he had still dressed the same, he never wore a sour face of insolence from that day on. He was no longer cheery and overtly happy or deeply wrought with anger; his emotions no longer fluctuated like the highs and lows of rollercoasters. And when he addressed his boss, he did so with utmost respect, and reacted to his demands with the purest of loyalties.
But the one thing that stuck with Dale the most even after the seasonal worker went back to college that fall was the wonting looks Damien had given him every day since that day, that same look of dissatisfaction he had on his knees, minus its back drop of arrogant plunder. In its place, and on top of that ever wanting expression that became his new custom was a dreamy affliction to Dale. He had lingered dazedly around his boss like a puppy so socially deprived. His employer was his new drug and the boy was relapsing every day, and which each day he was thoroughly denied because he was simply not the Marine’s type – so set in his feminine ways.
And so, when the next summer promised his return, Dale had ambivalently waited in vain. The boy did not come back to work for the Breakfast Hop and the marine had finally rid himself of the confused product of an even more confused generation.
Jockey321 on A4A
This stroy was too long and drag out and wasn’t that good as well as alot of the other ones haha sorry
Now this is a story! It was thoughtfully and exceptionally well written. I could picture everything. Keep it up!
This is by far one of the best stories on here. It was well-written, sexy & provocative. If I wasn’t waiting for my boyfriend to get home and he wasn’t expecting my cum, I could have easily shot my load by just reading this story. Amazing.
Great story line from beginning to end! Some of the verbiage was a bit Norm Crosby type, but hey I knew what you meant and had no trouble transforming your words into erotic mental images. Thanks for all the time you spent bringing the story to us!!!
Those looking for a story to only last as long as it takes them to masturbate to ejaculation won’t appreciate this one.
Great job on the timeline and the imagery. Yes, it was long, but it was worth the wait. It leaves the door open for more … and the reader wanting it.
It’s a good story, and kinda hot. But HOLY COW and by the mother of the gods… PLEASE have stories proof-read before publishing. This was painful: spelling errors, grammar errors, poor choices in vocabulary, tenses don’t match, pluralities don’t match, etc.
Keep up the good work, but have your work proofed first.
Sorry about the mistakes guys, its a story from one of our members. Next time i’ll pay attention !
Dave
Not too sure about this story, r4pe is not a fantasy of mine though. Perhaps if the boy was willing to get fucked, it woulda been better
The author is trying too hard. Boring.
Good story
As a guy who was fucked for the first time by a 10- inch cock , I can attest to the boy’s feelings; this story made me feel that 10-inch monster in my ass again.
HILARIOUS!!!
even by internet mcporn standards, this is horrible. it is waaaaaaaay overwritten by someone whose vocabulary isn’t as large as they think it is, and who has no grasp of the basics of grammar, syntax, spelling or structure?
was there sex in it? i only got as far as ‘…the restaurant was finally taut with the poignant stench of fresh bacon…’ before i almost ripped my eyes out.
this doesn’t even work as porn satire. for that i recommend ‘next of kin’ by david sedaris or ‘strangers in parody’ on the nifty archive.
Yeah, the writing got in the way of the voice and immediacy. The characters don’t seem real in this story. Too overwrought to be hot.
I am SO sick of big dick stories and pictures. I would much rather see pictures and read stories of men with average sizes. In SCIENTIFIC studies, fewer than 0.1% of men have a dick this size-that’s one out of a thousand. In fact, only 10-20% of men have dicks above 6.5. Over 75% of us are in the average range-5-6.5″. (And yes-I’m average and proud of it!) Let’s not perpetuate the cult of the big dick-it’s just another way to demean 75% of us.
The writer tried too hard to use big words that just made the story unreadable and incomprehensible.
As a fellow contributor on this site, I want to thank and congratulate Jockey321 for donating his time to write this story for our enjoyment.
when I was l6 I had sex with my first woman but I didn’t feel complete I went to strip clubs xxx movies and I became curious so I began to watch the movies with the glory hole booths I sucked my first cock when I was 21 it was thick and salty with a fat bulb head which filled my mouth and made my cock rock hard my first time being assfucked was at 26 years old I was asleep my boyfriend raped mein my sleep he created a monster I love the forbidden sex and the feeling that im the woman in the movie being ass fucked
Stories do not require the use of every adjective in the English language.
Also, if you are going to use an adjective, make sure it is the correct one! I mean, really! What the hell is “foe black?” Is “significant depth” added to hips good, or just a fat ass?
Foe-black haired boy? What exactly is foe-black??
Okay maybe this one was a bit verbose and heavily detailed for those looking to get off in 3-4 minutes, with this you’d give yourself about 7-8 minutes and its not really porn. It’s an excerpt of a larger novel and all those words and detail are required. As for my verbiage and control on grammar, I’m reading the best American essays of the 19th-20th century and a lot of my style was influenced my the unconventional written styles of the transcendentalist. As for trying to hard? That’s the last thing we want our youth to do is try too hard to create something great, Right? I’m a college grad in technical communication my skill and wit and talent is sharp while I can understand some of those on here may not be as influenced by education and prose as I and so cannot appreciate the depth and complexity of this piece. However that does not give you rights to be such critics on a site that we definitely should be taking lightly. Rather being bitter you should be encouraging or not say anything because like so many have said before we’re better off united than bitter and alone.
Thank everyone else so much who took the time and trudged through my story and the great and encouraging reviews. I will be submitting my third and final story I’ll write for the site in the next few days …and don’t worry boys, I’ll write it at an eighth grade level (;
This story was waaay too long and so poorly written. The grammar errors alone turned me off to read any further. weeek/weak are two different words!
don’t type a story if you can’t fucking spell.
I read the story. I have read the comments. This is truly a case of love it or hate it. King said it best when he spoke of descriptions “Description begins in the writer’s imagination, but should finish in the reader’s” I think perhaps the author took it a bit too far. I do agree that the writer needs either a better command of the written word, or a beta/ proofreader. The best writers have them. I do not however, feel that this was a bad story. I do not understand the visceral reaction.
Maybe Porn can’t be high art, but I have seen people pay for stories that are far worse. -Can anyone say Handjobs?” ( not that I have anything against that publication)
The Author took a bit of effort and courage to allow us into his imagination. Play nice.
Too many Big Words ….but the story kept my attention from the beginning to the end !
Do you publish stories about safe sexual encounters? Or only stories about high-risk encounters such as this one?
Could’ve been hot but got way too verbose for quick erotic read.
I have never seen such a visceral reaction to fiction. Stephen King said that “description must begin in the mind of the writer, but end in the mind of the reader.”Could the author have trimmed his narrative a little? Possibly could he have not tried to use every word in his thesaurus? Certainly. Could he have used a Proof/Beta Reader or Editor? Definitely.
On the other hand this was his story. He had a right to tell it however he felt it needed to be told. I, for one actually like context and setting in my porn. Quick PWP’s do little for me and i like the way the author built the tension here before it’s violent release.
When you attack the quality of his work, just ask yourself, have you ever seen, or paid for worse than what you are getting for free. I know many of you guys read Hanfjobs and while I love the publication, it’s not high literary art- neither is this. enjoy it, or not- on it’s own merits and for what it’s worth.
As for the Voicer with the Avg. Dick… – It’s fiction. Reality must often times take a back seat to our idealized and stylized world when gratifying our baser instincts. Meaning- Whatever you fantasize about to get you off is fair game. I ma sorry that the majority of men with average or below average cocks fantasize about above average or even hyper endowments. But like the say in the press… “if it bleeds, it leads” in the world of porn, the bigger it is, the harder the audience gets.
in closing,
It took a small degree of courage to let us into his imagination, play nice while you are there
Call it want you want don’t call it high art because its still considered tasteless porn, but call it art. Art cause a variety of emotions not just one. I’m flattered by such a variety of reviews and feelings and expressions. I do need an editor but my story is to create a painting with words and tell the story not make sure that foe is faux (so picky) or to make sure that you see tight pants adding definition to someone’s ass. I will always do what I love and gawk at the devotion of my haters. This is art because it cause emotions ranging in a spectrum of love and hate… And that is what makes me an artist.
acquire one. if you’re gunna try to be bombastic, at least know what them big ole words you’re employin’ mean.
Well, Jockey, I was almost on your side until you decided that a thing that can cause emotions from love to hate is automatically art. The story is terribly overwritten, maybe that’s why some people are showing hate. Some people can’t paint, and I hate their work also. It doesn’t make them artists. It makes them no talent hacks. As for me, I’ve my dick has never managed to reach a “rough lipped epiglottis”, so I’ll just leave the final opinions to the rest of the guys.
so an old closeted marine takes sexual advantage of a young gay man who’s fallen on hard times. throughout the story he makes references to how he’s raped other young men in the military as well, and this is something you guys like.And on top of that ends the story calling the boy confused product of a confused generation as if he himself is this paragon of masculinity and hetorosexuality even though he just got done taking advantage of the boy in his office. This kind of stuff is what’s killing the gay community.so thanks for perpetuating a cycle of conflating homosexual culture to sugar daddy/prison rape culture that is found in places like africa and jamaica
The conditions were critical. They mainly suffered wounds caused by compression, broken bones and wounds on the chest,” he told AP.The ship was the Jolly Nero, of the Ignazio Messina & C. SpA Italian shipping line. According to its website, the Genoa-based Messina Line has a fleet of 14 cargo ships, with the Italian-flagged Jolly Nero listed as 784 feet long and 98 feet wide. cheap red bottom shoes
Hi, I found your site is very useful, can you sell a link to me? How about $50/month? This link is on the bottom of your site. If you want, you can publish your site on LinkWorth, then tell me to pay by paypal. My email: [email protected]. If you feel not interested, please delete my comments. Thanks!
Word for word, sic for sic… I have read this exact same article on another site. Simple cut and paste; The author should claim as such.