Gay Stuff : Profile Pictures
Keeping up with your profile picture could be a full time job. We all try to put our best pictures on our profiles, some of us put our faces and others put whatever they think their best asset is. What I am finding difficult to understand is this new trend of putting pictures of what we use to look like or what we want to look like….
I’m pretty active on A4A and will use the site to hook up or meet guys for coffee or dates. Now we are all attracted to what we like so when I come across something I like or when someone tags me and I like what I see, I will respond.
I have learned it is easier to meet in a public place because honestly you never know what is going to show up. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not shallow but when you present yourself one way and deliver another way that’s deception.
The only time I am surprised is when they show up and they actually look like their picture or better. Most times who shows up is a facsimile of what they posted on their profile.
I guess what I am trying to get across is be yourself and people will like you for it. There is no way we could update our profiles with every haircut but we don’t really change that much from day to day. Putting a picture of when you looked your best 5 or 10 years ago will not get you laid, unless you still look that way.
So click here and upload your best picture as your main….and a recent one….not one from 1993! 🙂
g skorich aka eastvalleyoral
With the advent of cell phones, came the cell phone camera… which in most cases, take really crappy pics (especially in front of a bathroom mirror).
It seems the quality of profile pictures are going down, unless you actually CARE about how you look.
Please keep this in mind when posting pictures. A good candid picture works so much better than a posed picture.
I usually look at the picture I think is LEAST attractive of the guy I’m talking to and assume that is about what he will look like.
Don’t get me wrong, I try to post the most flattering pictures of myself that I can, but keep ’em recent. If you go years in between flattering pictures of yourself, think about what that says about how you look.
When I get a message from a guy who has the same picture posted that was posted when I first signed up for adam4adam like 3 years ago, I don’t even bother to reply.
I’m glad to see more and more people moving away from professional photographs: A great photographer (and photoshop-er) can make any slag look amazing. My pix are always candid, if not corny, but at least you can see what you’re getting. I’m certainly no fitness model and I’m not interested in tricking you into believing I am by posting a great pic from 2002: I’d rather be told I look better than my photos than the other way around.
However, I am disappointed at how few people show clear face pix in their primary photos. It’s 2013: Who the hell are you hiding from?
what ever happened to the gay porn guy adam 4 adam was to get questions and answers from about gay porn?
Kevin, it will be up feb 24th 🙂
Dave
What? Now we have to post professional model pictures? Sorry, but most of us do not have the body, or even the entire package for that. Let’s stick that burden on the models, and the rest if us will cope with our mere cameraphone pictures trying too hard and smiling as hard and wide as we can to appear somewhat appealing. 😉
in response to Enzo AKA SoCalTuffGuy:
i’m not sure if you’re aware, but not-so-well-meaning guys can still take your pic right off of your profile to use for their own purposes. how do i know this? it has happened to me…at least twice that i know of. i don’t know about you, but i am not at all interested or prepared to have my face associated to what could be criminal activity (identity theft, anyone?). it’s easy to be cavalier about such things until you’re the victim.
oh- there it is
no one is saying to get professional pictures taken but there is no excuse for blurred pictures or pictures from 5 years ago. thanks for the comments.
It is even worse when guys put pics from someone else to attract other guys and then unlock private pics and the guy it is completely different to the public pics…even different ethnicity!!
They must think people is stupid!!
What? Guys are supposed to have profile pics??? Most of the guys in my city set it to private or don’t have one posted at all. Kinda defeats the purpose.
I took all my own pics using a decent quality digital camera on a timer. The oldest is from last summer and though the bronzed look has faded a bit, they’re basically just what I look like.
Having said that, I’ve grown very weary of page after page of dick and ass pics other guys use. I can’t speak for everyone, but I’m interested in a person not just their private parts. How about it guys? Show your faces!
Slight clarification. I meant guys who use those dick and ass shots for their primary pic. Nothing wrong with having those in your locked pics.
Personally I prefer to see a face or body shot. Cock shots are nice but I would rather be surprised. Also I do not understand why younger guys put incorrect and phoney body stats. I have read several profile saying the person is, for example, 69 years old, 5’5″ and 250 lbs but they have a 32 inch waist. I agree there should be a current pic and correct stats.
When a meeting is set up on short notice, based on little discussion, and based mostly on a picture (meaning a guy’s looks), the outcome will be what it is … more often than not a disappointment.
The guys I’ve met here that I value most are, frankly, not model hot. But what they look like isn’t important. They’re gentlemen. They’re considerate. They’re in-freaking-incredible on the workbench. Why? Because we’ve gotten to know each other. We’re connected by more than just sex.
If the goal is only to meet the Hot ones from Hot or Not contests, then profile pictures are totally important.
If the goal is to become acquainted with quality men, men who become your good friends and with whom you enjoy long term play, profile pictures are much less important.
SOME kind of profile picture is required. And no, not of a penis or anus. Whether it’s a head shot, torso shot, full budy (clothed or unclothed), a picture is needed to get the discussion rolling about a connection.
Food for thought: how can you expect someone to be attracted to you (like you) if you are not liking (confident) with your own look?
Personally, I think a face pic should be mandatory on all profiles. Actually, I think that a profile should not be active until at least one visible pic of some sort is posted. I am SO tired of these guys that post no pics. Ten years ago, that might fly, but not in 2013. I get that not everyone is out, and there are married and dl guys online, but still, I think having a clear face pic among your photos should be a requirement. It does not have to be set to be visible to everyone all the time, but maybe it could unlock automatically if the user chooses to message someone. I don’t believe it is asking too much to simply see who you are talking to. It makes me wonder if these faceless people go out to the bar with a ski mask on or something.
GK: we cannot do that, because some guys are curious to try, married or whatever…some people like to keeo it secret, because of family etc…I understand that a bit. I’m sure it’s hard to hookup with guys, when you live in a straight world (wife, kids etc…)
And we like those straight discrete men as well right:P
If you dont like old fake pictures…DO NOT COME TO FAYETTEVILLE NC.
Who doesn’t like a great looking guy’s profile picture. The question is he a good person to go along with a great picture. Being one of the guys who doesn’t have one here, i’ve gotten some really horrible comments. Rude people are not very attractive with or without a picture. Sure it’s 2013 but give us a break, we have our reasons and looks have nothing to do with it.
Great topic!
I myself am 22 and don’t want to put pics up from when i was 18 or 19(Mainly cause that is before i started working out hardcore but still)
I do update with every haircut i get or when i gain some more muscle in the gym, loose a few more ibs etc. That way the guys you are talking to now what you honestly look like and adding pics that show different sides of you(For example i put pics of me shaven, with beard, just a little scruffy, longer hair, shorter hair etc.) can be good as well in my opinion.
I always find it funny when guys post pictures of themselves that have datestamps on them from 7 years ago. How dumb can you be? I agree, post current pictures, putting your best asset forward, and don’t use funny camera angles and blurry shots to hide the true you. Personally I prefer face or body pics over cock shots. I like to leave somethings to the imagination, but not faces. Faces are the most turn on for me….just sayin…
From someone who has reached 51 years of age. The two things that age folks more than any other can be controlled by human behavior changes. Stop smoking cigarettes and keep your weight under control. I have been blessed with a high metabolism which has kept my weight at a constant 160 since my high school years and I’m 6 feet tall. I quit smoking almost 20 years ago and my skin is not dried out and wrinkled. Also, I lotion my whole body liberally each day. Plus it helps to keep a youthful spirit and you too can take a great picture well into your 50’s. But, really we should be looking for what’s on the inside than simply writing a guy off because he’s not your model type looking hottie.
the pics of me R me from last year,basically the same did lose 8lbs n shaved my balls n ass crack n trimmed my cock,so better than last year.oh yea and i show up at agreed upon time.or am home n ready 2 play at such time i dont stand anybody up at my home or at agreed place,i’ve been stood up at home and away
The few dudes getting their pix stolen r usually up all over the net with those pix. Quit acting like the Feds falsely accused u on America’s Most Wanted just bcuz of a stolen pic. My issue is to many dudes not having a decent face pic even in pvt to open. With all kinds of lame closeted excuses knowing damn well they don’t hit up other faceless profiles. Or more often than not if all a dude shows is his dick n ass his dick is probably better looking than his face. And if its the opposite with just head shots their body is wrecked. I wish dudes wld just post a balance of both public or pvt. It wld save me alotta time with the block button. Its 2wice as long as my friends list.
I personally update my profile picture at least once every couple months, my look is ever changing, so why not my profile pic?
also, LOL at the last part “not one from 1993!” if I posted one from ’93 I’d be posting my baby picture which would be awkward…
Whenever you put new pictures on the site, just like when you first joined, there is a day or two waiting period before the pictures are “approved” and actually appear on your updated profile. One assumes that there is somewhere an A4A picture deity with control over which pics are approved and which are not. Why doesn’t this approval person simply reject all the out of focus/completely in the dark/five pixel high/etc. pictures rather than approving them with the full knowledge that they are posted to mislead and only serve the purpose of wasting bandwidth and annoying your customers?
I once met a guy who looked good in his pics and in person! The only thing was the complete distortion of his cock pic! Looked like an 8 incher, turned out to be a 5 or so! Now thats deception
Regarding having your pics stolen: I too have seen pictures taken and used by someone else. However, that can happen on any Internet page you may be found on. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc. you may not even post the picture of yourself, but a friend can. I watch my boss day after day take screen shots of pictures she likes on Instagram. There is no way around it. The ridiculous way guys having of hiding all their pics and unlocking them for 2 minutes only to relock them again don’t realize that anyone can save their pics in that amount of time. If you’re that afraid of being caught, maybe you shouldn’t be doing this anyway…
As the saying goes “A picture is worth 1000 words”… consider this before you post that picture.
To those of you stressing that adam4adam should only approve profiles with pics attached, my question is how would the powers-that-be at a4a know that the pics being uploaded on said profiles are actually of the people creating the profiles? Does that mean to create profiles we’ll have to submit a copy of our drivers license/voters card/passport, etc. to verify the pics?
I’ve always maintained that the internet is a place where everyone can be who they want to be so until I meet a guy in person, I approach meeting any and everyone with caution. As such, I mostly chat with guys on here; rarely does it get to that point that we meet. But I’ve been lucky in that the guys I have decided to meet have been great and we’ve struck up friendships.
It appears to me you want a4a to do all your legwork. Vetting potential booty-calls isn’t a4a’s job; it’s yours. Subscribers of sites that screen applicants/do all the work for you usually require a fee for that service.
i had a guy send me his pic. he looked good. but it was his high school year book pic. so i woudln’t go out with him. too young for me. though he was hot. so a month later i was at a bar. and this guy comes up to me. says i dont remember him and that we chatted on aol. so i went home and looked up his pic. the reason i didnt recognize him. his pic was from 20 years ago. 150 lbs lighter. and all his hair. i asked him on aol while he bothered sending out a pic from 20 years ago. he said he wanted guys to see how hot he was. shrugs.
I’m sorry but “new trend”?!? really?!?
I’m so glad to see this article written. I make for damn sure my profile pix reflect me in various states, haircuts and whatever else and it would be nice if others could do the same. I think its rude to misrepresent, and waste people’s time with fake pix. I happen to work in marketing, so I understand the importance of a good current photo, however I realize that the rest of the world may not understand this concept, so meeting in public first is always a great option.
Yes this may piss me off and no its not fair to the good doers like myself but thats the shitty nature of the internet in general. Nothing is foolproof. Sure I have a choice to reveal my photos to people but I (and we) also have a choice to not interact with people who cannot do it in return.
Why post a pic of your butthole? And they usually look nasty or its from a guy that should never post that kind of pic..some things should be left to find out oh and the cock pics a dick is a dick unless its really a nice one , and it shouldnt be your main pic.
Ive noticed a disturbing trend among black mens profiles on the site, they either use only use pictures of their dicks or only talk about how huge it is and how everyone should be worshipping it.. Now in my opinion, thats just obscene, nobody cares how big yalls dicks are so stop bragging about it!
I had the unfortunate incident of meeting a guy who said he was mid 40s & must have used a pretty old pic. I’m into older, but I do have a limit. I’m thinking he had to be between early to mid 60s when he showed up? Unlike his pic, where he had black hair, it was completely gray (which was the least of the issues, cause some guys look decent with gray you know?). But, between that and the bloated belly (not fat, but bloated like an alcoholic’s), and personal hygiene, ugh total limp dick.
I live in an ‘at will’ work state. I lost one job and was passed over for promotion in another because the boss ‘thought’ I was gay. If you live in a big city you might get away with posting face pictures but in a rural area with not many jobs it is just not a good idea. Also I have learned to Google the hot looking guys. Many times I get several hits from different porn sites with the same picture. My point is if you like a profile, take a chance and chat with the person. I really get tired of the no picture – no chat line.
It never ceases to amaze me how many times i will be contacted by guys with no photos at all as well a s a very sparse profile. i am up front with my photos as well as my hiv status(+) .I have grown tired of chatting with faceless ,nameless beings . if i am interested in someone i will make sure they have a current photo of me within the first couple of emails. i also close with by the way my name is david. somany times they do not respond in kind so after three or so emails w/ no pic or name i am pretty much done since i figure the guy at this point knows quite a bit about me but i know virtually nothing about him so i move on.
the other thing that amuses me is the over abundance of dick and ass shots…especially when someone says they are not looking for hookups just friends…i guess this is logical because i for one find it difficult to be friends with someone unless i know what they look like ass up bent over the back of a chair….i also the profiles that run for years saying “18yo…looking to have sex with or bottom for a guy for the first time” or something of that sort..i would think that unless something is horribly wrong…the limit on those would be a couple of months at least…but maybe i am just being picky. anyhow the bottom line is at least one current photo,accurate profile and description including stats and age..unless you are not ever intending to meet anyone in person…honesty up front will definitely save some awkward moments later…